Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Christmas will be different this year -- finally!

My Parents' Neighbours' Daughter (PND) is pregnant.

It hasn't even been a year since she got married. And I distinctly remember her saying, whenever babies were mentioned, that it would be awhile yet. She's currently got a contract job & has been hoping to parlay it into something permanent.

I don't know what happened in the interim to change her mind (if indeed it was a conscious decision). My mother thinks she succumbed to baby fever -- she's surrounded by friends who are all pregnant or new mothers, and became an aunt for the first time this past fall.

The phone rang on my mother's birthday, a Saturday night in January. It was my parents' phone number. I knew my sister & her boyfriend and PND & her husband were there to celebrate, & I figured my parents had called so that we could all chat.

Dh answered, & said, "Hi PND!" I saw his eyes get big & even before he said "Congratulations!" I knew. I instantly knew.

I felt tears in my eyes, but I got on the phone & said all the right things. And meant them.

I wasn't just emotional because PND is going to have a baby, & I'm not, ever.

I got emotional, because I could just imagine my parents' joy at having a new baby around to spoil. PND's parents now live some distance away, and although her inlaws are close by, my parents will no doubt get to play the role of honorary grandparents.

I was also emotional because I am old enough to be PND's mother (and this baby's grandmother) myself (gulp). I have proudly watched PND grow up from an adorable baby herself into a wonderful young woman and recent bride. And now I get to watch as she becomes a mother. The circle of life, etc. etc.

I was emotional because I find all pregnancies nervewracking these days. I know, more than anyone else, what can go wrong. I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy, let alone someone I adore as much as PND.

Dh asked me if I would prefer if PND had a boy. I think I surprised myself: "No way!" I said. "A little girl would be so much fun to spoil. It would be like watching PND grow up all over again." The prospect made me happy.

We were all sworn to secrecy until after PND's first prenatal appointment. Which is why I am writing this post now, several weeks after the fact. Even on an anonymous blog with pseudonyms, I feel compelled to keep a promise. ; )

Baby PND (PNGD or PNGS??) is due later this summer. Not sure whether to try to plan our usual summertime vacation around the due date. I know too well that babies have their own timetables. Otherwise, I'll probably have to wait until Christmas to see the new baby. That seems too long. :p

"Christmas will be different this year," PND said to me on the phone. PND has spent at least part of every Christmas with us since she was a toddler. Hopefully, that tradition will continue for awhile yet.

We've been looking forward to a "different" Christmas (i.e., one with a baby around) for a long, long time now.

It won't be my baby -- but I think it will be the next best thing. : ) I feel so fortunate to have had PND in our lives, and that she is sharing this blessing with our family.

8 comments:

  1. This is rather lovely. I was reading it thinking about what my own emotions would be.

    But then you wrote "It won't be my baby -- but I think it will be the next best thing" and I got a little teary. I'm glad you are glad, but I'm not unaware of the conflicting emotions that you might feel about this.

    ReplyDelete
  2. PND sounds like a lovely, caring lady. I am sure that you and your parents will enjoy the 'different' Christmas; sometimes it's nice to focus on something/someone else. And I think it could be the start... nay, continuation... of a wonderful tradition. PND shared in your Christmases and now her child will get to do the same. Hugs to you for handling it all with grace and kindness. Please do keep us updated.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I pray that her child will give your heart a special joy. I'm glad she shared that news with you two. It's funny how you can be so happy for someone and yet feel a certain ache, eh?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Here from the Friday Round-up and am so glad I read your post today. I've been struggling the last 2 weeks with my brother-in-law's announcement of their pregnancy EVEN THOUGH I'm seriously contemplating living childfree now. It was still a blow even though I am happy for them.

    But your post is filled with joy and it helps to see someone like you be able to take an announcement like this and take it as much more of the positive that I wish I can imbue. Thank you!

    And congrats to PND and to you - sounds like you will be a very special person in this child's life!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Congratulations to PND. It speaks to the strength of your relationship that she thought to call you right away. And it speaks to your own strength and goodness of heart that you take real pleasure in this news. ((hugs))

    ReplyDelete
  6. It's so odd to hold conflicting emotions at the same time -- both joy and loss. When it happens to me (which it still does, occasionally) my heart breaks open a little bit more from the strain.

    What I love about you and your blog is that you are always open to being broken open. This post is proof.

    ReplyDelete
  7. What a wonderful and moving post Loribeth. I appreciate the mixed emotions you have about PND's news and I am proud of you for how are approaching this. I also really liked how you summed it all up: "It won't be my baby -- but I think it will be the next best thing." I look forward to hearing about this Christmas with PDNS or PDND! :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. You are so caring and compassionate Loribeth!

    And I hope you can time your trip to see the new baby.

    ReplyDelete