Not a #Microblog ;) : Odds & ends on Monday

• No #MicroblogMondays this week, per Mel. If there was, I think this post, or one of the points in it, would be it!  
• Watching the progress of Hurricane Milton towards Florida. One of dh's cousins has a vacation home there. -- Well, actually, a couple of cousins do, but this particular cousin is the one who has generously hosted us at his cottage every fall for the past few years. 
• In fact, they have been telling us ("us" includes BIL & SIL) that we need to go to Florida with them sometime -- and when we were at the cottage with them a few weeks ago, the wife found a great deal on flights for a week in early/mid-December. BIL & SIL jumped at the invitation.  Dh & I regretfully declined, primarily because it's awfully close to when we'll be heading west to see my elderly parents for Christmas. I know sooooo many people who have gotten sick recently (with covid, or otherwise) after travelling, and I just don't want to take the risk then.
• You can guess where this story is going. Their house is in the Tampa Bay area, a few blocks from the beach. They lost their lanai (enclosed porch/sunroom) during a previous hurricane a couple of years ago.  When I checked in with the cousin's wife last week (via text), she told me they'd had an estimated 5 to 7 feet of storm surge hit the house during Hurricane Helene, a week-plus ago. (Gulp.) (They hadn't been there yet to inspect the damage, but they have a property manager who gave them the news.)  The house was still structurally sound, but requires a total renovation, and all the furniture and other stuff they kept there has to be replaced. She was still optimistic they could go in December as planned (!)... but that was before Milton came along...!  
• Thinking of everyone in the storm's path.  Stay safe!  
• As someone who loves to read books (albeit I will admit I don't read as many of them as I did in my younger/pre-tech days), this (gift linked) article from the Atlantic gave me the heebie-jeebies...!  
• "Psst. Don't tell anyone, but we might get a female president."  (Gift link.) I'm three years older than Kamala Harris, and I found myself nodding as I read this part (something I'm not sure young women today fully appreciate):  

Sometimes I think, after 248 years of the United States and 45 men as president, what’s taking so long? And then I remember, it’s been essentially 12 minutes since women could take out our own damn credit cards.

The fact that we’re this close — and with a woman of color, no less, and all the extra sucking mud that involves — is miraculous.

When Harris was born, 60 years ago this month, women could not serve on a jury in all 50 states. They had to have a male relative sign a business loan. They had no legal recourse against sexual harassment or marital rape. There was no no-fault divorce. They could get the pill, but only if they were married. They could not get a legal abortion unless their lives were in danger, and they could be fired for getting pregnant. They could not be admitted to Harvard College or the U.S. Military Academy or join their local Rotary, Kiwanis or Lions Club. Among the Fortune 500 companies, there was not a single female CEO.

To get to the point where she might become the first female U.S. president, Harris first had to become the first female district attorney of San Francisco, the first female attorney general of California and the first female vice president of the United States.

• Tangentially related to the usual fare on this blog, I loved this article in the Toronto Star about growing efforts to identify and memorialize the people buried in unmarked, sometimes mass graves, so-called "Potter's Fields." (Sorry, no gift links available, but if you hit a paywall, I find that saving the article and then opening it in Pocket sometimes helps.) 
• Tangentially related to the above point:  often, especially in years gone by, unmarked/mass graves became the resting place of stillborn infants. The Children's Garden at Mount Pleasant Cemetery in Toronto memorializes these babies, the result of one bereaved mother's efforts to find out where her infant son was buried, 30 years earlier.  The pregnancy loss support group dh & I belonged to used to hold an annual "Walk to Remember" and dove release at the Children's Garden site during October/Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month, and Mary Smith, the mother who created the garden, almost always attended.  
• Here's an article that includes the story of Mary Smith and the Children's Garden. 
• And here's a 2008 blog post I wrote about the Walk to Remember and the Children's Garden. 
• (If it's not obvious, the memorial I mention at the end, "erected by the drummer of a very well-known, Toronto-based Canadian classic rock band, in memory of his 19-year-old daughter," refers to Neil Peart of Rush. And now, of course, he's gone too. :(  There is space on the monument for him;  I haven't been back there in years so I have no idea whether it's been updated or where if he is buried/his ashes are interred there -- if, of course, he's actually buried anywhere at all.)  
• Carolyn Hax, advice columnist in the Washington Post, recently published this doozy: "Husband has been lying for entire marriage about wanting kids." (Gift link.) I know this is not an entirely uncommon scenario (albeit it usually comes up before you've been married 8 years and together a lot longer than that). 
• Not too much later from Carolyn:  "Name they chose for baby they lost was just given to newborn niece."  (I personally know a few people this has happened to...!)  
• Ryan Rose Weaver interviewed Rebecca Little and Colleen Long, authors of the new book "I'm Sorry for My Loss," in her Substack, now called "In Tending."  
• "Both loss parents themselves... [they] had set out to write the definitive book on how pregnancy loss is viewed and experienced in America – and in their words, “Why we are so bad at it.” "
• The book includes 100 stories about perinatal grief -- including their own, and including Weaver's.   
• I wrote about this book when I first heard about it, here, and hope to read it very soon! -- seems very appropriate for Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month!
• "Voters without kids are in the political spotlight – but they’re not all the same." The authors spoke at the Zoom call organized by the Alliance for Child-Free Voters in early September, which I wrote about here. 

It’s too soon to know whether child-free people can be thought of as a distinct voting bloc. But...  Given their size, growth, organization and liberal leanings, it may be time for American politicians to think more carefully about how child-free people fit in.

"Eat Pray Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert

The October book for my Childless Collective Nomo Book Club is "Eat Pray Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert (who is childfree by choice).   

This is not my first time reading this book: I first read it back in the fall of (gulp) 2008 -- how can that be 16 years ago, already??!  It was the early days of this blog, and Mel chose it for her Barren Bitches Book Tour. My tour post about the book then was more about participating in the discussion and answering some of the posted questions than an overall review (you can find that post here, as well as a related post here). I didn't join Goodreads until 2016, I think? but I did add & rate some books there retroactively, and gave EPL 4 stars. I also saw the 2010 movie version with Julia Roberts and Javier Bardem (yum!).   

It was interesting to revisit this book again, so many years later -- albeit it was difficult to view it in a completely fresh & unbiased way.  After all, EPL quickly became a cultural phenomenon (which Gilbert comments on in a new introduction to the 10th anniversary edition -- it will be 20 years in 2026 since the book was published!), and launched a wave of women travelling solo to exotic destinations.  

By now, the book's premise is familiar (even to those who haven't actually read it yet): in 2003, after the collapse of her marriage, her job and basically her entire life, Gilbert decided to spend a year travelling and living in three different countries: Italy, where she would realize her ambition of learning to speak Italian;  India, where she would spend time at an ashram with her guru (!);  and Indonesia (Bali), where she would seek balance and study with a traditional medicine man she'd met once before (and which is also where she met her future husband, Felipe). (They are now divorced.) In 2008, the "eat" section in Italy was my favourite, and I still think it is today. (Italian food -- what's not to like, right?)  But there are some fascinating insights into three very different cultures throughout the book. 

It's a fairly easy read, divided into 108 relatively short chapters (the same number as the beads on a standard prayer/meditation necklace, as Gilbert explains early on in the book).  While it's usually shelved among the memoirs/biographies in bookstores and libraries, I would say it's part memoir, part travelogue, part history lesson, part spiritual exploration and part self-help book.  

There was a lot of criticism of this book and the author when it first came out: she was called "selfish" (selfish? -- a single, childless/free woman in her mid-30s? hmmm, this sounds familiar...), whiny and self-absorbed.  I didn't really think any of that when I first read the book, and I didn't think that now either (although she did sometimes seem a little flighty/scattered).  What did strike me: her voracious appetite to learn new and experience things. And the wry humour!   

I previously rated this book 4 stars on Goodreads, based on my 2008 reading & blog post, and I think that's still a fair assessment today.  

I also read and loved "City of Girls" by the same author in 2019 (reviewed here).

November's book will be a classic that I've not yet read: "Persuasion" by Jane Austen. (And I'll be leading the discussion, so I'd better start reading soon...!) 

This was Book #28 read to date in 2024 (and Book #1 finished in October), bringing me to 62%  of my 2024 Goodreads Reading Challenge goal of 45 books. I am (for the moment, anyway...!) 6 (!) books behind schedule to meet my goal. :(  You can find reviews of all my books read to date in 2024 tagged as "2024 books."    

Right now

Right now...* 

*(an occasional (mostly monthly) meme, alternating from time to time with "The Current"). (Explanation of how this started & my inspirations in my first "Right now" post, here. Also my first "The Current" post, here.)

September was...nice.  :)  The weather was mostly nice, we had a lovely cottage weekend, saw some friends, spent some time with family (albeit never enough with the kids, lol). (But where has this year gone??)  

Pandemic diary/update: September was month #54 since the covid pandemic began in March 2020 -- now in Year FIVE. :(   And we continued to hear about people we know coming down with covid -- many of then for the first time, others for the second, third or more. I've heard of several seniors/care homes, including one in the town where my parents live, that were closed to visitors & new admissions because of the high number of covid cases. Again. :(  

We (still!) remain covid-free (knocking wood, loudly...), and we continue to mask in stores, malls and (most) other indoor public spaces hereabouts, especially where there are a lot of people around. (Well, I do -- I know dh has been slacking off again, whenever I'm not around to hand him a mask...!) 

This article in the Atlantic, from earlier in the month, explains why you should still be testing (and getting an updated vaccine). (Gift link.) 

Among other things we did this month, we: 

• Spent a pleasant (albeit slightly chilly -- I had to borrow a sweater!) afternoon on the Sunday (Sept. 1st) of the Labour Day long weekend with dh's aunts, uncles & cousins (and their kids and grandkids)(on his dad's side) at his cousin's home. They have a large house & property, including a swimming pool, and the kids had a blast. A little too much back-to-school and parenting chatter for my comfort, but it was nice to see everyone, including one cousin and her family who were visiting from Australia! 
• Went shopping for supplies before our cottage weekend at the supermarket and butcher shop, and picked up a new board game to play from the mega-bookstore (Sept. 5th). 
• Spent a hugely enjoyable weekend at dh's cousin's cottage (Sept. 6th-8th), for the 4th year in a row. The weather did not co-operate -- it was mostly grey, drizzly and increasingly chilly -- so there were no boat rides and I never even made it down to the dock on the waterfront once (although dh ventured down there briefly a couple of times).  But we were still able to get out for a couple of walks (where we saw a lot of deer!) and onto the deck for some hotly contested games of corn hole!  (lol)  Inside, we had the fireplace going, the men watched umpteen games of U.S. college, NFL & CFL football (far too many for my liking...!), we played a lot of board games -- and, of course, we ATE!  (lol) (See "Eating/Drinking," below!)  
• Met up with a half-dozen women from the Childless Collective community (Sept. 14th) -- most of them locals, but one visiting from Washington State with a friend!  We had lunch on the patio at a restaurant near where I live and had a lovely time!  
• Took part in a webinar for World Childless Week with Michael Hughes of the Full Stop podcast on Sept. 16th:  "What Can We Learn From Our Family History?" 
• Browsed at our recently renovated/reorganized mega-bookstore (but didn't buy anything) and then at a nearby women's wear store (Sept. 17th). 
• Spent a morning at the mall (Sept. 18th), walking, shopping and having lunch. Bought a few things for the great-niblings :)  as well as a T-shirt at Old Navy and a cookie scoop at Kitchen Stuff Plus for myself, and a couple of things at the drugstore.  
• I spent three Thursday evenings this month taking part in a Zoom webinar series sponsored by the Ontario Genealogical Society's Toronto Branch, about.... land registry records in Ontario, lol.  Maybe not the most fascinating topic, but well presented, and having three sessions allowed time to go through the structure in detail and reinforce what we'd learned from week to week.  Hoping to be able to (eventually!) look into the relevant records for my ancestors. (I'll be doing another OGS webinar series in October about writing about your family history.)  
• Headed back to our old community on Sept. 25th for a visit to our family doctor. We couldn't book physicals until late October (I guess he only does them on certain days?) and I told the girl on the phone that we would need our prescriptions renewed before then, so this was a visit to do that. 
• Went to the drugstore with dh on Sept. 26th to pick up his prescription and a few sundries -- taking advantage of his Seniors Day 20% discount!  lol  
• Headed back to our old community (again) on Sept. 27th for a cemetery visit, followed by a trip to the mall for lunch, haircuts and some shopping/walking.  Picked up a few Halloween goodies at the dollar store there for Little Great-Nephew & Little Great-Niece. 
• Went with BIL & SIL on Sept. 28th to visit stepMIL & family. We used to go fairly regularly, even after FIL died in 2018, but not that often since the pandemic began, and we hadn't been there since January (erk!)(although we did see stepMIL at dh's uncle's birthday party in late April). Her grandson is now 16, just got his G1 (learner's permit/restricted driver's license) and is almost 6 feet tall! 

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Also right now:  

Reading: I finished 3 books in September (reviewed on this blog, as well as Goodreads & StoryGraph, & tagged "2024 books").  

• "Fletcher’s End" by D.E. Stevenson, with my DES group -- a sequel to "Bel Lamington." Our group read started May 20th and finished in mid-September. (My latest review; original review.) 
• "Moonflower Murders" by Anthony Horowitz. The TV version began on PBS on Sept. 15th. I wanted to have the book read by then -- and didn't -- but I did have the first several chapters read, and finished it before episode 2 aired!  (See "Watching," below.) (My review.) 
• "Magic for Marigold" by L.M. Montgomery, with my L.M. Montgomery Readathon Facebook Group. I read this earlier in the summer, before our group read/discussion began on July 1st and finished on Sept. 30th. (My latest review;  original review.) 

This brings me to 27 books read so far in 2024, 60% of my 2024 Goodreads Reading Challenge goal of 45 books.  I am currently 6 (!) books behind schedule to meet my goal. :(   

Current reads: 

• "Eat Pray Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert (October book for my Childless Collective Nomo Book Club) (also a Barren Bitches Book Tour selection from October 2008, the early days of this blog! -- discussed here;  related post here). Currently at about 62% read. 
• "Living the Life Unexpected" by Jody Day.  I'm once again taking part in a chapter-by-chapter group read of this CNBC classic!  The most recent meeting covered Chapter 2. This is the 5th (!) time I've read this book, or the earlier version of it ("Rocking the Life Unexpected").  (Most recent review, with links to earlier reviews, here.)  
• "The Mirror and the Light" by Hilary Mantel (book #3 in the Thomas Cromwell Trilogy) -- part of a year-long "slow readalong" hosted by Simon at Footnotes and Tangents.  We started during the week of July 21st.  I chose to focus on some of my other books over the past couple of weeks, and as a result, I'm currently about 6 weeks behind the reading schedule (! -- gulp...), at about 29% read -- hoping to catch up, eventually...! We will finish the group read at the end of December. 
• "War and Peace" by Leo Tolstoy (!). As I wrote here, I need another book club/readalong obligation like a hole in the head  ;)  but nevertheless, I'm taking part in a year-long readalong of this book, hosted by Simon at Footnotes and Tangents -- a chapter a day for a full year, which began Jan. 1, 2024. (And I'm really enjoying it!)  Currently at about 80% read.  
• "L.M. Montgomery and Gender," an essay collection edited by E. Holly Pike & Laura Robinson. Slowly working my way through, in between the other books...! 

Coming up: Most of my book groups have their next reads plotted out for a few months in advance -- and listing them here helps me keep track of what I should be reading next. ;)  

• For my Childless Collective Nomo Book Club: 
• "Persuasion" by Jane Austen (November). 
• "The Christmas Orphans Club" by Becca Freeman (reviewed here). December) 
• For my D.E. Stevenson group:  This list of upcoming books should keep us busy well into 2025 or even 2026!  (A couple of the books are ones we covered shortly after I first joined the group back in 2014 -- you know you've been around for a while when....!)  
• Miss Buncle’s Book (beginning Oct. 7th;  original 2015 review here).  
• Peter West 
• Miss Buncle Married (original 2015 review here).
• The Two Mrs. Abbotts (original 2015 review here).
• Crooked Adam 
• The Four Graces (original 2015 review here). 

• For the Notes from Three Pines (Louise Penny mysteries) Substack Readalong: The last discussion was for book #3, "The Cruellest Month," posted in June 2023 (no further posts/books since then).  I've continued dipping into the series on my own, between other book club obligations. Book #6, "Bury Your Dead," is the next one on my to-read list! 
• Other books on my priority list: 
• "The Marlow Murder Club" by Robert Thorogood.  Hoping to have this one read before the TV version begins airing on PBS on Oct. 27th.   

A few recently purchased titles (mostly in digital format, mostly discounted ($5-10 or less) or purchased with points):

• "We Solve Murders" by Richard Osman (from my sister, and high on my "want to read soon" list!). 
• "What Time the Sexton's Spade Doth Rust" by Alan Bradley (Flavia de Luce #11)(ditto above!).  
• "I'm Sorry for My Loss" by Rebecca Little & Colleen Long (which I mentioned in this post, when I first learned about it) 
• "The Grief Cure" by Cody Delistraty 
• "A Pocketful of Happiness" by Richard E. Grant 
• "The Aftermath" by Philip Bump 
• "The Briar Club" by Kate Quinn 
• "Uncle Mame" by Eric Myers
• "Girlfriend on Mars" by Deborah Willis 
• "The Queen of Poisons" by Robert Thorogood 
• "The Sisterhood" by Liza Mundy 

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Watching:  

• On YouTube, on Sept. 3rd, a conversation between two amazing Canadian authors:  Louise Penny & Alan Bradley, marking the launch of Bradley's new book.   
• "Moonflower Murders" on PBS, the adaptation of the Anthony Horowitz novel, which I just finished reading (see link to my review, above). So far, I've seen 3 of the 6 episodes, and I'm enjoying it hugely.  :)   

Listening:  To Heardle Decades: Stats as of  Sept. 30th: 

• Heardle 60s: 76.5% (550/719, 219 on first guess), down 0.1% from last month. For some reason, the stats for my current/maximum winning streak are now listed as the same as the total number of games won (i.e., 550).  Before this, my maximum streak was 15.
• Heardle 70s: 79.7% (366/459, 205 on first guess), down 0.3% from last month. Max. streak: 18. 
• Heardle 80s: 41.1% (137/333, 55 on first guess), down 0.3% from last month. Max. streak: 4. 
• Heardle 90s: 26.4% (115/436, 24 on first guess), down 0.1% from last month. Max. streak: 4. 

Also:  I haven't been listening to a lot of podcasts lately, but I did listen to Stephanie Joy Phillips, founder of World Childless Week, on New Legacy Radio with Christine Erickson, live on Sept. 3rd. (The episode is available as a podcast to listen to.)  

Following:  My stats for the New York Times Connections game!  I've been playing Connections for a few months now (and I'm even in a Facebook group with one of my mother's cousins and a couple of her friends, where we share our daily results with each other), and in early September, they started a new feature where you could check your daily stats!  They go back to June 15th.  You can even check your "mistake distribution," which shows how many mistakes/unsuccessful attempts you used (you get up to 4).  

The first set of stats they gave me showed that I'd completed 38 games, and won 76% of them, including 19 "perfect puzzles" (with zero errors) -- not bad, eh?  My maximum winning streak then was 8.  

By the end of September, I'd completed 64 games and won 77% of them, including 33 "perfect puzzles" (i.e., more than 50%!) and a maximum winning streak of 13 (and counting...!).  :)   

Eating/Drinking:  

• Not enough fruits & veggies lately, I think...  :(  
• Plenty of pork! lol  We went to a family gathering at dh's cousin's on Sept. 1st, and BIL suggested that, as our contribution to the eats, the four of us should chip in and buy a "porchetta" (which could sometimes be an entire whole roasted pig, but generally means a large, seasoned pork roast) from a local Italian butcher shop. We picked it up from the butcher on our way to the party.  BIL vastly overestimated the quantity needed (typical...!), and everyone wound up taking a package of leftover pork home, which we had for dinner a couple of days in a row before throwing out the rest!  
• At dh's cousin's cottage, the menu included lasagna (store-bought -- pesto for me, tomato sauce for everyone else), hot dogs, fettucine (alfredo sauce for me, tomato sauce for everyone else, made from cherry tomatos from our hostess's garden), sausage with potatos & peppers, breaded veal cutlets -- and homemade gnocchi!  
• Our hostess realized she hadn't brought enough frozen gnocchi with her -- but she did have lots of potatos -- so we made our own!  I even helped by etching each little dough nugget with a fork to create ridges that would help hold the sauce. There are lots of different sauces you can use for gnocchi, but we just panfried them with melted butter and fresh sage, topped with freshly grated parmesan. Yum!  
• We also indulged in alcohol more than we usually do. A couple of glasses of (white) wine on both Friday & Saturday, and I also had a cooler on Saturday afternoon. I declined wine for Sunday lunch. I was feeling pretty tired by then, and I wanted to stay awake!  lol 
• Unfortunately, I woke up on Monday with what looked to me like gout in the big toe of my left foot -- the same place where I previously had a (much worse) case of gout three years ago. It was slightly sore and a little red, particularly in the morning. I took ibuprofen, tried to keep the foot elevated, drank black cherry juice and used ice occasionally. It was mostly better by the time we saw our doctor last week, and seems to have pretty much cleared up now -- fingers crossed...! 
• Had my usual fish & chips for lunch on the patio at the Pickle Barrel with several women from the Childless Collective on Sept. 14th. 
• Takeout:  The usual soup & pizza slices from the supermarket, generally once or twice a week; takeout teriyaki rice bowls (also from the supermarket), Chinese food from Mandarin; Swiss Chalet takeout rotisserie chicken with a baked potato (I can never eat the whole thing, but the leftovers made good sandwiches the next day!); and California Sandwiches.

Buying (besides books, lol):  

• Some new sterling silver earrings from my favourite local jewelry artisan. 
• Some new clothes for Little Great-Nephew & Little Great-Niece, including Halloween-themed T-shirts. 
• A new T-shirt for me from Old Navy. 

Wearing:  Still wearing shorts, capris and sandals (and enjoying them while the good weather lasts...!) -- although I had to pull on a hoodie, long yoga pants and socks while we were at the cottage!  But I think the days of sleeveless blouses and T-shirts are done for another year... 

Enjoying/Loving:  The drop in extreme heat & humidity. :)  

Appreciating:  Dh's cousins' generosity and hospitality in inviting us to their cottage (for the 4th September/October in a row).  We always enjoy their company!   

Noticing: It's getting darker outside a lot earlier lately (and the time hasn't changed yet!).   

Also, the fall colours seem to be taking their time to pop out...! Still not too evident hereabouts... just a tinge of yellow or red here & there... 

Also:  It's early October and the air conditioning is still kicking in! (??)  It hasn't been particularly warm, but it HAS been slightly humid, on & off.  

Trying:  To read at a little bit every night before turning out the lights (if not earlier in the day too).  

Prioritizing:  Book club reading first, then my own picks. 

Wondering:  When we should head home for Christmas holidays? (Time to book our tickets soon!) 

Wanting: Another pedicure soon, before shoes & socks weather returns...!  (Maybe next week, before Thanksgiving?)  

Hoping:  For good results from our upcoming bloodwork (at least, nothing worse than last year's results??).  

Anticipating: Spending some time with Little Great-Nephew this weekend.  He'll be spending the day at his grandparents' house while his parents attend a wedding downtown.  Younger Nephew might be bringing Little Great-Niece over then too.  :)  

Also: Seeing them all the following weekend for (Canadian) Thanksgiving. We've spent the last several Thanksgivings in Manitoba with my family, since we weren't able to get there during the summers, but since we were there this summer (finally!), we'll be staying here. (Back west for Christmas!) 

Feeling:  (Mostly) Happy with life at the moment.  :)  

"Magic for Marigold" by L.M. Montgomery (re-read)

My L.M.   Readathon Facebook group just finished reading and discussing "Magic for Marigold," one of her lesser-known books, first published in 1929. (I read through the book on my own first, prior to when our discussions started on July 1st, and posted my original review here.) 

"Marigold" is six-year-old Marigold Lesley, who lives with her young widowed mother, Lorraine, her "Young Grandmother" and "Old Grandmother" at the Lesley family home, Cloud of Spruce (a Montgomery-esque name if I ever heard one!), on Prince Edward Island.  

Many elements of this story will be familiar to fans of Montgomery's other novels: beautiful descriptions of nature; witty dialogue and a sharp sense of humour; absent/dead parents; large, judgmental extended families headed by domineering women;  imaginary friends;  beloved cats;  faithful family servants... 

But -- I'll admit I (still, upon second reading) just don't find Marigold as "int'resting" (one of her favourite phrases) as many of Montgomery's other heroines. Perhaps because she's a child? (She's 12 by the time the book ends.)  There's not a lot going on, plot-wise, but there are some funny stories about Marigold's youthful scrapes and mishaps. There are also some wince-inducing episodes as Marigold navigates childhood and her "tween" years (facing fears, the cruelty of other girls, the adults who just don't understand...). 

Content warning:  Some dated attitudes and language here (regarding French-Canadians, for example). Also -- and I forgot to mention this in my previous review -- there's an episode concerning Marigold's terrifying encounter with a woman who has "not been in her right mind" since the death of her young daughter/only child a year ago (ugh!!). 

My initial rating of 3.5 stars on StoryGraph, rounded down to 3 stars on Goodreads, remains unchanged.   

(Next Readathon book TBA.)

This was Book #27 read to date in 2024 (and Book #3 finished in September), bringing me to 60%  of my 2024 Goodreads Reading Challenge goal of 45 books. I am (for the moment, anyway...!) 6 (!) books behind schedule to meet my goal. :(  You can find reviews of all my books read to date in 2024 tagged as "2024 books."    

Friday odds & ends

• Lyz Lenz recently asked her "Men Yell at Me" readers "What do you think about having children?" To date, there have been almost 270 responses! Lyz's introduction to the topic:  

There is a lot of conversation in our culture about children and parenting, specifically the role of women who choose not to have children. Recently, Glynnis MacNicol wrote an op-ed for the NYT about the role she plays in the lives of the children of her friends. And it has me thinking about community, gender roles, expectations, and the declining birth rate.

I’d love to hear your thoughts about having or not having kids. Do you have them? Would you change anything? It is a dicey topic that sits at the fraught intersection of pain, grief, loss, politics, choice, coercion, and so much more. So, please keep your thoughts personal. No language like “people who do have kids are selfish” and vice versa.  

 

The discussion is for paid subscribers only, but I can tell you about some of the common themes.  

• Lyz's readers are generally a pretty thoughtful bunch. Even so, I was (pleasantly) surprised by the overall tone and variety of situations mentioned in the discussion.    
• There were a few parents who knew they always wanted kids, had a bunch, wouldn't trade, best thing I've ever done, looking forward to being a grandparent, etc. etc.  
• But even among the parents, there were tales of ambivalence, of not being able to have as many children as they had wanted -- or realizing that maybe one was enough -- and recognition/acknowledgement that parenthood is not for everyone and should not be imposed on anyone who really doesn't want it.  (Also, not a lot of fans of "mom culture.")  
• A surprising (to me) number of people who identified as non-parents, for a wide variety of reasons (related to both choice and circumstance).   
• There were also several comments pointing out that it's perfectly fine not to have children -- period.  Sample comment in this vein: 

I'd like it to be normalized that people who don't have kids don't immediately have to do the "but I love kids and I'm the fun auntie/uncle and I do a lot of good stuff in my community" routine. 

 

It's okay to have kids. It's fine not to. Just because you have kids doesn't mean you automatically add value to the community you live in, and just because you don't have kids doesn't mean you automatically are a deficit to the community.

• Washington Post advice columnist Carolyn Hax published a letter recently from a reader whose young daughter is being lavished with extravagant gifts of designer clothing from her elderly great-aunt. As an indulgent great-auntie myself who loves to shop for clothes for them (something I never could have envisioned, 25 years ago!), I can relate ;)  and I loved Carolyn's advice. 
• From the New York Times (gift link):  "The Politics of Motherhood Become a Campaign-Trail Cudgel." (Subhead:  The presidential race has exposed a fault line in American political culture over the deeply personal decision to have children.) 
• A personal essay in the Globe & Mail:  "Selena Gomez’s openness about her struggles with infertility help me talk about my own." (As always, beware the comments!)  Sample passage: 

The added element of shame that infertility carries can often make people hesitant to talk about it. In fact, I am hesitant writing this piece for the world – and so many people in my life – to discover this about me.

“Many people with infertility feel like they’re less valuable as a person because they can’t do what seems like a very basic human thing, which is to procreate,” says Jennifer Gordon, an associate professor of psychology at the University of Regina and director of the Reproductive Mental Health Research Unit. “People with infertility are also often bombarded by unhelpful advice or judgmental comments from others when they share.” [Note from Loribeth:  That's the understatement of the year, isn't it??] 

• A few weeks ago, I mentioned a presentation by Ali Hall on Medium Day titled "Why It's Important to Make Space for the Childless and Childfree." She's turned her remarks into a written post for both Medium and Substack, including a link to the video of her talk. Well worth reading and/or watching! (Ali is childfree by choice, but I find her pretty inclusive of the childless not by choice.) 
• Ruth Ben-Ghiat, who writes about threats to democracy in her Substack, Lucid, explains the roots of certain politicians' current obsession with childlessness and population management. (It's not pretty.)   
• From Jennie Agg at Life, Almost:  "Is taboo the right word any more?"  (Subhead: "What we don't talk about when we talk about miscarriage.")  Sample passage: 

There is, perhaps, an illusion of increasing openness that doesn’t match up to the way miscarriage is actually experienced. Stories of miscarriage tend to be told only in certain spaces, from a certain angle, from certain kinds of people. What’s more, talking about miscarriage is often presented as a self-contained solution, rather than one small part in bringing about actual improvements to medical care or any deeper, scientific understanding of this part of the human experience.

and 

If women continue to express shock, pain, and loneliness in response to what is widely acknowledged to be commonplace, that should be a red-light warning that something’s wrong with the system. It suggests that there is a gap between what people feel and need after a miscarriage and what society allows for...  what we are really saying – what we really mean when we call miscarriage a taboo – is: nothing has changed. You’re not listening to me. 

#MicroblogMondays: Small pleasures & annoying things

Small pleasures:  

• Finishing a book this weekend!  :)  
• Weather that's (still) mild enough to allow us to keep the balcony door open during the day. :)  
• Still being able to wear my capris & sandals when we go out. :)  
• Watching the leaves on the trees gradually turning colour. 
• Getting some new photos texted to us of Little Great-Niece. :)  

Annoying things:  

• Football.  :p  (Sorry, dh, but between college games, NFL & CFL, it's on ALL THE TIME right now, and I have absolutely NO INTEREST in it!) 
• (Small pleasure/revenge:  Figure skating season starts soon!!  lol)  
• The numbers on the scale that either refuse to budge or head in the wrong direction.... :p  
• Having to figure out what's for dinner. Every. Single. Night.  :p  Once in a while, I have a decided preference, but a lot of the time, I haven't got a clue (and neither does dh...!). All I know is I'll be hungry...!  lol  
• Not enough hours in the day sometimes... 
• Not being able to come up with anything different to post for #MicroblogMondays. ;)  

You can find more of this week's #MicroblogMondays posts here.  

"Moonflower Murders" by Anthony Horowitz

I have a gazillion book club and readalong obligations at the moment.  Which book to pick up/focus on first/next?  

Naturally, my choice was... none of the above, lol.  But I did have an obligation/deadline of sorts (albeit entirely self-imposed). The first episode of the TV version of Anthony Horowitz's mystery novel "Moonflower Murders" -- a sequel to "Magpie Murders," which I thoroughly enjoyed (and reviewed here) -- was beginning on PBS on Sept. 15th, and I wanted to have the book read by then.   

Our heroine -- 40-something, childless Susan Ryeland -- has relocated to the island of Crete, where she and her sexy Greek boyfriend, Andreas, are running a small hotel together. The scenery is idyllic, but the challenges of running a business in a very different culture are definitely not.  The inn is desperately in need of repairs, money is tight -- and Susan misses London and her former career as a book editor (which came to an abrupt end at the conclusion of "Magpie Murders").  

Then a British couple, the Trehernes -- hotel owners themselves -- arrive with a strange story -- and a lucrative offer for Susan. A guest at their hotel, Frank Parris, was murdered on the same day as the wedding of their daughter, Cecily. One of Susan's former clients, a mystery writer named Alan Conway, knew Parris, and wound up using the murder as inspiration for one of his novels, "Atticus Pund Takes the Case," with several of the characters thinly disguised versions of the real-life people he met at the hotel. After reading the book, Cecily called her father to say she believed it proved the innocence of the man convicted of Parris's murder.   

And then Cecily disappeared. 

(Mild spoiler alert:)  Alan Conway died in the previous book ("Magpie Murders") -- and Susan knew him and his books better than anyone else. Can she use her knowledge of the book to solve the mystery of who really killed Frank Parris -- and find out what happened to Cecily?  

First, of course, she'll have to re-read Conway's book, to see if she can spot the same critical clue that Cecily did. Like "Magpie Murders," there's a book-within-the-book embedded in the pages of "Moonflower Murders" (two for the price of one, if you will!) -- the complete text of "Atticus Pund takes the Case," a classic "golden age" detective novel, a la Agatha Christie.   

I figured out one of the several whodunnits this book contains -- but there were some surprises, too.  :)  

I loved "Magpie Murders," and I loved this book too. Very cleverly executed and written -- and a whole lot of fun!  :)     

4.5 stars on StoryGraph, rounded up to 5 stars on Goodreads.

*** *** *** 

I didn't finish the book in time for episode 1 of "Moonflower Murders" on PBS last week, but I had read enough of it by then that there weren't any real spoilers. Episode 2 (of 6) airs tonight! I am enjoying the show as well as the book. Once again, Susan -- the wonderful Lesley Manville -- finds herself chatting with the fictional Atticus Pund (Tim McMullen) and taking advice from him as she tries to solve her own case. Once again, some of the actors play dual roles, showing up in Pund's story as well as Susan's, adding to the fun.   

Apparently there's a third Susan Ryeland book in the works -- "Marble Hall Murders," coming out in March -- and I'll look forward to reading that one too! 

This was Book #26 read to date in 2024 (and Book #2 finished in September), bringing me to 58%  of my 2024 Goodreads Reading Challenge goal of 45 books. I am (for the moment, anyway...!) 6 (!) books behind schedule to meet my goal. :(  You can find reviews of all my books read to date in 2024 tagged as "2024 books."