* So I was happy to see this response from advice columnist Carolyn Hax (via a FB share from Gateway Women): "Call out friend who thinks childless means not busy." Choice quote (one suggested response): "Yes, I'm all naps & bonbons." ROFL!!
* The idea that no kids = life of leisure is one of my big pet peeves. I've posted on this topic several times in the past, including here.
* And while I'm in a ranty mood on the topic of parents vs non ;) here's another great post I found on FB recently: "Yes, I CAN judge your kids." Nancy Roman is 64 and blogs at Not Quite Old, as well as repostings at Huff/Post 50, about her life, including aging and not having children. (The last line of this post is quite the kicker.) I'm looking forward to reading more from her in the future!
You can find more of this week's #MicroblogMondays posts here.
Lately I've been seeing this a lot too...it's so belittling!
ReplyDeleteI don't have my own children, but I work full time and take care of a home, three very active dogs and my husband...along with a social life, volunteering and babysitting my nephews for 3 out of 7 days a week. So maybe I'm not a mother, but don't tell me I don't know what exhaustion is...
I'm off to read those articles you shared! :-)
I think most people get judgemental. It's like the age old working moms against stay-at-home moms debate. Kids or no kids - who's to say 'I am the busiest'?
ReplyDeleteI've been feeling ranty too. Blaming the weather.
ReplyDeleteI hate memes like this one for many reasons. One being those who post them usually are the ones not shouldering the majority of the work. The other being that these same people tend to not reflect on the fact that life comes in many forms. It's selfish. The only way I've found to combat these is with humor.
Anyway, thanks for the links!
I can totally see how this would make you ranty. People are so judgemental, and these days, everyone seems to be in a 'who's the busiest?' competition. It drives me insane. I have two friends with four kids each, and they are constantly telling me how much tougher their lives are compared to mine, since I only have one. Ugh- I just smile sweetly, and say that I'd be more than happy to trade places for them for a day. Particularly on a day when I'm working my fourth night shift in a row, while still being a parent and a wife. We all have our own paths, and none are necessarily any easier or harder than any other. Grrrrr....
ReplyDeleteOh, I'm with you on the ranty feelings! We've just had relatives visit. It's been frustrating, to say the least. Especially when the SIL tells me that it would be easy for my husband and I to leave this city if we wanted to, ignoring the fact that the parents-in-law live here and are increasingly frail. Especially when she and my husband's brother visit only every two years, and casually comments she hasn't seen any change in them. Argh! Maybe having kids makes you unobservant about other peoples' issues? Sorry ... I didn't really want to get started. But it's that whole implication that we're free and easy, because we don't have children, that drives me nuts. And lack of acknowledgement of what we are in fact doing.
ReplyDeleteKicker, indeed. I'm glad you pointed me to the Huff50 article.
ReplyDeleteI remember as a kid not understanding why people who vie to have the worst lot in life. Humans are a strange species, that we point out "look how hard I have it -- so much worse than you!"
dear Loribeth, thank you so much for sharing Yes, I CAN Judge Your Kids. Brilliant! I just love it.
ReplyDeleteI'm feeling a bit ragey too! I stumbled accross teh "Yes, I can judge your kids" article the other day and I totally agree. The only thing is, not only do I judge the kids, but I also judge the parents. Because if kids aren't taught proper behavior, it's a parenting problem. And I love the Carolyn Hax response. I often resort to sarcasm (and sometimes a bit of oversharing) in these situations.
ReplyDeleteOh yes, I'm feeling the rant right now, hence why I've been trying to spend little time on Facebook this week. You know who is tired? Um... everyone. Everyone is tired because life moves too quickly.
ReplyDeleteIs it just me or is just women who do this judgment thing?
ReplyDeleteWe had my brother in law tell us how REALLY lucky we were not to have kids. He has two and he carries a chip on his shoulder about almost everything; his wife was horrified at his comment.
DeleteAt the time we were in the middle of IVF treatment (of which they didn’t know about). In my quietest and most serious (read angriest) voice I told him I’d happily swap every day with him if I could.
My sister in law told me later that I had made him realise that he did have a good life to be happy with. He’d never thought about the alternative. Yeah, walk a mile in my shoes mate!
We all get on like a house on fire now!