She would have been 9 years old today. :(

Today was my due date in 1998. The first one they gave me, anyway. With each ultrasound (I had five in all), they revised the date, but since this was the first, it has stuck in my mind. 

Nine years. What a different life we would be leading right now, if only... 

What kind of a birthday party would we be planning for this weekend? Does anyone else in the world remember that, nine years ago, we were supposed to have a baby right about now? 

Of course, one of my colleagues on parental leave picked today to bring the 22-month-old girl she & her dh have adopted to the office to show off. I know she has had her own problems building the family she has wanted, and the child is absolutely adorable... but why today?? And a dad also on parental leave came in for awhile (sans infant, thankllfuy), but of course, full of news about his own bundle of joy. ARGH... 

Eight years ago, I would have fled to the bathroom in tears. I haven't cried (yet?)... but I have been very, very tired all day. I think next year (the big 10) is going to be a toughie. : ( 

Happy birthday, dear Katie. Mommy & Daddy love you.