Odds & ends for the weekend

• I had kind of forgotten that Liza Minnelli is "one of us."  Then I got watching a documentary about her this week, from "American Masters" on PBS -- "Liza:  A Truly Terrific Absolutely True Story" -- and they included a whole segment about how much she had wanted to have children, her multiple miscarriages, and how much she doted on her friends' children (and, later, grandchildren).There was a lot about her life that I'd forgotten (or never knew). She's a legend for a reason. Worth a watch, if you can find it! 
• Princess Beatrice of England recently wrote for Vogue UK about the premature birth of her daughter Athena in January. 
• In The Atlantic, Ashley Parker ponders "Miscarriage and Motherhood: What having a baby taught me about the illusion of control."  (Gift link.) 
• Like I needed one more book to add to my "to-read" list....!  Nevertheless, I was intrigued by this (mostly glowing) New York Times review of "Firstborn," a pregnancy loss memoir by Lauren Christensen. (NYT gift link.)  
• Lisa Kissane grapples with the eternal question of labels: "Am I Childless, Childfree or a Proxy-Parent? And why does it even matter?" 
• In her Substack "Mad Woman," Amanda Montei ponders the "is motherhood good or bad" debate -- and a recent iteration, featuring the singer Chappell Roan. 
• The whole piece is worth a read -- but I especially appreciate that it includes a reference to women without children -- and the acknowledgement that ours is a perspective that often goes unheard:

The latest Chappell Roan pile-on highlights one aspect of this conversation that is frequently unheard: discussions about maternal representation tend to dismiss, moralize, erase, even pathologize the experiences of women without kids, and even more the experiences of queer women without kids.

...women without children are also frequently blamed for other women’s attitudes toward and experiences of motherhood, and for everything from a failing economy, progressive politics, toxic internet culture, and sociopathy (which, to be clear, occurs at a rate of 3:1 men to women). Such claims are echoed, too, in neoliberal writings, usually by white women with certain economic privileges, who claim motherhood is inherently transformative and transcendent, and that images of liberated women without kids are somehow damaging the motherhood scene.

Care, to be clear, is transformative. And in our lonely, isolated cultural moment, we need more of it. But one need not be a mother to care for other people, or even for children.

• Also on the subject of the Chappell Roan kerfuffle:  Lane Anderson from "Matriarchy Report" asks her readers, "Can we talk about how to create solidarity among women, beyond the hot takes?" 
• What I love about this post is that Anderson actually realizes the motherhood debate is not a binary (i.e., it's the best thing/worst thing). (AND she invites readers without kids to share their perspective in the comments! -- which I did!):  

...But there’s also a third story at play here that’s worth considering:

Another story of American Motherhood/Non Motherhood is the single/child-free woman who is a Childless Cat Lady, is selfish, self-centered, doesn’t get it, and is wasting her life and potential. This is embodied in this case by Chappell Roan herself.

This might be an unpopular opinion, but I actually do think it’s worth listening to what young women who don’t have children have to say about their perceptions of American Motherhood and the discourse thereof. 

• The matter of "what should I do with/will happen to my stuff when I'm gone?" weights heavily on many childless people. For me, as a genealogist, the question of what to do with all the stuff I've accumulated over years related to my family history is a particular concern. Even if none of my cousins or their kids find this stuff interesting (right now, anyway...!), it's quite possible one of THEIR kids or grandkids might. And why reinvent the wheel, right?  So much of what I've been able to build today began with a few documents carefully preserved by my grandparents & their siblings, and the stories they told me.  
• So I was pleased to read in a recent update email from the Ontario Genealogical Society (I'm a longtime member) that they are planning a new "legacy service" which would allow members to donate or bequeath their genealogical research to be digitized (for a fee) in order to preserve it and to share it with others. 
• I was thinking that if no one in my family was interested, I would donate my collection to the museum in the Minnesota county where my mother grew up (if they're interested -- and assuming the border is still open by then... (!) ). They already do a lot of family history stuff, and already have some items related to my family. 
• But it's nice to have another option to consider too.  
• Lisa Sibbett at "The Auntie Bulletin" asks a common question in the childless/free community:  "Who Will Care for You in Your Old Age, If Not Your Kids?" Jody Day's "alterkin" project is highlighted!  
• Jill Filipovic highlights a new study from the Johns Hopkins School of Medicine that shows the number of women dying after being denied life-saving and health-preserving abortions, post-Roe v Wade being overturned, is likely far higher than thought. Excerpt: 

Before the Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade and allowed Republican legislators to ban abortion in most of the states they control, the public narrative around abortion bans was simple: Make abortion illegal, and you get dangerous illegal abortions. And that remains true. But what much of the public didn’t seem to understand is that if you make abortion illegal, you get more dangerous pregnancies. 

• From the Washington Post: "Is listening to a book cheating?" (Let the arguments begin!  lol)  
• My personal viewpoint:  I wouldn't call it "cheating" -- but I find it hard to think of it as actually reading. Nothing against people who enjoy audiobooks (anything that gets people reading/enjoying books is a good thing!). Personally, I feel like I need to actually read a book to really absorb it.  
• (It's the same with podcasts: I enjoy podcasts, but I find I really have to focus my attention on what's being said -- no or minimal multi-tasking -- or else my mind will wander and then half an hour's gone by and I have no idea what I just heard!) 
• On a related note -- my L.M. Montgomery Readathon Facebook group reads & discusses LMM's books, chapter by chapter -- and each chapter is read on video by a volunteer group member. (I've done several chapter readings myself.)  I do enjoy listening to these -- and reading along with them at the same time. 
• Also in The Atlantic:  Daniel Engber writes about "The Evermaskers" -- people who remain covid-cautious, five years after the pandemic began. (Gift link.) 
• (I would describe myself as covid cautious -- I am certainly far more cognizant of the risks and (still) take more precautions than almost everyone I know, although I am not QUITE as vigilant as some of the people in the article, and have been venturing into more places recently without a mask -- so long as there aren't too many other people around.)