Is anyone planning to watch the Oscars (Academy Awards) tonight?? Oscar Night has always been huge at our house (as I've written in the past). I have not missed one since I was a kid in the early 1970s (like, about FIFTY (50) YEARS, people!!), with two partial exceptions: (1)1979, when I was a high schooler, working part-time, and so missed the first hour or so -- and (2) 1989, when I bought us tickets to the theatre -- "Phantom of the Opera" -- for the same night. We taped it on our VCR, made popcorn & watched it the next night, fast-forwarding through the commercials (which actually was not a bad way to go, lol). (It was the year of Rob Lowe, Snow White and "Proud Mary," if you know which broadcast I mean...!)
It's the only awards show I still watch faithfully every year -- BUT (and for anyone who knows me, this is HUGE) -- I am seriously contemplating putting on the PVR & watching my regular Sunday night PBS shows (My Grandparents' War and Atlantic Crossing) instead. (!!!) I have not been inside a movie theatre in more than a year (and I prefer to watch new releases in the theatre, if I can), I have barely heard of most of the nominees, and... I'm just not feeling it this year. :(
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In a kind-of-similar vein, this past week was National Infertility Awareness Week (NIAW). Every year I keep thinking I'm going to write something about it, maybe something related to the theme. And every year it goes by and I don't get it done. This year I had the time, obviously, but once again, I just wasn't feeling any motivation. Part of it is just the covid blahs, I think -- but there's more to it than that. If you think awareness of infertility as an issue is lacking, try awareness of the realities of childless/free living after infertility (among other ways to be childless) -- among both fertile & infertile people. RESOLVE, which sponsors NIAW, does offer some resources for childless/free living on its website and forums -- but its primary focus is, obviously, on helping people build families. (It also has relationships with the fertility industry that some find problematic -- see this 2016 post by Pamela at Silent Sorority, for example.)
Some CNBCers (Jobi Tyson at Childless Women/Tutum Global) and Brandi at Not So Mommy) made an effort this year to create some NIAW programming by & for CNBCers, which was nice. I'm sure it was helpful for many people, and I did watch the panel discussion yesterday, which included Jody Day of Gateway Women and Barbara Collura of RESOLVE among the speakers. But I'll admit -- like the Oscars this year -- I just couldn't muster up a lot of enthusiasm to do much else.
Infertility was and is obviously a big part of my story -- I am & always will be an infertile woman -- but as someone whose infertility journey did not end with a (living) baby... I'm ambivalent. I'm happy if my story and my blog posts can help women who are transitioning to a childless/free life after infertility -- and I think it's a story more women need to hear (especially since some 70% of fertility treatments do NOT result in a take-home baby) -- but it's not a message they're eager to hear when they're still "in the trenches."
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The New York Times had a recent article that perfectly described my current frame of mind. There's even a term for it -- "languishing."
Are you languishing, like me?