Odds & ends to end the month

• Update on my last/#MM post and my surgery dates:  as I mentioned to Mali in one of the comments on that post, the opthamologist's office called yesterday afternoon. They didn't see any issue with me having my eye surgery on July 25th as scheduled, if I had gallbladder removal surgery on July 12th. 
• I was seeing my family doctor today, following up on my recent fall and ambulance trip to the hospital, so I asked him his opinion. He didn't see any reason why I couldn't do both surgeries that close together either, and he encouraged me to go for it. 
• Of course, when I got home and spoke to the surgeon's office, July 12th was no longer available...!  :(  They offered me July 19th, but that was definitely way too close to my eye surgery on the 25th for my comfort. 
• So now I am booked for August 15th, three weeks AFTER the eye procedure. I actually feel better doing it in that order, with some time in between to recover. BUT... 
• ...this timing means I probably won't be heading west to see my family this summer -- AGAIN. This will be the third summer in a row that I've missed going there (the last because of covid, of course) -- and the fourth in the past five years. We also missed a summer 2018 trip, because we were basically on death watch for FIL, who passed away in mid-August after a cancer diagnosis that spring. :(  Summer 2019 is the only one in the past five years when we've made it "home"!  My parents will be disappointed, I know. :(  
• Theoretically we could go earlier in July, but dh thinks we shouldn't run the added risk of exposure to covid just before the surgeries, which would really throw a monkey wrench into things. :(   I suppose he's right.  We will probably go for a week or two in October around (Canadian) Thanksgiving again instead. My sister has a week off then too. 
• Bloglovin' was fine earlier this morning, but out (again!) later on. It's finally back up again this evening.      
• Amid the horror of the TV coverage on the morning after the school massacre in Ulvade, Texas, last week, one small bright spot (for me):  CNN morning news anchor Erica Hill's voice was cracking as she read a social media post from one of the bereaved parents announcing the death of his daughter. Her co-anchor, Jim Sciutto, acknowledged (in words to the effect that) "You can't help but think about your own child." But then!!  To my utter amazement, he then added "Of course, you don't have to be a parent to feel the sadness of this" (words to that effect, anyway). 
• I just about dropped my cup of tea -- it's not something those of us without children hear or have acknowledged by parents very often -- and it meant a lot to hear it. Thank you, Jim Scuitto!  :)  
• The New York Times had a story about the parents who are suing their son & his wife for not providing them with a grandchild after six years of marriage (which I previously mentioned in a post here). The grounds are "mental harassment." (!)  
• Two weeks ago, the initial story I saw said a hearing in the matter was scheduled for Monday (a few days later);  the NYT story (dated Sunday) says an initial hearing on the suit is scheduled for... Monday (i.e.,. yesterday). Either the original hearing was postponed or the Times didn't update the story? I have done some Googling and have not found any coverage of an actual hearing or outcome yet. 
• The NYT article provides some cultural context around the story that's been missing from the initial coverage I saw. "This is an Indian parent thing," the couple's sympathetic lawyer says. A local shopkeeper says that the case has been the subject of great interest among his clients, and that older people tended to sympathize with the plaintiffs.
• The NYT story links to a Times of India story that provides further details missing from the coverage I've seen to date. The father says "we decided to get him married" -- "WE," which implies to me that it may have been an arranged marriage. He also says, "My son and daughter-in-law are living in two separate cities because of their jobs, causing us immense pain." Hmmm...
• I have a LOT of questions. (I'd love to know what the conversations over THAT family dinner table have been like over the past six years...!)  Have the son & DIL actually outright refused to produce grandchildren?  Or they just... haven't procreated? (Yet?)  
• Perhaps they don't actually want to have children. (Perhaps they didn't even really want to get married, but went ahead with the wedding, just to get their parents off their case?)  
• Perhaps they do want children, but not right away. Perhaps they have other priorities right now (careers, travel, mortgage?) -- and their timeline differs from their parents'.  
• And, of course, there's always the distinct possibility that they have actually been trying to have children, without success. (Living and working in two different cities doesn't make it any easier...!) 
• Most of us here know the pain and stress of being pressured by relatives (however well-meaning) about when we're going to produce a baby.  Infertility is stressful enough without the constant comments and enquiries from family members, which is why so many of us keep any testing and treatment we're doing private. I found it difficult enough to cope with my own anxiety and disappointment and dh's, let alone anyone else's.  I can't fathom the additional stress infertile couples must be under in a highly pronatalist culture like India's. And I certainly can't fathom how awful it must be to have your own parents threatening to SUE you!! ("Produce a grandchild within the next year, or else...!")
• The son and DIL have not commented to date.  
• Arthur Brooks offered his thoughts on two ways to keep a midlife crisis at bay in the Atlantic recently. In a nutshell, they are (1) focus on what age has give you, and not what it has taken away (generativity versus stagnation), and (2) choose subtraction, not addition (i.e., focus on paring down your life -- and your stuff -- to focus on yourself and on the things that matter most to you). I thought the article was a little simplistic, but he raised some interesting points. Thoughts? 
• How can it already be JUNE??