...and so the "anniversary" cycle begins again, for the tenth time. Today is the day it all started 10 years ago (even though I had no idea at the time). Sunday, February 8, 1998, was my LMP date -- the first day of my last period before I got pregnant. The date that I recited at just about every doctor's appointment & ultrasound (& there were many...).
Again I've been looking through my datebook/diary for the week. I've gotten into the habit over the years of jotting down not just appointments and birthdays that are going to happen, but what actually did happen, and thank goodness. I've always thought I had a good memory, but there are so many details I have not remembered.
By Feb. 8th, my humungous cold sore was finally starting to heal. The Winter Olympics were underway in Nagano, Japan, and I got up at 6 a.m. (!!) to watch live coverage of the pairs short program in figure skating (the sport I follow passionately).
And my period started.
My jottings tell me that I was feeling crampy and took a two-hour nap that afternoon -- something I rarely do. We had brunch and went to the local mall, Costco & Chapters megabookstore where, as I noted, I slipped on the ice in the parking lot & fell on my butt with a thud. I do remember that (ow) -- I later liked to joke that the jolt to my system must have made the difference by shaking an egg loose from my tenacious ovaries.
What I hadn't remembered, until I looked at my datebook just now, was what a miserable period that was, even when compared to the heavy one that preceded it, 33 days earlier. I went into the office Monday morning, Feb. 9th, but I felt so crampy & nauseous & generally ill (not to mention stiff & sore from my fall)(the note in my book says "BLAH!"), I basically turned around & took the next available train home again. I didn't bother to wait for a bus but took a taxi home from the train station. I must have been feeling pretty lousy, because I stayed home the next day too, and both days, I took two-hour naps. I only get 8 sick days a year (three of which can be used as "personal obligation days") so I must have been feeling pretty crappy to use up two sick days right off the bat so early in the year.
That Thursday night, we babysat dh's cousin's two little girls, who were almost 7 & 4 at the time, while their parents attended a parent-teacher interview. They live only a few blocks away from us, and we used to be so much closer... (I feel a future blog post coming on!).
Friday was a Friday the 13th. Was this an omen?
It's funny how people keep all their journals and go back over them. I actually have my old journals, but I put them in a box. I'm actually scared to look at them - I hate to be reminded of the past I think - cause I can't undo anything.
ReplyDeleteOh, those anniversaries are so hard to revisit. They are etched into our mind so deeply that it's like no time has passed since the actual events occurred...they are responsible for forging us into who we are today.
ReplyDeleteIt is my time, too, to remember our lost child. I mark it also with the Nagano Olympics.
ReplyDeleteI wish I could say something to make it all better for you...
You know Lori - we have often remarked on our similar anniversary dates. While you mark your beginning on this date, I marked one of many endings on the same day in 2002. This time though - you were there to help hold my hand. I have always believed and found comfort in the thought of your angel Katie hovering and looking over my wee angels. That would be so like her mother!
ReplyDelete