Sunday, May 12, 2013

Voldemort Day 2013

(Voldemort Day = The Day That Shall Not Be Named.  My preferred label. You all know why, lol....)
  • Is it over yet? :p  ;)
  • The day here has been cold, grey, windy & rainy (altnough I am hearing reports of both hail & snow, not too far from us). Matched my mood. :p
  • It's not like it hurts so terribly much anymore... it just makes me tired. Very, very tired. I can only read so many Facebook posts wishing people a happy you-know-what-day and photos of pancake breakfasts and presents received before I just want to turn the computer off and dive under the covers and stay there all day. :p 
  • I didn't, though. Although I did wind up hiding out in the dark at the movies (my preferred strategy of avoidance, lol) -- "The Great Gatsby," which I also just finished reading. Review of both movie & book to come...
  • CBS Sunday Morning had numerous topical stories, of course. :p  But, surprise!  The lead story was about childless by choice couples. (Although it started off --for contrast's sake, I suppose -- with the infamous Duggars of "19 Kids and Counting.")  On the one hand, I really, really wish they had at least nodded to the fact that there is a vast grey area between the Duggars and couples who make a conscious, deliberate choice not to have children. On the other hand, I was amazed that they even tackled the subject on Voldemort Day at all, let alone gave it the lead story spot in the lineup. Overall, I thought it was a reasonably well balanced examination of the subject (at least, as well examined as you can get in just a couple of minutes). There was no video posted on the site (at least yet), but here's the story stemming from that item.
  • A huge thank you to the deadbabymama friend on Facebook who posted a link to this article, "For Women Who Dread Mother's Day." It was exactly, exactly what I needed to hear/read today. Sample passage:
"We are a sisterhood, all of us who just want the day to pass. We are a sisterhood of women who have learned so much the hard way, who know that life doesn't hold guarantees, who in our better moments understand that love isn't about what you get, but what you give... Sisters, you aren't alone. There are vast numbers of us. Maybe that's what we can do, too: reach out our hands to each other--in real ways, in cyber-ways, in any way--and say: I understand. I stand with you. This day shall pass, life goes on, and there are always, always reasons to be grateful."

Post-Voldemort Day ramblings 2012

You-Know-What Day (2011)

Mother's Day 2010

Pre-MDay 2009

Mother's Day 2009 (Baptism)

Mother's Day 2008

Pre-MDay 2008


  1. I really like the article from It summarizes so well why this one day is so painful for so many. I think a lot of people actively chose to ignore this, naively assuming that those who find this day difficult are simply selfish. Yet the author is absolutely right that it's far from that simple.

    The CBS piece confuses me. Why start a piece about childfree by choice with the Duggars? A sloppy connection for sure.

    Thinking of you today, Loribeth. Wishing you peace.

  2. I loved the article, it was exactly right. And, given the negative reaction to my post, I also appreciate your support. Thank you.

  3. Good article! Thanks for posting about it.

    I was really upset today about a Facebook post made by a friend "without them I am nothing". So those of us who are childless not by choice are nothing for our entire lives??? Pissed me off.

    Glad you survived today!

  4. Oh, LOVE the quote from the Boston article. Now on to reading it. I actually logged off from FB once I felt that there were too many mentions of Voldemort Day. Life was more peaceful that way. :-D

  5. It annoyed me when some of the Mother's Day posts on FB stung yesterday. It also surprised me how many of those I am friends with and who I know experienced various levels of infertility made no mention of it or others who didn't get their happy ending. The couple who did mention it made it sting a little less.
    And seriously my word verification is fertile? WTF?

  6. Thanks for this post! By the way I'm Claire from the Philippines, and I am one of you. I've really been dreading this voldemort day, as you call it :) (I love it) but thankfully the celebration here in my country is not as grand as it used to be, maybe because almost everyone is preoccupied by the elections. I did not open my FB, I knew my newsfeed will be flooded by things we hate seeing every now and then. Thank God that day was over, I'm back to normal now and reading blogs like yours. have a nice day!

  7. "Love isn't about what you get, but what you give" ... exactly.

    Thanks for the comment on my post ... I really wish people would do this day differently, for *everyone's* sake. Or maybe just get rid of it entirely. There are so many countries that celebrate Women's Day (when one could celebrate mothers AND the other important women in our lives) ... maybe it's time we started to do that, too.