All in the family

Other childless people I've met tend (mostly) to fall into two camps when it comes to genealogy.  One: (like me) they tend to be the keepers of the family history (in part, perhaps, because they/we often wind up being the default caretakers of the elders in the family, spend more time with them and hear all the stories, etc.).  

Or:  they shy away from the subject. The reminders that their particular branch of the family ends here can be very painful. They don't feel like this stuff applies to them.  

Understandable!  

Not only are we reminded of our childlessness by the mere existence of a family tree, I have actually heard from some childless women that (sadly) some misguided family tree keepers make things worse by ONLY documenting the family lines that continue -- i.e., only people who have children get included. (!)  Imagine being told (as a few women have told me) that you've been left off the family tree -- your OWN FAMILY TREE!! -- because you don't have children.  OUCH, OUCH, OUCH.  As a childless  genealogist, I was horrified.  

So I've been gratified to sit in on a few genealogy webinars recently, where the speakers have advocated for a very different approach. 

Traditional genealogy has focused on finding your direct ancestors -- i.e., parents, grandparents, great-grandparents, and so on, as far back as you can go. Obviously this is important -- but it's a pretty narrow focus that misses out on a lot of people, a lot of great stories, and a lot of information. 

More and more often, I'm hearing about the importance of identifying and documenting ALL the descendants you can (whether they're married with children or not). There are a number of reasons why. To name a few:  

• The more descendants you can identify and document, the more proof you will have that you're researching the right family (especially when you have a common surname).  
• You can cross-check the documented information for each child/sibling in a family to confirm and verify (and increase the likelihood of finding a critical missing piece of information, or perhaps something you hadn't known about before). 
• Finding all the documentation you can for ALL the people in your family that you can increases the likelihood of finding some great information -- not just the dry facts, but photos, letters, stories -- things that will add colour to your family story and make your ancestors come alive for you. 
• And finally (and this is my own personal point) -- it's just the right thing to do. We all need to feel included. Especially when it comes to our families.   

As I think I mentioned in the genealogy-related webinar I co-hosted last year with Michael Hughes during World Childless Week, some of the childless women in my family tree led/lead pretty interesting lives. One of my favourite blog posts that I've written, from 2014, was about a childless great-great-great aunt who saved letters and scrapbooks that have been invaluable to our family history research.  The kicker being that she was adopted into the family and was not a genetic relative at all!  

Other genealogy-related posts here.