Wednesday, August 26, 2020

Odds & ends

  • I watched another Zoom event with Lyz Lenz last Thursday night, sponsored by the bookstore Politics & Prose. She was interviewed about her new book, "Belabored" (which I reviewed here) by Soraya Chemaly, author of another great book, "Rage Becomes Her" (reviewed here).  It was a pretty lively & interesting conversation, and even included a question related to infertility, as well as a few nods to the fact that not everyone wants to be pregnant, or can get pregnant when they want to, or becomes a mother through pregnancy. But I was somewhat annoyed by the P&P event host, who said not once -- not twice -- but THREE TIMES!! -- that at the end, they were going to talk about their birth stories, "because we all have them, right?"  (She said that exact phrase THREE TIMES -- "we all have them!")  Ummm, WRONG. We do not. (And some of us have them, but we all know that nobody wants to hear ours...!)
    • Thankfully, it was only a joke (??)/empty threat -- they didn't tell their birth stories at all (no time, for one thing!). But it was still annoying.
  • In a similar vein, this article popped up in my blog reader from "Let Grow," which generally publishes articles about free-range parenting: "We Need the Village Now More Than Ever."  I don't disagree with that sentiment -- but my heart sank a little (& my childless hackles rose, lol) as I read the author's fond remembrances of how, as new mom, casseroles were dropped off at her door and friends volunteered to hold the baby while she showered. "It was a great example of families helping families," she says, and then goes on to describe similar offers of help from her son's classmates' moms as she struggled to keep things together during the early days of the pandemic while her husband was away. 
"Parents are forming learning pods to support one another as they navigate uncharted waters. We are sharing grocery trips and delivering dinners or baked goods. We’re mowing each other’s lawns and doing dump runs. We’re sharing online resources and tips for home learning. There are childcare co-ops and walking buses to get to schools if they open. We are all giving what we have to give and grateful to accept what others can provide."

This is all really, really great. But in all the talk about "it takes a village" and "families helping families," I'm hoping that someone is extending the concept of "family" to include their single and childless friends and relatives, the elderly, the disabled and others who may also be isolated and struggling -- with simple loneliness, if not material needs. They (we) are part of the village too. (They/we like & appreciate casseroles too, lol.)  It shouldn't just be moms helping moms and parents helping parents. 
  • COVID-19 cases in my home province of Manitoba, which have remained quite low these past six months, have suddenly spiked -- 72 new cases on Sunday alone!  There have also been two cases in the small town where my parents live (rumoured to be a couple my parents know, about the same age as them, who attend my parents' church -- no idea where they might have picked it up).  School has yet to start there, too. Here I've been fretting about rates here and the inevitable spike once school begins, never considering that things might take a turn for the worse there too. :(   My sister has been calling my parents to lecture them about the importance of wearing their masks. (Late Sunday night, I heard they'd been made mandatory in all indoor public spaces there.) And I've been starting to grapple with the very real possibility that I might not make it home for Christmas for the first time in my life... :(  :(  :(  

3 comments:

  1. "I'm hoping that someone is extending the concept of 'family' to include their single and childless friends and relatives, the elderly, the disabled and others..."

    Of course they are! All those people are also expected to bring casseroles, provide free childcare, and fawn over the hardworking parents. Bonus points if they offer to fund the kids' college education. It takes a village!

    ...Oh, oh wait, did you mean parents extending help and support to the non-parents around them? Get outta here!

    (Sorry, I'm just salty. I recently had someone tell me, straight-faced, that because I don't have children I must have lots of extra time and resources to share with the parents around me. I laughed at them.)

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    1. LOL, Megan! Great point!! Yes, it would be nice to be on the receiving end of the casseroles once in a while, wouldn't it?

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  2. If I lived near you, I'd bring you a casserole! (Actually, probably more likely to be a mild curry, but same idea. lol)

    Ugh, that event host clearly didn't listen to the conversation, did she? How annoying. This is the problem, I think. Even though we speak out more often now, there is still a large proportion of the population who can't register realities that are different to theirs.

    I'm sorry about Christmas, and I hope your parents adjust to mask-wearing and new rules. (I say "hope" because I know elderly parents find adjusting difficult!) I'm trying to keep my expectations low to minimise disappointment. At one stage I was hoping for international travel (necessary to see my husband's siblings as well as all but two nieces and nephews and great-nephews) in 2022 - but now, we don't know if international travel will ever resume in quite the same way.

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