Bye bye, Alan...

(BCR fans may recognize the allusion in the title to their hit "Bye Bye Baby," a remake of the classic Four Seasons song.)  ;)  

Alan Longmuir died yesterday. The name probably means nothing to most of you out there, but for me, he was part of one of my most integral teenage experiences: the 2-3 years of my life that revolved around the Bay City Rollers. As when David Cassidy died last November, a little piece of my youth, and my heart, died along with him.

Alan wasn't the most prominent member of the group, nor my personal favourite (that would be Stuart "Woody" Wood ;) ) (interestingly, nothing I've read indicates that Woody & his wife have children...) but he was part of the group, nevertheless, and was in fact its founder. Alan started the Rollers (then called The Saxons) with his younger brother Derek in the 1960s. He left the group in 1976, just as their fame was peaking (he was gone by the time I saw the Rollers in August that year -- my very first concert! -- FORTY-TWO YEARS AGO!! -- replaced by a 17-year-old Irish boy named Ian Mitchell). I understand he didn't get along with their tyrant of a manager, and he was having difficulty dealing with the stresses of fame. He was 28 years old -- five years older than the next-oldest Roller, Eric Faulkner -- and at the time, 28 seemed positively ancient to 15-year-old me & my friends. :)  Even now, I see fans commenting on social media, "He was SEVENTY??!!"  -- like most of us aren't in our 50s now ourselves, lol. ;)

I've written about my Rollermania days a few times here on the blog, including last summer, when I found some relics of those days in the closet at my mother's house -- things I'd once dreamed of showing my daughter. Ah, youth.

Les McKeown was the Rollers' frontman, but on the rare occasions that Alan sang lead, it was a delight. Here for your viewing & listening pleasure, in all their '70s glory, the Bay City Rollers with Alan singing lead on "Rock & Roll Honeymoon."  (I was humming this song constantly during the week of my nephew's wedding this spring.)

Rest in peace, Alan, and thanks for the great memories.

MicroblogMondays: "The Handmaid's Tale, Episode 11: Holly"

After watching each episode of "The Handmaid's Tale," I like to Google reviews to see what the critics had to say, and whether they picked up on the same things I did (or saw something that I didn't). (It also gives me a chance to wind down a little before heading off to bed!): 

This paragraph from Vulture's review of Season 2, Episode 11 (which I watched last night) had me silently fist-pumping (so as not to wake up dh, lol): 

[Fred & Serena's] argument is the grand unburdening of the anger and resentment that’s been brewing in their relationship for years. And underneath it all has been Serena’s desire for a baby. It’s a sharp indictment of our parent-centric society, of the idea that successful adulthood necessarily includes parenting. Despite her prominence, her beauty, and her wealth, Serena actively abandoned her intellectual freedom — and helped oppress an entire nation’s worth of other women and dissenters — for the promise of a child.

Also: Did anyone else clue in that the voice on Radio Free America that Offred/June heard in the car was Oprah??

Did you watch? What did you think? 

You can find more of this week's #MicroblogMondays posts here.

Right now (Canada Day edition)

Right now... (an occasional meme, alternating from time to time with "The Current")

Reading: Between books right now. Year-to-date, I've finished 13 books (out of my Goodreads 2018 Reading Challenge goal of 24 books). Halfway there at the halfway point of 2018!! 

Recent purchase: The Race to Save the Romanovs by Helen Rappaport. 

Watching: The Handmaid's Tale," which continues to be gripping, extremely well done television. Just a few more episodes to go in season 2...!  (Episode 11 of 13 tonight!)  

On the big screen, we've recently seen (& enjoyed) "Ocean's 8" and "The Incredibles 2." 

Listening:  To a podcast by Civilla Morgan, who runs a site called Childless Not By Choice, interviewing Gateway Women's Jody Day. Listen here! 

Following:  Tweets & stories from the staff of the Capital-Gazette in Annapolis, Maryland, where five staff members were murdered this past week by a nut with a gun & a grudge. :(   And yet, they are still publishing a damn paper. :)  Journalists have been my heroes since the days of Woodward & Bernstein (maybe even earlier). The Capital-Gazette survivors show why journalists are still my heroes. :)  (NOT the "enemy of the people," as some people (cough cough) would have you believe... :p ) 

Drinking/Eating:  Dinner tonight: baked chicken breasts with peas & rice. Drinking lots of water this weekend, as we're in the middle of a heat wave...! 

Wearing: As I've gotten older, I've felt more self-conscious about wearing shorts in public in the summertime (although I wear them constantly around the house). I tend to wear capris instead. But I've been making an exception this weekend...!!  (Current temps: 34C & 43C humidex -- that's 93F & 109F.  And it was even hotter yesterday!)  

Trying:  To get better about meal planning. I found a cheap little magnetic dry-erase board (sticks to the refrigerator) with seven boxes on it, one for each day of the week. Not every slot gets a dinner plan written into it at the beginning of the week (although Fridays are usually lentils and Saturdays we usually eat out) -- but we're at least trying to be a little more pro-active in thinking about it, so that it doesn't get to be 4 p.m. and we're staring blankly at each other saying, "So, what do you want to do about dinner?"  (How about you? -- any meal planners out there? Any tips to share?) 

Buying (besides books, lol):  A cute new foldable/crushable straw sunhat from Zara, in anticipation of our trip to the beach this weekend (that didn't happen -- thank goodness!)  I'm not very good about wearing hats or remembering to put on sunscreen when I'm outside for more than a few minutes, but am trying to develop some better habits as I age. ;)  

Wanting:  Would a break from the extreme heat & humidity be asking too much?? 

Loving:  (Despite the current heat wave) Being able to go outside in shorts or capris & sandals -- no jacket, boots, gloves, hat, scarf, etc., required!! YAY!! 

Debating: Whether to head home for a week or so to visit my parents by myself later this summer (late July or August), without dh (who understandably does not want to leave his father right now). Or wait & maybe go for (Canadian) Thanksgiving (in October). 

Anticipating:  Our wedding anniversary this coming week -- we have tickets to see an all-Canadian production of "Come From Away" downtown!

Feeling:  Extremely proud & thankful to be a Canadian... albeit a little depressed over the general state of the world right now... :(  

TGFSIL!!*

*  Thank Goodness for Sisters-in-Law!! 

BIL called yesterday. I guess SIL told him flatly that SHE didn't want to go on Saturday either.  Like me, she thought that getting up at the crack of dawn & driving more than an hour just to sit outside for hours on end in 46C humidex weather -- forecasters are calling it "the most significant heat event in years" -- is the definition of insanity. 

So we're not going after all!!  -- we'll go to visit FIL (as usual) instead. (What a relief!!)  

She's getting a big hug when I see her tomorrow -- I owe her!! ;)   

*** *** ***

On the subject of hot weather -- would you believe our condo building's air conditioning unit conked out, sometime between Wednesday evening & Thursday morning??  (The cooling/heating unit is centrally located;  each unit can control its own temperature (to a point...) & has an individual fan coil unit & air filter.)  I kind of THOUGHT it was feeling a little "close" on Thursday morning, even looked at the thermostat, but it was 74F, which is what it should be, so I didn't think much of it -- until, as we were heading out to the mall for a few hours, we ran into a neighbour in the elevator, who informed us the a/c for the whole building was out. Not exactly what you want to hear, heading into a weekend where the temperatures are going to be as hot as (if not hotter than) Baghdad!!  

When we got back home a few hours later, there were signs up by the elevators saying the a/c was out, service technicians had been called but they didn't know when things would be running again (great). The temp in our unit had gone up to 76F, and increased to 79F before we went to bed. The fan was running, circulating air. It wasn't hot air, but it wasn't cold air either.  And there are only three vents for the entire 874-square-foot unit, one in each main room/space. 

The good news: the indoor temp dropped two degrees to 77F overnight, and the a/c kicked back in around 9:30 this morning. The bad news? It's already so hot out there (38C humidex today) that even though the a/c is spitting out cold air once again, the temp merely held at 77F for most of the day -- and then actually went UP a degree to 78F in the late afternoon. It's still 78F!! although the humidity has dropped, from 63% this morning to 56% right now. Here's hoping it will drop a few more degrees overnight, because tomorrow is going to be a scorcher... 

"Why Have Kids?" by Jessica Valenti

"Most people get flowers when they give birth -- I got a two-pound baby and a failing liver," reads the first sentence of Jessica Valenti's 2012 book, "Why Have Kids?: A New Mom Explores the Truth About Parenting and Happiness."  (She had me at hello!)

Unlike some authors exploring the "why have/should I have kids?" question, Valenti is a parent:  as the opening of her book suggests, her daughter Layla was born prematurely and spent time in a NICU after Valenti developed pre-ecclampsia & HELLP syndrome. This experience left the author with a case of post-traumatic stress disorder, and the increasing realization that modern motherhood is not all it's cracked up to be.

"This was not what I expected," she confesses. "The seductive lie that parenting will fulfill our lives blinds Americans to the reality of having kids."

Valenti explores the disconnect that exists between the popular, idealized images of parenting and motherhood, and the cold hard reality -- between the lip service paid to the importance of motherhood in our society, and the sad lack of support provided.  Some of the wide range of topics discussed include whether having kids makes you happy, whether women are "natural parents," whether motherhood is "the hardest job in the world" (and whether it's actually a job or a relationship), working moms vs stay-at-home moms, attachment parenting and breastfeeding, and much more.

There is even an entire chapter devoted to those who choose NOT to have children, and some of the reasons why.  I do wish Valenti had given at least a nod to those of us who have endured infertility and/or are living childless NOT by choice, and the impact that pronatalism has had on our decisions -- both the decision to endure treatment & losses in pursuing our dream of having children, and, ultimately, the decision to walk away from parenthood, in the face of overwhelming societal pressure not to give up.  (Infertility is mentioned, but mostly within the context of reproductive choice.)  Still, there is a lot here that I think many of us will relate to, even if we wound up living without children.

It's not a long book, but Valenti covers a lot of ground here, and in a thorough, readable way. I gave this book four stars on Goodreads. (A preview of "Why Have Kids?" is available through Goodreads.)

(I lucked into an e-copy of this book for $1.99 (US) via Amazon... I have a Kobo for an e-reader, not a Kindle, but I can still read Kindle books via an app on both my cellphone &/or my laptop. :)  I previously read & reviewed Valenti's memoir, "Sex Object," here.)

This was book #13 that I've read so far in 2018, bringing me to 54% of my 2018 Goodreads Reading Challenge goal of 24 books.  I am (for the monent, anyway...!) AHEAD of schedule -- by not just one but TWO books!! -- to meet my goal!  :)  

Tuesday odds & ends

• Today was my annual Pap/checkup in the city with Dr. Ob-Gyn. The province decided a few years ago that most women only need Paps done every 3 years (= they will only pay for one every 3 years, under most circumstances) -- but since I had an abnormal Pap in the past (albeit almost 20 years ago...!), I can still get one done annually. And if that didn't qualify me, I think the fact that I am 57-frickin-years-old and still getting fairly regular visits from Aunt Flo would qualify me for a visit, don't you??  ;)  
• It is exactly 20 years since I first became Dr. Ob-Gyn's patient, albeit for very different reasons (i.e., my pregnancy with Katie). He saw me through that pregnancy -- and its awful aftermath -- did some infertility testing for me, got me a referral to an RE, and has done my Pap every year since then. As he looked through my folder today, he remarked, "That's 20 years!"  Yep. He still has the same nurse & same office manager too. I am going to miss them all. Because... 
• ...he told me he is retiring next year. :(  He said I should still be able to get in one more visit before he goes. I hope so. I am going to miss him, and his staff.  I imagine my family dr will do my Paps for me in the future. 
• Once again, he told me he didn't think my (very) delayed menopause was anything to worry about. He said I'm definitely on the far end of the spectrum (!) -- but still on the spectrum -- and he didn't notice anything during the exam or in what I told him about my periods to give him concern. 
• The place was packed with pregnant women/couples, but to be honest, I barely gave it a thought this time -- even though it WAS 20 years. Progress!!   
• Afterwards, I went SHOPPING!!  ;)  
• One of dh's cousins from Italy is visiting for a couple of weeks, along with her newlywed husband. (Everyone wants to spend their honeymoon with a couple dozen relatives in Canada, right??)  There was a big family get-together to welcome them last Saturday. This Saturday, the cousins are planning to spend the day at a lakeside park/beach/campground with kids, boats & barbecues. Reasons why I am not entirely enthusiastic about this prospective outing: 
• I love dh's family, and these gatherings can be fun... once in a while. ;)  But we just saw them all last week. I don't understand or speak Italian (and with the cousins from Italy here, there will be lots of Italian spoken, especially if the aunts & uncles come too...) -- and, of course, since a lot of the conversation I CAN hear & understand is focused on the kids...! -- I often find myself tuning out & getting a little bored.  
• It's going to be the Saturday on a long weekend (Canada Day) just after school's ended, so the park is bound to be packed... so we will need to be there early to snag picnic tables, parking spots, etc.. The park opens at 8 a.m., and it's more than an hour's drive from here... so BIL is picking us up around 6:30 a.m. (!!!).  (I said, "Can't we let the cousins go stake out a spot & just show up later??"  They all live a lot closer to the park than we do...!) 
• Today is day 44 & I've had PMS symptoms over the past few days -- meaning it's entirely possible Aunt Flo might show up, with her impeccable sense of timing...!  :p 
• And finally:  Saturday's forecast: 35C (that's 95F) with a projected humidex of 46C (almost 115F). :p  'Nuff said. :p  
• Dh went to visit FIL yesterday, but he slept almost the entire time dh was there... as he did when dh last visited. StepMIL says he is eating better lately, though, which is good to hear.   
• My own father asked me (again) when I talked to them this weekend if I knew when or whether we were coming home this summer. I told him I just didn't know. :(  

#MicroblogMondays: When life meets art

(SPOILER ALERT)  

The television adaptation of "The Handmaid's Tale" continues to enthrall -- and depress.  One of the things that most amazes me is how closely the TV show is reflecting current events.

Last week (season 2, episode 9, "Smart Power), the Commander & his wife paid an official visit to Canada -- and were asked to leave early by the Canadian government, when letters surfaced that made clear the human rights abuses endured by the handmaids and others oppressed by the Gilead regime.  This episode aired just after the current U.S. president left a G-7 meeting in Quebec, launched a trade war against my country, and made disparaging remarks about our prime minister.

This week (season 2 episode 10, "The Last Ceremony"), June/Offred was finally, briefly, reunited with her daughter Hannah, who was torn from her arms in the very first episode of the show as the family tried to flee Gilead to Canada. As I watched (& sobbed) as Hannah was torn from her arms again, after a brief 10-minute visit, sobbing "Mommy!"  I could not help but think of the families who are being torn apart right now, simply for seeking asylum at the U.S./Mexico border, as they flee the violence in their own countries. The trees outside the house where June meets Hannah are bare & there is snow on the ground -- meaning the episode was filmed several months ago -- but the subject matter could not be more topical.

Margaret Atwood, who wrote the book the TV series is based on, has said there is nothing in "The Handmaid's Tale" that hasn't happened somewhere in the world, at some time in history. The book was written more than 30 years ago but as the television adaptation is showing, it's sadly more relevant than ever....

You can find more of this week's #MicroblogMondays posts here.