"Lips Unsealed" by Belinda Carlisle

I bought the Go-Go's first album, Beauty and the Beat, early in the spring of 1982, when I was a university student. The title and the cover art played up the novelty factor -- an all-girl band, imagine that!! -- but these chicks weren't just pretty faces -- they wrote & played their own songs -- and they were great songs, too. Their frothy, hook-laden, punk-pop sound was intoxicating -- especially for a girl like me, who was raised in the '60s and '70s on a message of female empowerment and hungry for role models. 

Belinda Carlisle was the cute & perky frontwoman who got the most attention and, after the band broke up, had the most successful solo career. But privately, she was battling a lot of demons: the breakup of her parents' marriage and a lifelong struggle with her weight demolished her self-esteem and led to a 30-year struggle -- 30 YEARS!! -- with addiction to alcohol and drugs, along with a tendency to reckless and sometime life-endangering behaviour.  In her 2010 memoir, "Lips Unsealed," Carlisle admits that while the other Go-Go's wrote songs and worked hard to hone their craft as musicians, she would often just show up to sing after snorting vast quantities of cocaine.  No wonder there was some internal friction.

There are some fun stories here about the early punk movement in Los Angeles, the birth of the Go-Go's, and Belinda's encounters with various other musicians and celebrities -- for example, the Police, with whom they toured, Rod Stewart, INXS... But like many such memoirs (Chrissie Hynde's recent memoir, which I reviewed here, comes to mind), the drugs & drinking become tedious to read about after awhile. Each time Carlisle would describe a new low in her drug-induced behaviour -- snorting cocaine in the bathroom of her young son's school, for example -- or getting lectured on her drug habit by John Belushi (!!!seriously!!!) -- I would think, "OK, this MUST be the point where she finally decides to turn her life around." Nope. :p  She denies the rumour that she did cocaine during her pregnancy -- but she does admit to having a glass of wine every day during that time. Stuff like that can be hard to read for those of us who have struggled to get & stay pregnant.

Eventually, however, she did become sober, with the support of her incredibly patient husband and son, a life-changing trip to India, spiritualism and yoga.

If you're a fan, you might enjoy this. It had its moments, but not enough of them for me to give it an enthusiastic recommendation.

This was the final book that I completed in 2015, over the Christmas holidays -- #27.  Not bad!  

*** *** ***

One of my favourite Go-Go's songs, below. :)  I used to put on this album when I was living at home with my parents, post-graduate school but pre-wedding, and riding my mom's exercise bike in the morning. (This, and Billy Idol's "Rebel Yell" album, lol. Always got me pedalling faster...!) ;)

Book: "Rosemary: The Hidden Kennedy Daughter" by Kate Clifford Larson

I've read many books about the Kennedy family over the years, so I was familiar with the story of Rosemary, Joe & Rose Kennedy's third child and oldest daughter: born with "intellectual disabilities" that were carefully hidden from the public, presented at court in front of the king and queen of England along with her mother & sister in 1938, lobotomized at age 23 in a botched operation orchestrated by her father, and then whisked away to spend the rest of her long life (she died in 2005 at age 86) in seclusion in the care of nuns at a convent in Wisconsin.

Long overshadowed by her more famous parents & siblings, Rosemary has finally been given a well-deserved turn in the spotlight by Kate Clifford Larson in her new book, Rosemary: The Hidden Kennedy Daughter. The book is full of new details, material and insights about Rosemary, her life and times. Larson puts the reader in Rosemary's shoes, reminding us what it must have been like to grow up in the highly competitive Kennedy family, but unable to keep up with your siblings and meet the extremely high expectations that your parents had for their children. She also reminds us what it meant to be "mentally retarded" (the term then used) in the early part of the 20th century: to have a person like Rosemary in your family was considered shameful, and there were very few resources, programs, or schools to support these children and their families. Of course, the wealthy Kennedys were far better equipped than most people to offer Rosemary every advantage they could find to help her -- a succession of private schools, camps, lessons and paid companions -- but at the same time, they strove to present a picture of normalcy, carefully guarding Rosemary's secret from the public, so as not to damage the family's reputation and social and political prospects. 

As she grew older, Rosemary's frustrations manifested in increasingly rebellious and even violent behaviour. The most beautiful of all the Kennedy sisters, her parents feared she would be easy prey for unscrupulous men.  This led Joe Kennedy to decide -- without consulting his wife!! -- to subject Rosemary to a lobotomy, which was then a fairly new and untested procedure that was supposed to "calm" her. When it was over, Rosemary was reduced to a shell of her former self, physically disabled with the mental capacity of a two-year-old. What happened to Rosemary was not openly discussed within the family;  she just disappeared. Her mother did not visit her for 20 years (when she did, Rosemary was clearly furious). Older brother John paid her a private visit her during the 1960 presidential campaign. Gradually, her siblings began to understand what had happened to her, and to re-integrate her into the family. When she died in 2005, it was with her surviving brother and sisters around her.

Beyond Rosemary, her next-younger surviving sister, Eunice Kennedy Shriver, emerges as the heroine of the story: after her father's stroke, and as her mother aged, she assumed responsibility for her sister's care. Inspired in part by Rosemary, Eunice became well known as a tireless advocate for children's health and disability issues, and as founder of the Special Olympics. Senator Ted Kennedy, the youngest Kennedy sibling, was also well known for championing legislation that improved the lives of Americans living with disabilities.

This book is a reminder of how much things have changed in a very short time for people with disabilities -- and how much the Kennedy family, and Rosemary, had to do with that. It's a sad but important story that deserves to be told, and Larson has done an admirable job of bringing this long-neglected member of the famous Kennedy family out of the shadows.

This was book #26 that I've read so far in 2015.

"N or M?" by Agatha Christie

I'm on an Agatha Christie kick lately. ;)  The second "Partners in Crime" novel by Christie to be filmed for television was "N or M?" and, as usual, I wanted to try to get the book read before part one of the TV adaptation was broadcast earlier this week on Bravo here in Canada. I started it just before part one aired, and finished it a few days later. Parts two & three of the TV show are still to come. :)

"N or M?" is another adventure featuring Tommy & Tuppence -- the same couple from "The Secret Adversary." "The Secret Adversary" took place in post-WWI Britain; "N or M" picks up some 20 years later. It's 1940, the Second World War is in full swing, and Britain is expecting a Nazi invasion at any time. Speculation is rampant about "the Fifth Column" and German spies lurking everywhere.

The Beresfords are now a long-married, middle-aged couple and the parents of young adult twins (a boy & a girl, both involved in the war). Their old friend Mr. Carter enlists Tommy's help:  British intelligence believes there are two Nazi spies operating out of a quiet seaside boarding house, laying the groundwork for an imminent invasion of Britain.  Who among the staff and guests are they?  (Of course, Tuppence finds out what he's up to and gets in on the action...!)

By the end of the book, I had figured out the identity of at least one of the spies. But, in true Christie fashion, there were still enough twists & turns and surprises to keep things interesting. The ending, with Tommy & Tuppence out for dinner & dancing with their adult children, is rather amusing, although beware! -- there is a groaner of an ALI angle to the story at the 11th hour. :p

As I said, I've only seen the first of three parts of the TV adaptation of "N or M?"  As with "The Secret Adversary," the producers seem to have taken a lot of liberties with Christie's story:  the action has shifted to the Cold War years of the 1950s, and instead of fending off a looming invasion, the Beresfords are now trying to locate a nuclear bomb. Somehow, it's not quite as exciting as a looming Nazi invasion.

Unfortunately, it seems that others agree with my assessment: "Partners in Crime" has been cancelled by the BBC, after just these two adaptations. It's been fun (re)reading the adventures of Tommy & Tuppence, though, and I may still carry on with the remaining volumes, even if there's no longer an impending TV episode to serve as a reading incentive. :)

*** *** ***

Side note: I started reading this book shortly after the events that unfolded in Paris on Friday, Nov. 13th.  Among the story's prime suspects is a young German man, a refugee from Nazi persecution whose (non-Jewish but critical of Hitler) family is now in a concentration camp. Imagine my reaction when I started reading & found a few exchanges like this:

"...You take my word for it, this refugee business is dangerous. If I had my way I'd intern the lot of them. Safety first."  

"A bit drastic, perhaps."  

"Not at all. War's war. And I've got my suspicions of Master Carl... He's a Nazi -- that's what he is -- a Nazi." 

As the French say, "Plus ca change, plus ca meme chose." (The more things change, the more they stay the same...).

(There's also a few shots against the Irish throughout the book. Full disclosure: my family background is 1/4 Irish. ;)  )

*** *** ***

This was book #25 that I've read to date in 2015.

Punk rock reading

(Me, as a 19-year-old university student in my dorm room, going to a punk rock social (dance), February 1980, and trying to look appropriately sullen & smouldering, lol. You can't see it, but I'm wearing safety pins in my ears -- carefully sterilized in rubbing alcohol (I wasn't THAT much of a punk...!) -- instead of earrings. My sister was visiting for the weekend & took this photo with her new Nikon SLR camera, & there must have been some static on the lens, because there is this cool lightning burst effect happening all around me -- which seemed kind of appropriate in the context of the event, lol.  Photo & caption previously used in this post from June 24, 2009: "Pat Benatar, I wasn't.")

Around the time I was in high school in the late 1970s, with my boy-band phase on the wane, we started hearing about a strange new movement in the British music and fashion world called punk rock. I asked my British penpal about it, and she obliged by sending me a tape with the Sex Pistols' "Pretty Vacant" on it.

"Is this a joke?" I remember one of my friends saying at the time. It didn't sound much like music to us. It was raw and angry and dischordant. (Of course, we'd been listening to Fleetwood Mac and the Eagles and Steely Dan (not to mention the aforementioned boy bands, lol)... the Sex Pistols were like a bucket of cold water in the face, by comparison.)  The musicians and their followers LOOKED angry, with their spiky hairdos and spiky jewelry, smudged makeup and torn clothing held together with safety pins. It was scary -- but fascinating at the same time, particularly to us teenagers from conformist smalltown Prairie Canada. (How conformist, you ask?  As an example: it was a Very Big Deal to wear anything other than jeans to school or one of our school dances. "Dressing up" meant wearing your corduroy pants ("cords") instead of denim -- and you'd only do it if at least two of your friends agreed to do it too, lol.) 

Needless to say, the Sex Pistols never got much airplay on the radio stations I listened to. By the time I graduated from high school & entered university, though, I was enjoying, if not hard core punk rock, then its slightly more palatable cousin, New Wave. Among the bands I listened to at that time -- late 1970s/early 1980s -- was the Pretenders, fronted by a girl (!!) -- a tough looking chick named Chrissie Hynde.  I assumed she was British, but it turned out she was American -- from Ohio (as in "My City Was Gone" -- "Ay, oh, way to go, Ohio..."). 

Now in her early 60s, Hynde has written a memoir, "Reckless," which I snapped up on sale the week it came out in September.

Hynde grew up in post-WWII Akron, Ohio, and vividly describes her childhood there. She fell in love with rock & roll at an early age -- her first kiss came from Jackie Wilson at one of his concerts. Mitch Ryder, David Bowie, Jeff Beck, Paul Butterfield and Iggy Pop were among her musical heroes.

After high school, she went to Kent State University, ostensibly to study art, but mostly to party. (Yes, THAT Kent State -- and she was there on May 4, 1970, when the National Guard opened fire on a protest gathering, killing four students.)  Hynde had no ambitions and no idea what she wanted from life, except to have a good time.

While there's some sex in the book (including a violent encounter with a group of bikers that's become the source of much controversy, not only for what she's written about it but her subsequent comments and media reaction) -- and certainly rock & roll -- the one thing the book has in spades is drugs. Lots and lots of drugs, including copious amounts of alcohol. (Hynde admits she waited until both her parents were dead before writing a memoir, because she didn't want them reading the truth about what she had been doing.)  There are some colourful stories about her drug-fuelled escapades, but it does get kind of monotonous after a while. Different times...!

For me, the best part of the book began once Hynde moved to England in 1973, became part of the fledgling punk scene and, eventually, formed and found success with The Pretenders. It's fun reading her observations about the differences between American & British culture, and her encounters with punk rockers like The Clash and The Sex Pistols. (There's an amusing story about how she almost married first Johnny Rotten and then Sid Vicious, primarily as a way of solving her visa problems.) 

Unfortunately, she doesn't get to England until about 3/4 of the way through the book. The story of the all-too-brief rise and fall of The Pretenders rushes by all too quickly, and the book ends abruptly after the drug-related deaths of band members James Honeyman-Scott and Pete Farndon (with whom Hynde was once romantically involved).

Bizarrely, I felt torn between feeling glad that I'd finally come to the end of a very long, convoluted, meandering journey, and wanting to read more. It's a flawed book, but still an interesting read, and I don't regret having spent the time on reading it. In retrospect, though, I probably could have waited for the paperback. ;)

*** *** ***

A few chapters into "Reckless," I had a pedicure appointment. I didn't want to lug a heavy hardcover along with me, so I slipped my Kobo e-reader into my purse & selected a book that someone had recommended to me as a memoir that included some ALI themes -- "Clothes Clothes Clothes Music Music Music Boys Boys Boys" by Viv Albertine.  (And I never noticed until I added in the photos of both book covers how similar the poses are!!)

Can I say I had absolutely no idea who Viv Albertine was? None. Nada. (How about you?) From the blurb on the back of the paperbook version I saw at the bookstore, I gathered she had been involved with the punk movement in Britain in the late 1970s in some way. Sounded good to me (and anyways, the title was irresistible). 

(There are some books that I feel compelled to buy simply because of the title alone. One of my favourite novel titles (I bought the book but have yet to read it) is "Angry Housewives Eating Bon Bons."  Isn't that great??)

Turns out Albertine's book was a good companion volume to Chrissie Hynde's (and, actually, a better book overall).  The two women knew each other in London in the '70s and hung out with many of the same people. Hynde turns up in Albertine's book and vice versa (although the appearances in each other's stories are strictly small cameos).

As a teenager in the late 1960s and early 1970s, Albertine was a fan of John Lennon & The Beatles, The Kinks, and later David Bowie, Marc Bolan and, later still, Patti Smith. At art school (because -- like Hynde -- she had no other ideas about what she wanted to do with her life), she met Mick Jones, who later became part of The Clash and wrote "Train in Vain" about their relationship. Like Chrissie Hynde, she was close to Sid Vicious and Johnny Rotten of the Sex Pistols, and knew many other key figures of the period, including Malcolm McLaren and Vivienne Westwood, whose shop, Sex, was the source of many key pieces in the trend-setting outfits Albertine describes in loving detail  (the "Clothes" part of the title).

Hanging around musicians so much, it was probably inevitable that she would eventually become one herself -- even though there were very few women rockers as role models in those days, let alone punk rockers. "For the first time, I felt like myself," she writes about lugging her newly purchased electric guitar home on the bus. Never mind that she couldn't play a note at first, although she eventually developed her own unique style. Initially, she joined a band called The Flowers of Romance (with Sid Vicious, pre-Sex Pistols);  later, she became lead guitarist of an influential all-girl punk band called The Slits.

After The Slits disbanded in 1982, Albertine went to film school, wrote and directed TV shows and movies, and created sculptures. She met and married a man she refers to as The Biker (and later The Husband) and went to live with him in the country. In her late 30s and desperate to have a child, she sold most of her keepsakes from the punk era (including letters and other things Sid Vicious had given her) to pay for IVF treatments. Eventually, she did have a daughter, but not before enduring a great deal of loss and heartbreak.

Sample passage about loss & infertility (from a chapter titled "Hell"):

I am wildly, insanely bug-eyed crazy with grief. I don't want to live. I think of ways to kill myself. Throw myself under this passing car? Jump off Chelsea Bridge and drown in the Thames? Or just lie face down in this puddle and stop breathing? Poor, poor Hubby, he is hitched to a raving lunatic. But he is my rock, solid, grounded, steady. I love him so much that life is just about still worth living. If it's just going to be me and him, so be it. 

We keep on going to the Lister [clinic]. I keep on trying to get pregnant, months turn into years, fail after fail after fail. I am not a person. I'm a shadow, creeping along walls, quivering along pavements, my body itching, my mind wild, my patience stretched tight, ready to snap at the slightest provocation. I can't stand to look at pregnant women. I hate them. I can't even bear pregnant friends -- I stop seeing them. If anyone walks too close to me in the street or at a bus stop, I want to kill them...  

Lying on the doctor's table, week after week, my feet hoisted up in stirrups, I transport my mind outside of my body: I'm not here, it's the woman who is longing for a baby who's lying down there, legs wide apart with a man she's never met before sticking his arm right up inside her.

(Is that not one of the most completely raw, honest descriptions you've ever read of infertility & loss and what it can do to you? And that's just a sample.)

By midlife, numbed by the turmoil she had lived through and the minutae of suburban domesticity, her marriage falling apart, she entered into an emotional, long-distance quasi-affair with the actor Vincent Gallo. The relationship ended badly, but it reignited her creative spirit and gave her new courage to begin to write and play music again, both in a reunited version of the Slits as well as a solo artist. Would you have the courage to not only pick up the guitar again in your 50s, after 25 years away from it, and sing your own compositions at open mic nights at local bars??

Albertine, now 60, has led a rather messy life, and her book includes graphic descriptions, not only of her pregnancy losses, infertility treatments, abortion and struggle with cervical cancer, but also fellatio, crabs, her periods and other bodily functions. There were passages in this brutally honest book where I winced or cringed. But the more I read, the more I grew to admire this woman for her everything she has endured and survived, and I very much enjoyed the book overall. It's not just about being a punk rocker;  it's about growing up & being a woman in the latter half of the 20th century. "Clothes Clothes Clothes Music Music Music Boys Boys Boys" won several awards in the U.K. and was nominated for more, and deservedly so, in my opinion.

After reading this, I looked up some YouTube videos, both of The Slits (interesting & energetic, but dated) as well as Albertine's more recent solo stuff, which I quite liked, and also some interviews. Check out "Confessions of a MILF," below (her old love, Mick Jones, plays guitar on the track, although he's not in the video):

*** *** ***

Speaking of Patti Smith, her latest book, "M Train," was released while I was reading these two books. Like Chrissie Hynde's book, it was on sale for $25, and like Chrissie Hynde's book, I couldn't resist, lol.  I read & reviewed Smith's first memoir, "Just Kids," here.

And then a week later, Elvis Costello's memoir appeared on the bookstore shelves -- "Unfaithful Music & Disappearing Ink," which is getting rave reviews. So I have plenty of reading material to last me for quite a while to come (as if I didn't already, lol). 

*** *** ***

These were books #23 & #24 that I've read to date in 2015.

"The Secret Adversary" by Agatha Christie

Like many of you, I'm sure, I gobbled up Agatha Christie mysteries, one after another, when I was a teenager.  The details of the plots faded as the years went by, but I remembered the books fondly. My favourites were not the adventures of Hercule Poirot or Miss Marple (although dh & I watched "Poirot" with David Suchet on PBS faithfully for years), but the lesser-known husband & wife team, Tommy & Tuppence Beresford -- aka "Partners in Crime."

Unlike some fictional characters, Tommy & Tuppence aged as the series progressed through four novels and one collection of short stories: the first Tommy & Tuppence book, "The Secret Adversary," was Christie's second novel -- published in 1922 and set in contemporary post-WWI Britain;  the final volume, "Postern of Fate" was Christie's final book, published in 1973 and set some 50 years after the events of the first book.

I was delighted to read, earlier this summer, that the BBC was bringing some of the Tommy & Tuppence mysteries to life in new adaptations. The new series recently started showing on Bravo here in Canada (and on Acorn in the U.S), and I thought it was timely to revisit these two old friends, some 40 years (eeekkk!!) after I first read about their adventures. The first three episodes of the BBC series are an adaptation of "The Secret Adversary," so I decided to start with that. (The second set of three episodes adapt "N or M?" and further episodes are in the works.)

"The Secret Adversary" (the book) begins with the 1915 sinking of the Lusitania. Women & children are being evacuated first, and a young woman accepts & agrees to deliver an important package from a desperate British agent.

Cut to post-World War One London, as Miss Prudence Cowley (aka "Tuppence") runs into a childhood friend she nursed during the war, Tommy Beresford. Both are at loose ends, looking for work and for excitement, and decide to go into business together, calling themselves "The Young Adventurers." They get a little more than they had bargained for, as they are drawn into the search for the missing woman from the Lusitania and her precious cargo. And, of course, there's romance.

The dialogue is horribly dated ("Tuppence, old thing!" "Tommy, old bean!"), and I found myself rolling my eyes over Christie's idea of how an American would talk. The plot is likewise dated and a tad melodramatic, involving a Bolshevik plot to overthrow of the British government -- and I had a pretty good idea fairly early on as to who the mysterious villain "Mr. Brown" might be. But there were still enough twists and turns to keep me interested. It's a fun, light read with an engaging hero & heroine and I finished it with a smile. 

The new three-part BBC adaptation of "The Secret Adversary" sets the story in 1950s Cold War Britain.  Tommy & Tuppence are already married and have a son (briefly seen before he heads to boarding school). The program LOOKS gorgeous, with keen attention to period detail. As Tuppence, Jessica Raine, with her pixie haircut and red lipstick, reminds me a little of a young Elizabeth Taylor, and her wardrobe is to die for.

While Tommy & Tuppence the book characters are certainly amateurs who stumble into a mystery, they tackle their task with gusto. The TV characters, however, are obviously in way over their heads, and the script plays up their ineptitude. It makes for some laughs, but ultimately feels unsatisfying. I read one review that wondered whether the writers had trouble making up their minds whether to play things for laughs or thrills, and so the story winds up being a bit of a mishmash. There are some slightly gruesome scenes with the bad guys that seem at odds with the lighter stuff. It also doesn't help that Tommy & Tuppence here are a long-married, somewhat sedate couple in their late 30s or early 40s, instead of the energetic Bright Young Things described in the book. Tommy in particular comes across as a slightly henpecked, bumbling husband.

It's entertaining in its own way (and I still haven't seen the third & final episode) -- but I felt like it could have been better, and I wish it had followed the book a little more closely. I'm willing to give "N or M?" a viewing, though (and hope to read that book before it starts!).

What's your favourite Agatha Christie book/character? Have you read or seen "The Secret Adversary" yet? Thoughts?

This was book #22 that I've read so far in 2015 to date. (I actually read one other book before this, but that review is still to come & will be counted then!)

Book: "Pioneer Girl: The Annotated Autobiography" by Laura Ingalls Wilder

If you're like me & enjoy reading footnotes, have I got a book for you!!

I heard about "Pioneer Girl: The Annotated Autobiography" by Laura Ingalls Wilder, expertly edited by Pamela Smith Hill, a few years before it was released last year, and I have been following its progress through "The Pioneer Girl Project" blog of the South Dakota Historical Press. The publishers vastly under-estimated the interest in this book, which created huge backlogs in orders. It wasn't even available in Canada for a long time, but I was finally, recently, able to get my hands on a copy.

Like many of you, I'm sure, I grew up reading the "Little House" books and watching the television series.  I bought a boxed set of the entire series early in my marriage, intending to read the books with my kids someday, and one of the happiest memories I have of my pregnancy is sitting up in bed with my hand on my swelling stomach, reading "Little House in the Big Woods" aloud to my tummy while dh smiled at me from the doorway.

In past blog posts, I've reviewed several "Little House"-related books, including "The Wilder Life" by Wendy McClure and "Confessions of a Prairie Bitch" by Allison Arngrim (TV's Nellie Oleson). I've also read "Prairie Tale" by Melissa Gilbert (TV's Laura) and (back when I was in high school or university), "Laura," a biography of Wilder by Donald Zochert.   

So I was fairly well versed in Wilder's life story. Even so, there was plenty here that I did not know, had forgotten, or thought I knew but did not know the full story.

"Pioneer Girl" is really three stories in one.

First, it brings to the public for the very first time Laura Ingalls Wilder's unpublished handwritten memoir, "Pioneer Girl," which became the basis of all the subsequent "Little House" novels. In many ways, as some reviewers have noted, it's a much darker and more complex story than "Little House" readers will remember. For example, the novels gloss over some of the Ingalls family's wanderings, entirely skipping over the unhappy time the family spent in Burr Oak, Iowa (where the family helped run a hotel next door to a saloon, and Laura narrowly escaped molestation by a drunken man who entered her bedroom one night). The novels also don't mention the existence of Laura's baby brother, Freddie, who was born in Iowa and died as an infant.

Second, it's the story of the manuscript itself, and of an editorial and creative process: the introduction and footnotes detail how Wilder worked to refine the manuscript with her daughter, author/journalist Rose Wilder Lane, and how it changed and evolved into the Little House books that so many of us grew up knowing & loving. Many have thought that Lane was the actual author of the books (and she clearly helped herself to material from her mother's stories for use in her own works);  "Pioneer Girl" puts that theory firmly to rest. She obviously played a major role in editing the story and marketing it to potential publishers, and in shaping the books that followed (particularly the earlier ones), but Laura's voice and vision of what the books should be is clear and unmistakeable.

Third, as I mentioned earlier, "Pioneer Girl" verifies the historical facts underlying the manuscript and, by extension, the "Little House" books themselves. ("I don't suppose anyone will take the trouble to look it up," Laura wrote in a note to her daughter, after arguing whether a historical point should be altered to make a better story. Boy, would she be surprised....!)  Editor Hill and her team of researchers have done an absolutely amazing job of fleshing out Wilder's manuscript and adding to our knowledge of the books and the author's life by researching & verifying the stories, characters and places referenced (and pointing out the discrepancies between Wilder's manuscript, the finished books, and what the historical record would indicate).  Using census, newspaper and other records, they tell us more about people such as Soldat du Chene, Robert & Ella Boast, Reverend Alden, Cap Garland, Mary Power, and Laura's aunts, uncles and cousins, and what happened to them. (Nellie Oleson was a composite figure, drawn from three different girls Laura knew in both Minnesota and Dakota.)  They pinpoint the actual or likely dates of events Laura describes (everything from cyclones to blizzards to ice cream socials);  they find lyrics to songs that Laura herself could only partially remember.  The pages and pages of footnotes, photos and maps (plus a detailed introduction, conclusion and appendices, as well as bibliography & index) outnumber the pages of the manuscript itself.

This is not a quick read -- jumping back & forth from text to footnotes and back again -- but it's fascinating and absorbing and, if you are a big Wilder fan, an absolute must.  It's also beautifully designed and laid out, coffee table book size.

And now I want to go back & re-read all the "Little House" books again. :)

This was book #21 that I've read to date in 2015. I've now surpassed the number of books than I read in all of 2014!

Book: "Between a Heart and a Rock Place" by Pat Benatar

Pat Benatar's first album, "In the Heat of the Night," came out in 1979, just as I was graduating high school and starting university. To say it was a huge hit would be an understatement. She quickly became THE female rock star of the era -- lithe, sexy, fierce, and wow, what a voice!! As proof of her influence, her video of "You Better Run" (a cover of a 1960s Young Rascals song that was on one of the first albums my sister & I owned as kids) was the second video ever played on MTV (right after "Video Killed the Radio Star" by the Buggles).  

Much as I loved Benatar's music back in the day, I hadn't thought much about her lately -- until I recently watched a video clip where she and her husband/guitar player, Neil Giraldo (also known as "Spyder"), talk about the first time they met. (It was love at first sight.)  That reminded me that I had Benatar's 2010 memoir, "Between a Heart and a Rock Place," in my gargantuan to-read pile (the digital one, on my e-reader). I was looking for something light to read on my e-reader while waiting for SIL at a lengthy dental appointment recently -- and I finished it later the same day. (It's not a long nor difficult read.)  The meeting that Benatar describes in the video also forms the introduction of her book, and led to a partnership that has lasted more than 35 years.

Any respect I already had for Benatar was magnified by the time I finished reading this book. In some ways, this is not your typical celebrity/rock star memoir. There's rock & roll, for sure, but very little sex and no drugs -- she cheerfully admits she's boring. (Probably the biggest trouble she admits to getting into was as a teenager, when a clam boat she was on got into an accident and had to be towed by the Coast Guard, making her four hours late for supper.)

Benatar does, however, have plenty to say about her battles with the music industry, over everything from contracts to proper recognition for Giraldo's contributions to her albums to the blatant sexism she endured.  She clashed multiple times with the record company over the sex-kitten image they were determined to promote on her behalf, fended off invitations to sit on radio DJs' laps and was even chased around a piano by an ardent industry executive. She drove the label executives nuts by refusing to keep her romance with Giraldo a secret (female rock stars were supposed to project "availability"), and then getting pregnant. When Benatar started, radio stations wouldn't play two women singers back to back;  in the 1990s, she played some dates on Lilith Fair tours, where she proudly connected with a new generation of strong female music stars who had been inspired by her example.

Eventually, Benatar & Giraldo were able to take control of their career and use some hard-won lessons to their advantage. As Benatar herself says near the book's end, "While I made a pretty good rock star, I made an even better businesswoman."

Over a 35+-year career/professional partnership/marriage, Benatar & Giraldo have managed to stay focused on their music and on maintaining a normal family life. In later years, tours were limited to the summer months to accommodate their kids' school schedules.

Perhaps they value family so much because theirs was hard won. Yes -- what do you know???  Pat Benatar is "one of us." She does not mention fertility treatments, but she and Giraldo tried to have a baby for two years before their daughter Haley was born;  it took nine more years to conceive their second daughter, Hana, with an ectopic pregnancy in between.

Pat, you were a hero to me 35 years ago, and you're even more of a hero to me now that I've read your story. :)

This was book #20 that I've read to date in 2015 (which equals the total number of books I read in all of 2014!)

Book: "All That is Bitter & Sweet" by Ashley Judd

Someone once told me they thought I looked like Ashley Judd (!). I don't quite see it (maybe 30 years and 50 pounds ago??) but I took it as a huge compliment. I've always enjoyed Judd in all the movies I've seen her in, and I've always thought she was beautiful. Beyond acting, I also knew she was a strong feminist, an activist, and that she went back to school in her 40s to get her master's degree in public administration -- from Harvard, no less!!  And, of course, she's the younger daughter & sister of country singers Naomi & Wynonna Judd.

Judd is also the author (with Marianne Vollers) of a 2011 memoir, All That is Bitter & Sweet, based on her personal diaries. I thought it might be an interesting read, and picked it up about a year ago. I only just now finished it.

I've mentioned before that I have a fondness/weakness for Hollywood/celebrity memoirs. This was not one of them -- at least, not a typical one. Yes, Judd does discuss her acting career and some of the famous people she's met along the way -- but that is not the focus of this book, or of Judd's life, for that matter. Acting may pay the bills, but Judd's life passion is clearly for her humanitarian work, particularly on behalf of women and girls, and mostly in concert with Population Services International (PSI), which has taken her to slums, brothels and clinics in developing countries such as Cambodia, India, Rwanda and Congo.  The book describes her travels on behalf of PSI and the sometimes horrifying personal stories of the women and children she met in mind-numbing detail.

It's overwhelming for us to read -- and it has been overwhelming for Judd to live through. After a couple of years of such trips, and finding it increasingly difficult to cope emotionally, she realized she needed to resolve the needs of her own neglected inner child. In 2006, she checked herself into an intensive 42-day rehabilitation program at Shades of Hope, a treatment facility in Buffalo Gap, Texas, where she tackled deep-rooted issues of depression and co-dependency. Growing up, Judd was bounced around among various relatives and often left to fend for herself while her mother worked as a nurse and doggedly pursued a career in country music with her older daughter.

At the time she wrote the book, Judd was married to race car driver Dario Franchitti, and she describes how they met and got married in a Scottish castle. He's more absent than present in this book, however, and since its publication, they have divorced.  No doubt their busy careers and the long spells apart that Judd describes in the book had something to do with it.

On the ALI front (you knew there had to be an ALI angle to this, right?? ;) ), Judd is childfree by choice.  In the book, she explains:

The fact is that I have chosen not to have children because I believe the children who are already here are really mine, too. I do not need to go making 'my own' babies when there are so many orphaned or abandoned children who need love, attention, time, and care. I have felt this way since I was at least eighteen and I had an argument about it with a childhood friend…I figured it was selfish for us to pour our resources into making our 'own' babies when those very resources and energy could not only help children already here, but through advocacy and service transform the world into a place where no child ever needs to be born into poverty and abuse again. My belief has not changed. It is a big part of who I am.

I admire Ashley Judd hugely for all she has accomplished, personally and professionally, and overall, this was a thoughtful and absorbing book. It's a worthy read, especially if you are interested in her life & work, or in global feminist/humanitarian causes generally. But it's not an easy book to get through (there's a reason why it took me a full year, on & off...!). The subject matter, while worthy of attention, is difficult (you probably NEED to take a break from it every now & then); the language, while powerful and eloquent, includes a little too much spiritual and 12-step recovery movement jargon for my liking. At 470 pages (!), it probably could have been 100 pages shorter, and still gotten its messages across effectively. 

I'd give it three stars out of five.

This was book #19 that I've read to date in 2015.

Summer reading

It was a good vacation for reading:  I polished off five books over two weeks, bringing my 2015 total to 18. :)  Here are some capsule reviews, with ALI relevant-themes noted. 

(FYI, I accidentally posted a draft of this post earlier tonight;  my apologies to anyone who got a notification in their reader & then wondered what happened.)  

 "Watch Me" picks up where actress Angelica Huston's first memoir about her growing up years,"A Story Lately Told" (which I reviewed here), left off, in the early 1970s.  Like the earlier book, it's a fun read, chock full of famous names and interesting stories about Huston's life and career in Hollywood.  As an actress, she's probably most famous for her Oscar-winning role as Maerose Prizzi in "Prizzi's Honor" in 1985 -- but I had quite a few moments where she mentioned working on some movie or TV show or another where I thought, "Oh yeah, she was in that too!" (Would you believe "Laverne & Shirley"??!) 

After fleeing from an abusive relationship with a New York fashion photographer, Huston went to live in Los Angeles with her father, director John Huston, and his wife Cici, and decided to start acting again. Not long after her arrival (as the book begins, in 1973), she attended a party with her stepmother where she met Jack Nicholson. They had an on again, off again relationship over the next 17 years.

While I loved Huston's stories about the people and projects she's worked with over the years (she's a good storyteller), for me personally, the most interesting parts of the book were her frank discussions about her (ambivalent, ultimately unsuccessful) attempts over many years to have a baby and her thoughts about motherhood & childlessness (although I don't entirely agree with some of them). Despite her growing awareness of Nicholson's philanderings, "I wanted to be with him and have his children. I thought that having a child might create an intimacy between us, and eventually I began taking hormones for in vitro therapy, although I was unsure that having a baby would dispel the issues of Jack's chronic unfaithfulness or my own past indiscretions," she writes in Chapter 17.

Huston never did become pregnant, and finally ended the relationship in 1990, when Nicholson confessed to her that he had fathered a child with another woman:

The fact that Rebecca Broussard had become pregnant where I had failed made me feel inadequate and bitter. The path to discovering what was wrong with me, and why my reproductive organs were not functioning, was a long and arduous one. The fertility doctors had discovered that I had endometriosis, and had probably had it since my teens. I had undergone a laparoscopy, followed by a hysteroscopy, but a child was not to be. As hard as I might try to visualize it, I found the idea of having a baby frightening, and could never truly imagine such a thing as pregnancy happening to me. I think much of what a woman is has to do with procreation. And to find oneself infertile somehow renders one useless as a woman, in the grimmest set of the mind's eye, so I was very conflicted.  

I was never completely sure until my late thirties that a baby was what I really wanted, or if it was more about pleasing my mate. I still felt like a child myself, maybe because I'd lost my mother so early. Selfishly, I didn't want to grow up to be someone else's mother. Jack had been enthusiastic about trying in vitro, but we agreed that having intercourse by the numbers was a turnoff...  

Although in many ways it was not logical, the sense of betrayal was overwhelming;  I felt abandoned and dejected and humiliated. I was not yet forty, but in magazine articles, I was described as the older woman. We were now living separate lives, but I had always thought of Jack as family.

This specific part of Huston's story reminded me of Patti Boyd (whose memoir I reviewed here), who tried for years (unsuccessfully) to have a baby with both her famous musician husbands, George Harrison and Eric Clapton. She too left Clapton after he fathered a child with another woman. Despite their ups & downs, Huston has stayed friends with Nicholson and thanks him in the book's credits for allowing her to write about their relationship. 

In the early 1990s, Huston met and married the sculptor Robert (Bob) Graham (who died in 2008). They, too, tried to have a child together.  "I was now in my mid-40s, and this was my last chance to consider motherhood... Maybe a child could be part of our new adventure together," she wrote.  She underwent another laparoscopy, hysteroscopy and several rounds of IVF.

It was something of an ordeal. I felt like a human pincushion, giving myself shots of progesterone and Premarin several times a day, as well as going to the Alhambra for fertility acupuncture with a Dr. Peng. I remember praying that the outcome would be positive. Bob and I made the attempt to implant several times, but it had not worked. I felt like an animal experiment;  the whole process was a trial and felt unnatural.  

The last time I underwent in vitro, at St. John's Health Center in Santa Monica, it was with several of my own fertilized eggs. The doctors recommended that I lie on my back for a week following the procedure. Everything felt good until day five, when I felt a change and knew instinctively that the effort had failed. I believed that it was not meant to be, and decided that I was not going to try again.

Although Huston never became a mother, she is close to several of her siblings (particularly her much-younger half-sister, Allegra, who was only 4 when their mother died), and she is obviously proud of her nieces and nephews, whose faces fill the photo section. Near the end of the book, now in her 60s, Huston reflects:

I never thought I would get this far and have so many years behind me: life's kaleidoscope of colours, its sounds, emotions and special effects, its memories receding like rainbows. I have no children of my own, but it is daunting to realize that by now I might be not only a great aunt but a grandmother. I think of how children tie us to the earth, how hard it must be to parent them and then let them go.

*** *** ***

Celia's House is another charming novel by D.E. Stevenson, whose novels I read as a teenager and rediscovered around this time last year.  As I wrote then, "[Stevenson's books] are perhaps a little old-fashioned, very much products of the time & place they were written -- but still, well-crafted and realistic stories -- funny, charming romances, comedies of manners and family dramas featuring engaging characters."

"Celia's House" is very much in this vein -- old fashioned, eyerolling in some respects, but overall, warm, cozy, gentle -- the kind of book that's easy to read, but hard to find these days.  (Some Goodreads reviewers have noted its resemblance, plotwise, to Jane Austen's "Mansfield Park.") 

I don't remember reading "Celia's House" in the past, but it was recently reissued in paperback & ebook versions. Written in 1943 during the Second World War, it's the story of Dunnian, the Dunne family estate in the Scottish border country, and several generations of its occupants. It's my DES online group's pick for reading & discussion this month. :)

The story opens in 1905 with 90-year-old spinster Celia Dunne meeting with her nephew, Humphrey. She reveals to an astonished Humphrey that he, and not her other/older nephew and presumed heir, Maurice, will inherit Dunnian upon her death. The catch is that Humphrey, in turn, must leave Dunnian to his daughter Celia. The fact that Humphrey does not have a daughter named Celia (yet??) does not deter his aunt;  she assures him he will. The story follows Humphrey, his family and Dunnian through the years leading into WWII. 

As a childless infertile person, this book raised a few of my hackles. The childless couple, Maurice & Nina, are clearly set up as villains here. It's not JUST their lack of potential heirs that make them unsuitable, of course -- they are greedy snobs who clearly can't wait for Aunt Celia to kick off so they can get their hands on that big estate and "modernize" it. (But why is it always the childless couple who are the villains??) Likewise, Celia's confidence that Humphrey WILL have another daughter is jarring to anyone who has been through infertility. And (SPOILER ALERT!!), while there is an infertility subplot near the end of the book, it's resolved in the predictable, obligatory fashion (remember, this WAS 1943!). 

And yet -- Aunt Celia, while childless and elderly, is a strong character, beloved by her servants & neighbours, and determined to do what she believes is right for Dunnian and its future, tradition be damned. I loved her for that. Her grandniece and namesake shows similar strength of character, determined to wait for the right man and not "settle," even as she enters her 30s.

There are a couple of corny touches -- the lady that young Mark sees on the staircase, the visitor at the book's end. But, if you're willing to suspend disbelief, cast your mindset back to Britain in the first half of the 20th century and accept the book on its own terms, I think you might enjoy it.   

*** *** ***

I wasn't sure whether reading "They Left Us Everything" while vacationing at my aging parents' overstuffed house (as they contemplate downsizing) was a great idea, lol. Granted, my parents are both still here and well (in their mid-70s), and hopefully they'll be around for awhile yet.  Their small-town split-level is nowhere near as big as author Plum Johnson's parents' 23-room house (!) on the shores of Lake Ontario near Toronto -- and they've only lived there 30 years versus more than 50.

But my parents have also inherited stuff from THEIR parents -- and still have stuff in their basement that was mine and my sister's (!). And if/when they move (as they no doubt will, sooner than later), there's going to be an awful lot of purging and decluttering to be done (although we did make a bit of a start, a few years back...!).  

Anyway, despite subject matter that hit a little too close to home for comfort, I thoroughly enjoyed and highly recommend this book. You might think, given the subject matter, that this would be a depressing read. While there is sadness, frustration and anger in its pages, there is also warmth, fun, humour and love. Johnson thought it would take her about six weeks to clear the house and get it ready for sale;  it wound up taking 16 all-consuming months. She mothballed her house in Toronto and moved back into her childhood home, sorting, purging, cataloguing, documenting and reflecting. Despite the gargantuan task, Johnson says she now encourages parents to leave everything behind for their kids to sort out, because of what she learned about her parents, her family and herself along the way.

"I know why I needed to spend so much time in this house," [Johnson tells a friend near the book's end].  "It wasn't about untangling the stuff -- it was about untangling myself from Mum. The clutter wasn't hers... it was mine." 

I cried as I read about Johnson's final "sibling supper" in the house with her brothers, and their "Hong Kong Farewell" walk around the grounds. But it was a good cry. :)

*** *** ***

As you've probably guessed, I have a weakness for Hollywood/show biz bios & memoirs. "There Goes Gravity:  A Life in Rock and Roll" by Lisa Robinson, one of the first and best-known women writing about rock & roll, was irresistible, but I managed to wait for the paperback (& I'm actually glad I didn't spend the extra money on the hardcover). It's a light, gossipy insider's look at the last 40+ years of rock & roll and some of its main figures.

I can't say I came away with any earth-shattering insights or bombshell revelations, which was slightly disappointing (as some Goodreads reviewers complain, this book could and should have been so much more...) -- but there are some fun stories here. The chapters are loosely organized around Robinson's encounters with specific bands or genres of music, including the Rolling Stones, Led Zeppelin, David Bowie & Lou Reed (she introduced them), John Lennon, Michael Jackson, the Clash, U2, Eminem and Lady Gaga (who cooked her a pasta dinner in her parents' New York City apartment).

(Re: the Stones, Robinson adored the band's keyboard player, the late Ian Stewart. He was part of George Thorogood's band when I saw him in the early 1980s;  I remember a huge cheer going up when George introduced him. I don't think I'd even heard of the guy before that, but I certainly have since then.)

As a one-time journalist myself, I enjoyed hearing about how Robinson approaches an interview, particularly that she still uses cassette tapes vs digital recorders (I did too, as long as I was working) and always brings at least three recorders to each interview as a precaution, in case one fails. Her references to the scads & scads of boxes of tapes, notes and photos in her collection had me drooling.

*** *** ***

(POTENTIAL SPOILERS!) 

Having read Mel's mini-review of The Girl on the Train by Paula Hawkins earlier this summer, I already knew that there were some significant ALI plot points at work in this book. Alcoholism, job loss, marital infidelity and maternal ambivalence also figure heavily. In other words, it's not really an "up" sort of read, and none of the characters are particularly likeable, nevermind reliable narrators.

I didn't like that the book pits a pathetic childless, infertile woman and a smug uber-mommy against each other. A bit too close to home, perhaps?  However, I could totally relate to the book's gimmick: the main narrator, Rachel (there are actually three, which you might not realize from the title alone), travels to & from London every day on a commuter train, observing the scenes outside her window and making up stories about the people she sees.  One day, she sees something shocking, and goes to the police about it, setting off a chain of events that nobody could have foreseen. I kind of guessed whodunit before the end, but there were still some twists (literal and figurative) at the very end that I hadn't seen coming. Overall, a good read, especially if you like thrillers. If you're depressed about your infertility, though, you might want to wait until you're in a slightly better frame of mind.

Having taken a commuter train to & from work for 25 years, I can tell you that the parts of the book that take place on the train were SPOT ON. Dh & I saw the same people on our daily commute, day after day, and had private nicknames for some of them (as I am sure some of them had for us). The only thing approaching criminal that I ever witnessed was an occasional cluster of pre-teen boys standing  along the tracks after school, throwing rocks. Once, they shattered the window near my seat. It's tempered glass, so no flying shards, thank goodness, but the noise alone is enough to scare the crap out of you, especially since you're usually half asleep or deeply absorbed in your paper. (Little brats...!!)

I've been on trains that were delayed because of criminal investigations, though -- once, a fire in a junkyard along the tracks;  other times, "trespassers" (often suicides). Probably the most startling thing I ever spotted from the train: a completely naked guy, coming up the hill towards the tracks from an area known to locals as an unofficial nude beach. ;)  However, they've since built walking trails along the lakeshore in that area & I seldom see nude sunbathers there anymore.

As I said above, this brings my YTD 2015 reading total to 18 books. :)

What have you been reading this summer?

Books: "Ross Poldark" and "Demelza" by Winston Graham

Back in the mid-1970s, a neighbour pressed a paperback book upon my mother. "You MUST read this," she said.

So Mom did -- and then I did. And then we read the next book in the series. And the next. And the next.

The book was "Ross Poldark" by Winston Graham -- the first book in what was to eventually become a 12-volume series about the Poldark family of Cornwall. The first book, published in 1945, begins in 1783;  the final volume (and the only one I have not yet read) was published in 2002, just before Graham's death in 2003, and ends in 1820. A few years after Mom & I began reading the Poldark novels, the CBC began showing a BBC TV adaptation of the first few books. This was in the late 1970s, when I was about 16-17 and in high school. (It was also shown on PBS in the U.S., and was later followed by a second series/season, based on later Poldark novels.)  The only problem was, it was shown after the CBC national news, which was then at 11 p.m. -- meaning it didn't end until almost 12:30. On a school night. Happily (this being pre-PVR or even VCR days), my mother let me stay up to watch with her. (She usually fell asleep part-way through.)  The series was a huge hit everywhere it was shown, with the charismatic Robin Ellis and Angharad Rees in the roles of Ross and Demelza, and a backdrop of stunning Cornish scenery.

And now, it's back!  The first two Poldark novels have again been adapted by the BBC for a new generation to discover and enjoy. The new TV series was a huge hit when it was shown in Britain earlier this year (thanks in no small part to handsome Aidan Turner (and his abs, lol) in the title role), and it's now being shown in North America on PBS's Masterpiece. As a big fan of the original, I was a bit wary of a new adaptation and whether it would do justice to the original. Happily, in its own way, it's every bit as captivating. (Robin Ellis, the original Ross, even has a cameo role in one episode as a stern courtroom judge.)

Before the new "Poldark" series hit PBS, I decided it would be timely to revisit the first two novels it's based on (even though I seldom re-read books these days). (The show has been renewed for a second season, which presumably will cover the next few novels.) I was happy to find that, even after almost (gulp) 40 years, my memory of the various plots and characters (even some of the lesser ones) was still pretty strong. I would really recommend reading the books in series order, because each one picks up more or less where the previous one left off and builds on the stories and characters established to date. Obviously, I had read the books before watching the TV series, and while I'm sure you'd enjoy the show without having read the books, I'm glad I read them first -- I think it helps to keep the characters straight & provides more background that helps you understand the story better.

"Ross Poldark" was written just after the Second World War, and supposedly based on a soldier Graham knew. Ross is a soldier returning home from war (i.e., the American Revolution). Ross may have fought for the British Army, but some of the rebellious Americans' attitudes seem to have rubbed off on him: although he's from a fine old family of gentry, he consistently sides with the underdog and chafes against authority. His wartime experiences have left both figurative and literal scars, including a prominent one running across his cheek.

But home is not as he left it:  his father has died; his estate (Nampara) is in ruins;  the mines which make up the backbone of the local economy are failing; the rich are getting richer (most notably the Warleggans, a nouveau riche family of blacksmiths turned bankers) and the poor getting poorer (hmmm, where I have heard this before?) and -- the biggest blow of all -- his true love, Elizabeth, thinking him dead, is engaged -- to his cousin and boyhood friend, Francis. This creates tension between the two neighbouring branches of the Poldark family -- which increases when he gets involved in his cousin Verity (Francis's sister)'s love life. Ross distracts himself by working to restore his estate, including restarting a long-dormant copper mine on his property that will provide employment for the impoverished villagers. He also rescues a teenaged miner's daughter, Demelza Carne, from a street brawl, hires her as a maid and brings her home to Nampara with him, which sets local tongues wagging. I don't think I'm giving too much away by saying that the pair eventually fall in love and get married, scandalizing the class-conscious locals. 

"Demelza" picks up where "Ross Poldark" left off, with the birth of Ross and Demelza's first child, Julia, and Demelza's efforts to gain acceptance within her husband's family and social circles.  She has a kind and impulsive heart, which gets her into trouble, and ultimately leads to tragedy.  I don't want to give too much away (and the TV series has only just started covering the material in this book, so I haven't seen the episode yet), but you'll want to have some Kleenex handy. 

I loved these books when I was a teenager (especially the first half-dozen or so) and I still love them now. Strong, well-developed characters and storylines, great writing, history, romance, multigenerational family drama (with touches of comedy), class consciousness -- it's all here.

Have you read the Poldark books or watched the TV series (the original, the new version or both)?

These were books #12 & #13 that I've read so far in 2015.

Book: "Going Gray" by Anne Kreamer

"Going Gray" by Anne Kreamer has been in my to-read pile for some time now -- and after I wrote about my last visit to the hair salon (and after pointing others struggling with this question to this book), I decided it was time to actually get the thing read myself, lol.

Anne Kreamer was 49 years old and had regularly coloured her hair for years (at an estimated cumulative cost of $65,000)(!!! -- she DOES live in New York City...!) -- until she saw a photo of herself that led her to question that decision and contemplate the consequences of "going gray." (Hint: It's not just about the hair.)

The book had its beginnings in an article Kreamer wrote for More magazine -- and it does feel a bit padded at times. Kreamer seems determined to explore every angle she can find related to the decision to "go gray" -- to the point that I sometimes I had to scratch my head and say, "Seriously??" At any rate, she does do a thorough job.

She explores the history of hair colouring, how hair colouring products have been marketed through the years, and the pressures women face to maintain a youthful appearance. She looks at gray hair in Hollywood, in politics, in business and in other countries/cultures (particularly that bastion of fashion, France). Beyond interviewing women AND men (both famous and not) on their opinions about gray hair (can gray hair be sexy?) and their own decisions on the matter, she devised a survey to probe attitudes about age, beauty and gray hair, including photos of people with and without gray hair. With her husband's blessing (!), she ventured onto online dating sites, using photos of herself with and without gray hair, to see which profile generated the most interest. She even went barhopping, first in a wig and then in her gray hair, to see which version of herself attracted the most interest from men. (Sometimes, the results of these experiments were surprising.) She also visits an image consultant, and looks at how colouring your hair can be a slippery slope that leads to other anti-aging measures, such as botox and cosmetic surgery.

If you're wondering whether to "go gray" yourself, this book might give you some food for thought.

An update: I'll be heading home to see my parents shortly, but before I do, I'll be making my traditional pre-trip visit to the salon. ;)  I haven't made up my mind yet as to whether I'll be asking my hairdresser for a cut & colour/highlights, or just a trim -- but I'm leaning towards just the trim. And bracing myself for my mother's reaction, lol.

This was book #11 that I've read so far in 2015.

Book: "Not My Father's Son" by Alan Cumming

As an avid genealogist, I am a sucker for TV shows like Henry Louis Gates's "Finding Your Roots" on PBS and "Who Do You Think You Are?" on TLC. The shows follow a predictable format -- celebrities in search of their ancestors, with some jaw-dropping revelations along the way. There is much grumbling among us amateur genealogists about how much WE'd like to sail into an archive & have someone waiting for us with a ready-made family tree going back umpteen generations, and a pile of intriguing documents that answer our questions and shed new light on our ancestors' lives. ;) 

Scottish-born actor Alan Cumming -- who has stolen just about every movie and TV show I've ever seen him in -- was invited to appear on the British version of "Who Do You Think You Are?" in 2010. He was curious to find out more about his grandfather, Tommy Darling -- barely remembered by his daughter, Alan's mother, Mary Darling -- who never returned to England after the Second World War and died in a mysterious "gun accident" in Malaysia in 1951.

But just as Alan embarked on this emotion-packed journey into the past, he received some shocking news about another figure from his past:  his long-estranged and now dying father, who brutally abused Alan and his older brother, Tom, as they were growing up.

"Not My Father's Son" goes back & forth between "then" -- Alan's memories of growing up on an isolated Scottish estate -- "now" -- and 2010, where two stories rapidly unfold at the same time:  the filming of WDYTYA, with some stunning  revelations about Tommy Darling's life and death, and Alan's reassessment of his troubled relationship with his father.

It sounds complicated (and it is) -- and the abuse that he describes is hard to read about.  As several Goodreads reviewers put it, there were several points in the book where I just wanted to give the guy a hug.

But I'm very glad I picked this up.  It was riveting reading -- an amazing story, and very well told. I read it in three days & probably could have finished it sooner if life hadn't intervened. ;)  Cumming can definitely add "writer" to his long list of distinguished credits. 

There are many episodes of "Who Do You Think You Are?" available on YouTube;  alas, Alan's doesn't seem to be one of them. If anyone finds a working link that's viewable in Canada, let me know. ;)

This was book #10 that I've read in 2015.

E-book: "Finally Heard: A Silent Sorority Finds Its Voice" by Pamela Mahoney Tsigdinos

When I first started reading blogs some 7-8 (!!) years ago (and eventually screwed up the courage to start my own), the childless/free corner of the ALI community was a pretty small and lonely place. 

That's why I was so thrilled, early on, to find another blogger whose situation so closely matched my own -- and not only that, wrote about it so very well.  As I once described it, finding Coming2Terms by Pamela Jeanne (as she was then known) "was like stumbling into an oasis in the middle of a desert."

In the years since then, Pamela has continued to write about, inspire and advocate for "infertility survivors."  In 2009, she published her award-winning memoir, "Silent Sorority." And now, we have "Finally Heard: A Silent Sorority Finds Its Voice." It's a short read, an inexpensive e-book available through Amazon, and readable on a Kindle e-reader, or on your computer or other device using Amazon's free Kindle software.

Much of the material covered in "Finally Heard" will be familiar to regular readers of Pamela's blog and other writing, but presented here in one cohesive document, it gains new impact. The topics she discusses in this e-book include:

• the transformative impact of infertility (one that most of us are completely unprepared for), including the effect it has on our relationships with friends and family members;
• the "blind spots" and hidden biases we all subscribe to, often unconsciously, which set us up for the culture wars that pit parents against non-parents;
• the pitfalls of the fertility industry, which remains highly unregulated in many countries while raking in money from desperate couples, despite ART failure rates in the range of 70 to 77 per cent;
• the social stigma faced by those who leave fertility treatments without a baby; 
• the "indescribably delicious" feeling of connecting with others in the same situation (often through the Internet) -- "kindred spirits" who help create a healing environment that allows many to move forward; and 
• the weirdness of being a childless woman in a culture where, "if you're not a mother, you don’t rate... For the benefit of all in our society, we need to rethink how we value and characterize the contributions of those who are not parents."

There are also some questions at the very end of the book to prompt classroom or book club discussions. (They would also make great journaling or blogging prompts.)

During her post-IVF "coming to terms" journey, "I craved a mentor or role model who could show me that my life wouldn’t be ‘less than’ or empty for never having walked the well-worn parenthood path – for releasing a cherished dream," Pamela confesses.  But over time, as she encountered other women struggling to answer the question "what's next?" after unsuccessful infertility treatments, she realized, "When no obvious role model exists why spend all my time looking for one? Why not, instead, try to become one?"

Thank you, Pamela, for being such a great role model and mentor, for me and for so many others!

This was book #9 that I've read so far in 2015.

Book: "A Fine Romance" by Candice Bergen

When the paperback version finally came out in the late 1980s (early on in my marriage), I eagerly pounced on Candice Bergen's well-reviewed 1984 memoir, "Knock Wood." Back then, Bergen was best known -- to people of my generation, anyway -- as a stunning, cool blonde model and actress in movies such as "Starting Over" and "The Wind and the Lion."

But to my mother's generation, she was better known as the daughter of ventriloquist Edgar Bergen who, with his wisecracking dummy, Charlie McCarthy, was a major radio star (!). "Knock Wood" describes Bergen's somewhat bizarre Hollywood childhood, where she appeared on her dad's radio show and was known as "Charlie's little sister" (!).  Not surprisingly, she resented the dummy, who had a bigger bedroom and closer relationship with her emotionally distant dad than she did.  I thoroughly enjoyed "Knock Wood" -- Bergen can write as well as (perhaps even better) than she can act -- and I still think of it as one of the best celebrity memoirs I've ever read (and I've read a lot of them, lol).

Now, some 30 years later, Bergen has finally returned with a sequel.  "A Fine Romance" picks up where "Knock Wood" left off in the late 1970s/early 1980s, when Bergen meets and marries French film director Louis Malle.  They spent five mostly blissful years splitting their time between her Central Park apartment in New York and his country house in southern France before their relationship was interrupted by the arrival of two different women:  their daughter Chloe, and Murphy Brown.

Ambivalent about pregnancy right up until Chloe's arrival in 1985 (by C-section, three weeks overdue!), when she was 39, Bergen threw herself wholeheartedly into motherhood. (I'll admit there were parts of the book where she's in full-throttle mommy mode that I found difficult to read, even now, many years post-loss. Caveat emptor.)  The title of the book actually comes from the classic Jerome Kern song, which Bergen used to sing to Chloe -- who is now an editor at Vogue and getting married in France this summer.  

Much as Bergen loved being a mom, she recognized the role of Murphy Brown was just too great an opportunity to turn down. (Amazingly, the network wanted someone younger -- specifically, Heather Locklear (!!). Writer/producer Diane English insisted on Bergen for the part.)  As Murphy -- an abrasive investigative reporter on a "60 Minutes"-style news show, who belts out Motown anthems off key and can't keep a secretary (one of the series' best running gags, with some great guest stars filling in as Murphy's secretary of the week) -- Bergen became one of television's biggest stars between 1988 and 1998.  A journalism school graduate myself, I absolutely loved the show and Bergen's portrayal of such a strong female character, and I loved reading her behind-the-scenes stories about the show and the people who made it. (Curiously, I learned in an Entertainment Weekly interview Bergen did recently that "Murphy Brown" is very difficult to find these days -- it's not available on any streaming service, and only the first season is available on DVD. What a pity!!)   

If Bergen waxes on a little too much about motherhood for my liking, I forgive her, not only because she really has led an interesting life and writes about it so well, but also because she knows a little something about grief and loss and tragedy. Malle died in November 1995 at age 63, after being diagnosed earlier in the year with an incurable inflammation of the brain. It's hard to read about how this brilliant, cultured man, who sent Bergen such exquisite love letters throughout their relationship (some excerpted in the book), loses his ability to walk, speak and feed himself, and Bergen is frank about the toll his illness took on her and their daughter, who was just 9 when her father died. 

Bergen also admits that she has been extremely fortunate in her life. In 1998, she met Marshall Rose, a widowed, wealthy New York real estate developer, and married him in June 2000. I enjoyed reading about how she navigated midlife romance and remarriage to someone so completely different from her first husband:  she & Malle spent a lot of time apart during their 15-year marriage;  her new husband wanted to spend every waking moment together, which she found excessive and claustrophobic. Eventually, they both adapted.

She's also charmingly frank about aging (she will be 70 next year!), cosmetic surgery (she admits to having had some in the past, as well as botox & fillers) and the 30 extra pounds she's carrying these days. "Let me just come right out and say it: I am fat," is how Chapter 30 begins, probably the most-quoted line in the whole book.  

As you can probably tell, I hugely enjoyed this book. :)  It's a worthy successor to "Knock Wood."

It was book #8 that I've read so far in 2015.