17!

Seventeen (17)(!!) years ago, on Halloween night in 2007 -- 9 years after the stillbirth of our daughter, and 6 years after my last infertility treatment -- I hit "post" here for the very first time, and started my journey down another road less travelled: blogging.  

I'm not sure what more I can say about the past 17 years that I haven't said in my previous years of blogoversary posts. (And I will admit that this post is more or less an update of the ones I've written on this occasion in recent years!)  The blogging world has changed in a huge way since 2007 (most recently morphing into Substacks) -- but for me, blogging has been (and continues to be) a joy and a release and a comfort, and it has enriched my life in so, so many ways.  

I can't let this particular blogoversary go by without mentioning the person who encouraged me to start blogging. :) I'd been lurking around Mel's blog for a few months, throwing out the odd comment and then pulling up a stool and posting in the Lushary (Mel's virtual bar, fondly remembered), before finally taking the plunge. Getting to meet Mel (and her family!) this summer -- after 17 YEARS (!) of online friendship -- which led to so many other wonderful friendships and connections -- was one the highlights of 2024, and certainly of 17 years of blogging to date! 

This year hasn't been quite so prolific in blogging terms as some recent years -- 123 posts so far (including this one), versus 146 to this point in 2023, 163 in 2022 and 178 in 2021 (which turned out to be my most prolific blogging year so far). Still, not too shabby...! ;)  Somehow, I still keep finding things to write about... and I am very glad that people keep reading and commenting!  

Whether you're new here or whether you've been here the entire time (and I know a few of you have!) -- THANK YOU!  ❤

*** *** *** 

Blogging stats, 17 years later:  

 
Number of years blogging: 17

Published posts (including this one): 2,495

Average # of posts per year: 147

Average # of posts per month: 12 

(So far in calendar year 2024, I've published 122 posts -- 123, including this one -- a minimum of 8 posts (in February) and as many as 20 in one month (September -- thanks to World Childless Week and its daily themes!).)

Published comments: 12,474 

Page views (all time): 1,959,495 (!!) 

Followers (on Blogger):  155 

Past blogoversary posts here.

First blog post ever here! :) 

"The Marlow Murder Club" by Robert Thorogood

I think it was Mel who first put "The Marlow Murder Club" by Robert Thorogood (who also writes the "Death in Paradise" murder mysteries, adapted for TV and shown in North America on PBS).    

Then I heard that a "Marlow" film adaptation would be airing in four parts on PBS, starting Oct. 27th, and decided I'd try to get it read (or mostly read) before then (between book club obligations...!).  (I didn't quite finish by then, but enough to ward off any spoilers in the first episode!) 

Like the similarly titled "Thursday Murder Club," "The Marlow Murder Club" has older characters -- well, one, anyway -- at its centre. Judith Potts is a somewhat eccentric 77-year-old, living in the faded mansion near Marlow that she inherited from her aunt, sipping whisky and designing crossword puzzles for publication. 

(In the TV version, Judith is played by Samantha Bond -- "Aunt Rosamund" in "Downton Abbey," as well as Moneypenny in several James Bond movies. She's actually the same age as me -- 63!)

One evening while skinny-dipping in the Thames (!), Judith hears a gunshot coming from her neighbour's property -- and when she rushes over to check on him, she finds him dead, with a bullet hole in his forehead.  The local police think it's suicide, but Judith suspects otherwise -- and decides to start investigating for herself.  Along the way, she's assisted by dog-walker Suzie and the vicar's very proper wife, Rebecca (Becks), as well as the exasperated police officer (Tanika) assigned to the case.  

When another body turns up, they realise they have a serial killer on their hands. Can they figure out whodunnit before the murderer strikes again? (Judith is immediately certain she knows who the killer is -- but is she right?)  

Judith can be slightly annoying in her certainty and her refusal to play by the rules -- but that's also what makes her an engaging heroine. As with "The Thursday Murder Club" books, it's nice to see a fearless older woman who defies stereotyping in a lead role (with some great younger women in supporting roles). On the other hand, I found some of the writing kind of basic and not quite satisfying. (**MILD SPOILER HERE**)  Case in point:  at the climax of the story, Judith has a soliloquy -- at gunpoint -- in which she explains whodunnit, how and why. It goes on for pages and PAGES, and I found myself thinking that if I was the person with the gun, I would have done an Indiana Jones and just shot her dead to shut her up!  ;)  lol    

On balance, this was no "Thursday Murder Club" -- but it was still relatively entertaining, with enjoyable female characters. I think I'm actually enjoying the TV version a little more than the book (based on seeing just the first episode) -- but I'm still glad I read the book first! 

There are currently two other Marlow murder mystery books available, and another one on the way -- plus a second TV series planned for 2025.  

I was going to rate this 3.5 stars on StoryGraph, rounded down to 3 stars on Goodreads, but I'm deducting the half-point for that far-too-long climactic reveal. 3 stars all round.  

Point of interest: Watching the first episode of the TV version -- prior to finishing the book -- I thought "what a lovely little town, I wonder where they filmed it?" I did some Googling and -- would you believe, there is actually a town in England called Marlow, and the TV series was filmed there?? AND -- as I discovered when I finished the book and read the author's bio -- Robert Thorogood actually lives there!  

This was Book #31 read to date in 2024 (and Book #4 finished in October), bringing me to 69%  of my 2024 Goodreads Reading Challenge goal of 45 books. I am (for the moment, anyway...!) 6 (!) books behind schedule to meet my goal. :(  You can find reviews of all my books read to date in 2024 tagged as "2024 books."    

#MicroblogMondays: Personal odds & ends

• We took a drive up to Older Nephew's on Sunday with BIL & SIL for a few hours. There are still some lovely colours on the trees... but we had some strong winds late last week, and more and more trees now have bare branches. :(   November is coming... sigh... 
• Dh & I both had our annual checkups with our family doctor this past week. We both had bloodwork done in advance, and received the results before we saw the doctor -- so we knew a lecture was coming (erk!).  He was very nice about it (we love our doctor!) -- but he made it clear we both need to lower our cholesterol levels and lose some weight -- i.e., make better food choices, exercise more -- and indulge a little less during the Christmas holidays -- or else yet another prescription will be in each of our futures :(  -- something we would obviously like to avoid. (Both of us had higher cholesterol readings vs last year, but dh's was up significantly -- my HDL/LDL ratio was actually better than his!) We'll repeat the bloodwork in January to see if there's been any improvement.   
• Since then, dh has been going through our refrigerator & cupboards with the zeal of a new convert, lol. I've been trying to tell him for a while now that we need to be buying and eating more fruits & veggies. He's been doing most of the grocery shopping since the pandemic started (and he kind of likes doing it without me tagging along and slowing him down, lol).  I think he'll be making some different choices now...! 
• BIL introduced him to an app called Yuka. You scan the barcode on a food label and it will rate it -- which products are good for you and which ones you should avoid (on a scale from "bad" to "excellent"). (Sometimes that's fairly obvious, of course -- but there are some surprises, too!)  Apparently it also does cosmetics & skin care products too. (Haven't tried that yet!)  Dh has been having no end of fun scanning everything in the cupboards, refrigerator and on the supermarket shelves since then, lol.  
• Want to bet dh will drop 10 pounds in the time it takes me to drop 2?  :p  (Isn't that always the way with guys and weight?) 
• So far, we haven't done much in the way of intentional exercise, but we're going to try to remedy that soon with some walking, on days when the weather is decent.  We've been a little more active/out & about this past week than we have been. It all helps. 
• On the bright side, my other bloodwork results were pretty good, and my blood pressure was excellent, especially for me: 120/82.  :)   
• (Speaking of blood pressure...) Older Nephew's wife gave us all a bit of a scare this past week. :(  She's pregnant (with another great-nephew!) and due in mid/late December; she'll be having another C-section just before Christmas. At her most recent ob-gyn visit, though, her blood pressure was abnormally high, and her ob-gyn sent her straight to the hospital to get checked out.  Fortunately, all was well;  mom & baby are fine. The doctor offered to support her in leaving work early to reduce her stress levels, and we're all glad she took the doctor up on that. She's now off work, on unemployment/disability insurance until the baby is born and her maternity leave benefits kick in.  
• I can't WAIT until the U.S. election is over (while dreading it at the same time). It is SO close (HOW??!!) -- the tension just keeps on building, and it's exhausting.  (And I'm Canadian!! -- it's not even "MY" election! -- although it most certainly affects us too.)  
• I'm seeing lots of posts from U.S. friends mentioning how they are "doing their postcards" -- writing and sending postcards to encourage total strangers to vote in the upcoming election. It's not the first time I've heard people mentioning writing postcards during election season either. I have no idea when or how it started (and I'd love to know if it's actually effective!) -- but it must be an American thing, because I have never heard of it being done in Canada (or elsewhere), and I have certainly never received such a postcard myself. (Lots of flyers and other promotional material from candidates and political parties, yes. Postcards from total strangers, no.) 
• I saw my FIRST Christmas commercial this past week -- on Oct. 24th!  (From Old Navy -- I also saw one from Wayfair.)  TWO MONTHS out from Christmas Eve!!  Good grief!! -- It's not even Halloween yet, people!! 
• I know some people object to Christmas ads, decorations, etc., until after Remembrance Day (Nov. 11th). I think that's respectful -- but I recognize that ship has long since sailed...!  But waiting until after Halloween is over? I don't think it's too much to ask...!) 
• I finally booked our flights west for Christmas. Ridiculously expensive (travel within Canada always is, at the best of times), but what can you do?  I should have done it earlier, of course, plus we'll be heading there a little later in December (and staying a little longer into early January) than we have in recent years. Obviously, the closer to Christmas, the more expensive it gets. Also, we tend to travel on weekends, which makes it easier for my sister & her partner to transport us from & to the airport, neither of us particularly likes taking red eye-flights, which tend to be cheaper, etc. etc.  Oh well. 
• Does anyone else find booking travel as stressful as I do?? Actually travelling, not especially -- and dh's particular stress point is waiting to board, especially when we're travelling with carry-ons only (will there be enough room left in the overhead bins by the time we get in there??) -- but I get very tense while booking flights. Am I choosing the best flight? departure time?? seats???  etc.  Am I keying things in correctly?  Am I making a horrible error that will be difficult and/or costly to correct??
• Plus, honestly, EVERY TIME I book a flight or check in online on Air Canada, they've changed something about the process.  The options are presented differently, the screens look different. This time around, I got one email to print off. No online summary that I could print, no PDF to save (which I always like to do). Sigh.  
• Let the holiday shopping begin!!  lol  

No links this time around... more soon! 

You can find more of this week's #MicroblogMondays posts here.  

#MicroblogMondays: I love October :)

If I hate November (as I have often moaned in this blog over the years...!), I think I can safely say that, on the flipside, I love October.  Especially when it's like this October has been (so far, at least!). The temperature late this afternoon reached 26C with a touch of humidity making it feel like 28C (78F & 82F, respectively) -- not especially normal for this time of year, perhaps, but nice, just the same.  We have had the balcony door wide open for most of the day. 

Overall, the weather this month has been pretty good. Even if it's been a touch chilly some days (and certainly in the morning, with the thermometer hitting close to freezing some days -- we've had to turn the furnace on, and yes, it HAS been running!), it's often been clear & sunny as compensation.  It's gloriously so today. :)   

And the colours! It felt like the leaves took their time to start changing colour this year, but this past week, they've started popping out, big time. Dh & I drove back to our old community on Sunday afternoon, to get our covid & flu shots at our family dr's office, and I was kept busy trying to snap some photos out of the (unfortunately dirty...!) car window. I've posted a couple below.   

October is also Thanksgiving for us Canadians, and with all due respect to American readers, personally, I think the timing is so much better than late November. It's closer to harvest season (hereabouts, anyway), the weather is better, it's not so close to Christmas, and there's no Black Friday the next day to send you rushing out to crowded malls.  ;)  (Not quite so much football, either, lol.) You won't see vast hordes of Canadians jamming the highways and airports to get "home" for the holiday, but if family happen to be nearby, they often do gather to share a good meal and visit. We got to spend the Sunday of the Thanksgiving weekend with BIL & SIL, our nephews and their families. We had the meal (mostly) catered, and a good time was had by all.  :)   

25 years ago, I'm not sure I would have written a post like this. October 1998 was the month I went back to work after the August stillbirth of my daughter -- only to have to leave work again, two days later, when my beloved grandfather died at age 86. Not quite a full year later, but still in October (1999), my wonderful Grandma followed him... and a few days after her funeral, while I was still at my parents' house, my aunt's husband died, less than a week after being diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. 

I'm thankful that, these days (and certainly right now), I can enjoy October again. 

You can find more of this week's #MicroblogMondays posts here.  

I am (still) a Prairie girl at heart -- but I have to admit, 
autumn in Ontario is spectacular!

Oh, those colours!!  

Good news for bereaved parents in Ontario :)

Appropriately, during Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month, too! 

For years now, I've been jealous to hear about loss mom friends in other provinces/American states/countries who have been able to obtain a government certificate of stillbirth -- official or otherwise  -- to honour the brief existence of their baby.  

So I was very happy to see this article in the Toronto Star today! (Hopefully not behind a paywall... if so, saving to the Pocket app/site and opening it there often works!) Those of us who have lost babies to stillbirth in Ontario, as far back as 1944, can now apply to Service Ontario for a commemorative certificate, at no charge. It notes that "British Columbia, Saskatchewan and Manitoba also offer commemorative documents for stillbirths, but Ontario is the only province to end fees for stillbirth registrations."  

I have a little certificate that the nurses gave us at the hospital, with Katie's tiny hand & footprints on it -- but something from the government seems so much more "official," if you know what I mean, even if it's only ceremonial. I just submitted an application online!  :)    

Here's a link to the Service Ontario website with information about the certificate and how to apply.

(I suppose I could have made this my #MicroblogMondays post, but I was so excited, I couldn't wait to share!)  

"Persuasion" by Jane Austen

"Persuasion" by Jane Austen is the November pick for my Childless Collective Nomo Book Club.  

In a previous book club novel, "Queen High" by C.J. Carey (reviewed here and here), "Persuasion" was the heroine's favourite novel -- and she's saving it to be "corrected" last -- i.e., rewritten/censored to make the heroine more docile and palatable to the Nazi overlords. She knows that, when her work is done, the final remaining original copy will then be destroyed. (Shudder.)  Part of the novel is set in Lyme Regis, the setting of another one of our previous picks, "Remarkable Creatures" by Tracy Chevalier (reviewed here). 

So when my co-host suggested we should read "Persuasion" together, it seemed like it would be a good fit.  

At 27, Anne Elliot is one of Austen's older and more mature heroines. She was briefly engaged when she was 19 to a young naval officer, Frederick Wentworth -- but her family disapproved of the match because of his lack of money and social status, and the relationship ended. 

Eight years later, the tables have turned:  Wentworth has made a name for himself in the navy -- and a lot of money -- while the Elliots have fallen into debt and been forced to leave their ancestral home and rent it out -- to Wentworth's sister and her husband. Wentworth is now home from abroad, and looking for a wife. And Anne has never forgotten him...  

"Persuasion" was the last of Austen's six novels to be published in her lifetime, in December 1817.  By today's standards, her books may be a little slow and wordy.  But human nature is still very much the same, and Austen is a keen observer. I especially love how she shows us Anne's inner turbulence when Wentworth reappears in her life -- watching him from the window of a shop in Bath, aware of his presence at a concert, silently willing him to come speak to her... I was reminded of feeling that same sense of excruciating longing and hyper-awareness of the presence of the boy I was interested in, when I was a teen/young adult... (There's a reason why Austen's books are considered classics!)  

I've read three Austen novels in the past -- "Emma" (studied at university), "Pride and Prejudice" (between terms) and "Sense and Sensibility" (around the time the movie version came out, starring Emma Thompson and Kate Winslet -- the one movie I dragged dh to that he didn't end up liking! lol). Needless to say, this was all some time ago (cough!), and I don't remember a lot of the fine details, although I do remember I enjoyed all of them (and, of course, I've seen several screen versions of these books -- albeit not the infamous version of P&P with Colin Firth as Mr. Darcy -- although of course I've seen the clips of THAT scene!  lol). (I know!!). 

I've also enjoyed several Austen-adjacent books, including "The Jane Austen Society" by Natalie Jenner (reviewed here), and "The Jane Austen Book Club" by Karen Joy Fowler, which we discussed as part of Mel's Barren Bitches Book Brigade, in the early days of this blog.  

I'm glad to add "Persuasion" to the list.  I think "Pride & Prejudice" remains my favourite so far, but this one would rank highly too. (And now I'm tempted to try to squeeze "Northanger Abbey" and "Mansfield Park" into my gargantuan To Be Read pile!) 

4 stars on Goodreads/StoryGraph.  

This was Book #30 read to date in 2024 (and Book #3 finished in October), bringing me to 67%  of my 2024 Goodreads Reading Challenge goal of 45 books. I am (for the moment, anyway...!) 5 (!) books behind schedule to meet my goal. :(  You can find reviews of all my books read to date in 2024 tagged as "2024 books."    

Odds & ends

• I've whined -- umm, commented ;)  -- a couple of times in the past here about Kamala Harris's apparent reluctance to acknowledge the formative teenage years she spent here in Canada (Montreal, specifically), during the late 1970s/early 1980s (a turbulent time in the country/that province's history). She's still not commenting about that time in her life, but the Washington Post investigated and produced an interesting article about it this past weekend:  "These five tumultuous years in Montreal shaped Kamala Harris."  Here's a gift link, if you're interested!  
• My 2021 review of Harris's memoir. 
• From this past August in the Toronto Star: "Forgive Kamala Harris for downplaying the formative years she spent in Montreal. She has an election to win." (No gift links, sorry, but if there's a paywall, sometimes saving to Pocket.com and then opening it there will work.) 
• 2020 New York Times story: "In Canada, Kamala Harris, a Disco-Dancing Teenager, Yearned for Home."
• Speaking of the upcoming U.S. election (well, I was, sorta...), my 83-year-old American mother voted by absentee ballot in the last election for the very first time! -- she married my dad and came to Canada when she was 19, and the voting age back then was 21. (She didn't obtain Canadian/dual citizenship until she was in her 50s, I think? -- and so was not eligible to vote here either until then.)  
• She's casting an absentee ballot again this year, with the help of my sister, who (as in 2020) will courier the ballot to the courthouse in Mom's home county this week to be tabulated. I told her I'd gladly chip in for half the cost. :)  
• I enjoyed this chat (gift linked) among three Washington Post writers, revisiting Helen Fielding's  "Bridget Jones's Diary,"25+ years after its publication.  I first read "Bridget" back in 1998, I think -- not long post-loss, when I thought I might never laugh again, but desperately needed one.  This was pre-blogs or Goodreads, so I never wrote a full review of it -- but I've mentioned it several times on this blog over the years, most notably here and here. I still think of Bridget fondly.  :)  
• If you love books as I do, you will love Lyz Lenz's wonderful tribute to the power of books, reading and librarians: "I understand why people ban books."  (It's the text of her speech accepting a 2024 Iowa Authors Award from the Des Moines Public Library Foundation.) 
• To mark Baby Loss Awareness Week in the U.K., Jennie Agg, who Substacks (is that a verb?) at "Life, Almost," recently wrote a guest post for another Substack, "Books & Bits," about the books, poems and essays about pregnancy loss that have sustained her: "When a woman loses a baby, she is not transformed into an ethereal heroine." 
• Appropriately on Oct. 15th (Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Day), Sari Botton featured Colleen Long & Rebecca Little, authors of the new book "I'm Sorry for My Loss" on her Memoir Land Author Questionnaire #45 on Substack. (I really want to read this soon!)   
• The authors were also recently interviewed by Ryan Rose Weaver for her Substack, In Tending. 
• I've mentioned this book in two other recent posts, here and here. 
• A Latina woman writes in the New York Times about the unique pressures she faced until she decided to freeze her eggs:  "I Froze My Eggs to Reclaim My Right to Rest." 
• Mary Elizabeth Williams of Salon writes about family secrets, including an adoption:  "My mother's final secret: Searching for the little sister I never knew I had."  Sample passage (I love the image of "a tidal wave of skeletons shaken from closets"): 

I am now one of an ever-widening population of people whose lives have been abruptly upended by the revelations of long-held family secrets. The proliferation of at-home DNA tests has ushered in a tidal wave of skeletons shaken from closets, while generational shifts — and rising secularism — have made things that were once life-ruiningly shameful exponentially less taboo.

#MicroblogMondays: Thankful :)

Since we actually managed to make it "home" to see my parents this summer (after several years of not being able to get there then -- but usually compensating with an October visit to celebrate (Canadian) Thanksgiving), we reverted to the custom of previous years and spent Thanksgiving this year/this past weekend with dh's family, which these days means BIL, SIL. the nephews and their families. The official holiday is actually today, but we celebrated together yesterday (the nephews were with their wives' families on Saturday).  

SIL decided not to cook (much) this year and ordered a package deal from the catering counter at the local supermarket that was supposed to feed 10 people (we had 8 adults & 2 children). For $200 (Canadian) -- i.e., $20 per person -- we got: 

• 2 roasted boneless turkey breasts, 
• a choice of two side dishes (from a list of 13 -- we had mashed potatos and roasted root vegetables), 
• a large salad (choice of 3 -- we had Caesar salad), 
• 10 small buns, 
• gravy and cranberry sauce, and 
• 20 mini-cannolis for dessert (choice of 5 fillings -- we had ricotta/chocolate chip). 

SIL also made stuffing (from a boxed mix, which wasn't my Mom's, of course, but wasn't bad), sauteed rapini and a green salad, and the boys brought pies (apple, pumpkin and pecan).  It was all very good -- and, as dh said, "You would probably spend just as much or more to buy and cook all that food yourself!" Also, the portions were quite generous. We all took home leftovers! 

We had a good time, especially with the kids.  :)  The nephews took the great-niblings outside on the deck to play for a while, and dh & I took some really cute photos of them. :)  (A couple of non-human photos below.) 

Previous Thanksgiving-related posts here. 

SIL's pretty table centrepiece.
(Which we had to remove to make room for all the plates & food! lol) 

Part of the feast, before we all dug in. Doesn't it look colourful? 

Note the dog is sporting a festive Halloween collar.  :)  

You can find more of this week's #MicroblogMondays posts here.  

"Miss Buncle's Book" by D.E. Stevenson (re-read)

2024 marks 10 (!) years since dh & I first ran into a group of women who turned out to be fans of the mid-century Scottish author D.E. Stevenson, a favourite from my teenage years. (Coincidentally, we were all touring the home of another lifelong favourite author of mine, L.M. Montgomery!)  As described in this 2015 post, they invited me to join their online group -- which I happily did -- and I have been reading and chatting about Stevenson's books with them ever since then.  

One of the first books on the agenda after I joined the group was "Miss Buncle's Book," one of Stevenson's early novels (first published in 1934), and probably one of her better-known works. (I reviewed that book in January 2015, here.) You know you've been around a long time when you start re-reading the books you were reading 10 years ago (!) -- and "Miss Buncle's Book" is (once again) our latest choice.    

Diminishing dividends (1934 = the Great Depression) have forced quiet, unassuming, guileless Miss Barbara Buncle  to look for ways to increase her income -- and so she decides to write a book. The cardinal rule of writing, of course, is "write about what you know" -- and Barbara's book, the aptly named "Disturber of the Peace," turns out to be a thinly disguised portrait of her hometown, Silverstream, and its residents (under different names).  To Barbara's surprise and delight, affable publisher Arthur Abbott agrees to publish her book (under the pseudonym "John Smith").  To her even greater surprise, it becomes an instant bestseller -- particularly in Silverstream, where the enraged residents immediately recognize themselves and set out to learn John Smith's true identity. Each chapter features a different Silverstream resident, his or her reaction to the book, and what happens to them after they've read it. 

"Miss Buncle's Book" has all the hallmarks of a classic DES novel.  They are very much products of the time & place they were written -- a little old-fashioned, perhaps -- but well-crafted, funny, charming romances, comedies of manners and family dramas featuring engaging characters and lovely descriptions of the natural world.  I can easily see this one as mini-series on PBS -- period appropriate, of course.  :) 

As is my usual practice, I read the book before our chapter-by-chapter group read & discussion on Oct. 7th.  Correction:  I TRIED to read the book before we started -- didn't quite make the deadline, but it's a quick, easy read and not very long, so I was done before we covered Chapter 3. :)  I'll count it as a re-read once we finish our group discussion, in mid-December.  

Stevenson wrote two sequels to "Miss Buncle's Book" -- "Miss Buncle Married" and "The Two Mrs. Abbotts,"  both of which are on our list of upcoming reads for 2025-26 (and both of which I previously reviewed here).  (My previous reviews of those books here and here.)  So is "The Four Graces," where Miss Buncle makes a brief cameo appearance. (My review.) 

I wasn't on Goodreads the first time I read this book, but I retroactively logged it and assigned it a 4-star rating. That rating still stands.  :)   

This was Book #29 read to date in 2024 (and Book #2 finished in October), bringing me to 64%  of my 2024 Goodreads Reading Challenge goal of 45 books. I am (for the moment, anyway...!) 5 (!) books behind schedule to meet my goal. :(  You can find reviews of all my books read to date in 2024 tagged as "2024 books."    

Not a #Microblog ;) : Odds & ends on Monday

• No #MicroblogMondays this week, per Mel. If there was, I think this post, or one of the points in it, would be it!  
• Watching the progress of Hurricane Milton towards Florida. One of dh's cousins has a vacation home there. -- Well, actually, a couple of cousins do, but this particular cousin is the one who has generously hosted us at his cottage every fall for the past few years. 
• In fact, they have been telling us ("us" includes BIL & SIL) that we need to go to Florida with them sometime -- and when we were at the cottage with them a few weeks ago, the wife found a great deal on flights for a week in early/mid-December. BIL & SIL jumped at the invitation.  Dh & I regretfully declined, primarily because it's awfully close to when we'll be heading west to see my elderly parents for Christmas. I know sooooo many people who have gotten sick recently (with covid, or otherwise) after travelling, and I just don't want to take the risk then.
• You can guess where this story is going. Their house is in the Tampa Bay area, a few blocks from the beach. They lost their lanai (enclosed porch/sunroom) during a previous hurricane a couple of years ago.  When I checked in with the cousin's wife last week (via text), she told me they'd had an estimated 5 to 7 feet of storm surge hit the house during Hurricane Helene, a week-plus ago. (Gulp.) (They hadn't been there yet to inspect the damage, but they have a property manager who gave them the news.)  The house was still structurally sound, but requires a total renovation, and all the furniture and other stuff they kept there has to be replaced. She was still optimistic they could go in December as planned (!)... but that was before Milton came along...!  
• Thinking of everyone in the storm's path.  Stay safe!  
• As someone who loves to read books (albeit I will admit I don't read as many of them as I did in my younger/pre-tech days), this (gift linked) article from the Atlantic gave me the heebie-jeebies...!  
• "Psst. Don't tell anyone, but we might get a female president."  (Gift link.) I'm three years older than Kamala Harris, and I found myself nodding as I read this part (something I'm not sure young women today fully appreciate):  

Sometimes I think, after 248 years of the United States and 45 men as president, what’s taking so long? And then I remember, it’s been essentially 12 minutes since women could take out our own damn credit cards.

The fact that we’re this close — and with a woman of color, no less, and all the extra sucking mud that involves — is miraculous.

When Harris was born, 60 years ago this month, women could not serve on a jury in all 50 states. They had to have a male relative sign a business loan. They had no legal recourse against sexual harassment or marital rape. There was no no-fault divorce. They could get the pill, but only if they were married. They could not get a legal abortion unless their lives were in danger, and they could be fired for getting pregnant. They could not be admitted to Harvard College or the U.S. Military Academy or join their local Rotary, Kiwanis or Lions Club. Among the Fortune 500 companies, there was not a single female CEO.

To get to the point where she might become the first female U.S. president, Harris first had to become the first female district attorney of San Francisco, the first female attorney general of California and the first female vice president of the United States.

• Tangentially related to the usual fare on this blog, I loved this article in the Toronto Star about growing efforts to identify and memorialize the people buried in unmarked, sometimes mass graves, so-called "Potter's Fields." (Sorry, no gift links available, but if you hit a paywall, I find that saving the article and then opening it in Pocket sometimes helps.) 
• Tangentially related to the above point:  often, especially in years gone by, unmarked/mass graves became the resting place of stillborn infants. The Children's Garden at Mount Pleasant Cemetery in Toronto memorializes these babies, the result of one bereaved mother's efforts to find out where her infant son was buried, 30 years earlier.  The pregnancy loss support group dh & I belonged to used to hold an annual "Walk to Remember" and dove release at the Children's Garden site during October/Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month, and Mary Smith, the mother who created the garden, almost always attended.  
• Here's an article that includes the story of Mary Smith and the Children's Garden. 
• And here's a 2008 blog post I wrote about the Walk to Remember and the Children's Garden. 
• (If it's not obvious, the memorial I mention at the end, "erected by the drummer of a very well-known, Toronto-based Canadian classic rock band, in memory of his 19-year-old daughter," refers to Neil Peart of Rush. And now, of course, he's gone too. :(  There is space on the monument for him;  I haven't been back there in years so I have no idea whether it's been updated or where if he is buried/his ashes are interred there -- if, of course, he's actually buried anywhere at all.)  
• Carolyn Hax, advice columnist in the Washington Post, recently published this doozy: "Husband has been lying for entire marriage about wanting kids." (Gift link.) I know this is not an entirely uncommon scenario (albeit it usually comes up before you've been married 8 years and together a lot longer than that). 
• Not too much later from Carolyn:  "Name they chose for baby they lost was just given to newborn niece."  (I personally know a few people this has happened to...!)  
• Ryan Rose Weaver interviewed Rebecca Little and Colleen Long, authors of the new book "I'm Sorry for My Loss," in her Substack, now called "In Tending."  
• "Both loss parents themselves... [they] had set out to write the definitive book on how pregnancy loss is viewed and experienced in America – and in their words, “Why we are so bad at it.” "
• The book includes 100 stories about perinatal grief -- including their own, and including Weaver's.   
• I wrote about this book when I first heard about it, here, and hope to read it very soon! -- seems very appropriate for Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month!
• "Voters without kids are in the political spotlight – but they’re not all the same." The authors spoke at the Zoom call organized by the Alliance for Child-Free Voters in early September, which I wrote about here. 

It’s too soon to know whether child-free people can be thought of as a distinct voting bloc. But...  Given their size, growth, organization and liberal leanings, it may be time for American politicians to think more carefully about how child-free people fit in.

"Eat Pray Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert

The October book for my Childless Collective Nomo Book Club is "Eat Pray Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert (who is childfree by choice).   

This is not my first time reading this book: I first read it back in the fall of (gulp) 2008 -- how can that be 16 years ago, already??!  It was the early days of this blog, and Mel chose it for her Barren Bitches Book Tour. My tour post about the book then was more about participating in the discussion and answering some of the posted questions than an overall review (you can find that post here, as well as a related post here). I didn't join Goodreads until 2016, I think? but I did add & rate some books there retroactively, and gave EPL 4 stars. I also saw the 2010 movie version with Julia Roberts and Javier Bardem (yum!).   

It was interesting to revisit this book again, so many years later -- albeit it was difficult to view it in a completely fresh & unbiased way.  After all, EPL quickly became a cultural phenomenon (which Gilbert comments on in a new introduction to the 10th anniversary edition -- it will be 20 years in 2026 since the book was published!), and launched a wave of women travelling solo to exotic destinations.  

By now, the book's premise is familiar (even to those who haven't actually read it yet): in 2003, after the collapse of her marriage, her job and basically her entire life, Gilbert decided to spend a year travelling and living in three different countries: Italy, where she would realize her ambition of learning to speak Italian;  India, where she would spend time at an ashram with her guru (!);  and Indonesia (Bali), where she would seek balance and study with a traditional medicine man she'd met once before (and which is also where she met her future husband, Felipe). (They are now divorced.) In 2008, the "eat" section in Italy was my favourite, and I still think it is today. (Italian food -- what's not to like, right?)  But there are some fascinating insights into three very different cultures throughout the book. 

It's a fairly easy read, divided into 108 relatively short chapters (the same number as the beads on a standard prayer/meditation necklace, as Gilbert explains early on in the book).  While it's usually shelved among the memoirs/biographies in bookstores and libraries, I would say it's part memoir, part travelogue, part history lesson, part spiritual exploration and part self-help book.  

There was a lot of criticism of this book and the author when it first came out: she was called "selfish" (selfish? -- a single, childless/free woman in her mid-30s? hmmm, this sounds familiar...), whiny and self-absorbed.  I didn't really think any of that when I first read the book, and I didn't think that now either (although she did sometimes seem a little flighty/scattered).  What did strike me: her voracious appetite to learn new and experience things. And the wry humour!   

I previously rated this book 4 stars on Goodreads, based on my 2008 reading & blog post, and I think that's still a fair assessment today.  

I also read and loved "City of Girls" by the same author in 2019 (reviewed here).

November's book will be a classic that I've not yet read: "Persuasion" by Jane Austen. (And I'll be leading the discussion, so I'd better start reading soon...!) 

This was Book #28 read to date in 2024 (and Book #1 finished in October), bringing me to 62%  of my 2024 Goodreads Reading Challenge goal of 45 books. I am (for the moment, anyway...!) 6 (!) books behind schedule to meet my goal. :(  You can find reviews of all my books read to date in 2024 tagged as "2024 books."    

Right now

Right now...* 

*(an occasional (mostly monthly) meme, alternating from time to time with "The Current"). (Explanation of how this started & my inspirations in my first "Right now" post, here. Also my first "The Current" post, here.)

September was...nice.  :)  The weather was mostly nice, we had a lovely cottage weekend, saw some friends, spent some time with family (albeit never enough with the kids, lol). (But where has this year gone??)  

Pandemic diary/update: September was month #54 since the covid pandemic began in March 2020 -- now in Year FIVE. :(   And we continued to hear about people we know coming down with covid -- many of then for the first time, others for the second, third or more. I've heard of several seniors/care homes, including one in the town where my parents live, that were closed to visitors & new admissions because of the high number of covid cases. Again. :(  

We (still!) remain covid-free (knocking wood, loudly...), and we continue to mask in stores, malls and (most) other indoor public spaces hereabouts, especially where there are a lot of people around. (Well, I do -- I know dh has been slacking off again, whenever I'm not around to hand him a mask...!) 

This article in the Atlantic, from earlier in the month, explains why you should still be testing (and getting an updated vaccine). (Gift link.) 

Among other things we did this month, we: 

• Spent a pleasant (albeit slightly chilly -- I had to borrow a sweater!) afternoon on the Sunday (Sept. 1st) of the Labour Day long weekend with dh's aunts, uncles & cousins (and their kids and grandkids)(on his dad's side) at his cousin's home. They have a large house & property, including a swimming pool, and the kids had a blast. A little too much back-to-school and parenting chatter for my comfort, but it was nice to see everyone, including one cousin and her family who were visiting from Australia! 
• Went shopping for supplies before our cottage weekend at the supermarket and butcher shop, and picked up a new board game to play from the mega-bookstore (Sept. 5th). 
• Spent a hugely enjoyable weekend at dh's cousin's cottage (Sept. 6th-8th), for the 4th year in a row. The weather did not co-operate -- it was mostly grey, drizzly and increasingly chilly -- so there were no boat rides and I never even made it down to the dock on the waterfront once (although dh ventured down there briefly a couple of times).  But we were still able to get out for a couple of walks (where we saw a lot of deer!) and onto the deck for some hotly contested games of corn hole!  (lol)  Inside, we had the fireplace going, the men watched umpteen games of U.S. college, NFL & CFL football (far too many for my liking...!), we played a lot of board games -- and, of course, we ATE!  (lol) (See "Eating/Drinking," below!)  
• Met up with a half-dozen women from the Childless Collective community (Sept. 14th) -- most of them locals, but one visiting from Washington State with a friend!  We had lunch on the patio at a restaurant near where I live and had a lovely time!  
• Took part in a webinar for World Childless Week with Michael Hughes of the Full Stop podcast on Sept. 16th:  "What Can We Learn From Our Family History?" 
• Browsed at our recently renovated/reorganized mega-bookstore (but didn't buy anything) and then at a nearby women's wear store (Sept. 17th). 
• Spent a morning at the mall (Sept. 18th), walking, shopping and having lunch. Bought a few things for the great-niblings :)  as well as a T-shirt at Old Navy and a cookie scoop at Kitchen Stuff Plus for myself, and a couple of things at the drugstore.  
• I spent three Thursday evenings this month taking part in a Zoom webinar series sponsored by the Ontario Genealogical Society's Toronto Branch, about.... land registry records in Ontario, lol.  Maybe not the most fascinating topic, but well presented, and having three sessions allowed time to go through the structure in detail and reinforce what we'd learned from week to week.  Hoping to be able to (eventually!) look into the relevant records for my ancestors. (I'll be doing another OGS webinar series in October about writing about your family history.)  
• Headed back to our old community on Sept. 25th for a visit to our family doctor. We couldn't book physicals until late October (I guess he only does them on certain days?) and I told the girl on the phone that we would need our prescriptions renewed before then, so this was a visit to do that. 
• Went to the drugstore with dh on Sept. 26th to pick up his prescription and a few sundries -- taking advantage of his Seniors Day 20% discount!  lol  
• Headed back to our old community (again) on Sept. 27th for a cemetery visit, followed by a trip to the mall for lunch, haircuts and some shopping/walking.  Picked up a few Halloween goodies at the dollar store there for Little Great-Nephew & Little Great-Niece. 
• Went with BIL & SIL on Sept. 28th to visit stepMIL & family. We used to go fairly regularly, even after FIL died in 2018, but not that often since the pandemic began, and we hadn't been there since January (erk!)(although we did see stepMIL at dh's uncle's birthday party in late April). Her grandson is now 16, just got his G1 (learner's permit/restricted driver's license) and is almost 6 feet tall! 

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Also right now:  

Reading: I finished 3 books in September (reviewed on this blog, as well as Goodreads & StoryGraph, & tagged "2024 books").  

• "Fletcher’s End" by D.E. Stevenson, with my DES group -- a sequel to "Bel Lamington." Our group read started May 20th and finished in mid-September. (My latest review; original review.) 
• "Moonflower Murders" by Anthony Horowitz. The TV version began on PBS on Sept. 15th. I wanted to have the book read by then -- and didn't -- but I did have the first several chapters read, and finished it before episode 2 aired!  (See "Watching," below.) (My review.) 
• "Magic for Marigold" by L.M. Montgomery, with my L.M. Montgomery Readathon Facebook Group. I read this earlier in the summer, before our group read/discussion began on July 1st and finished on Sept. 30th. (My latest review;  original review.) 

This brings me to 27 books read so far in 2024, 60% of my 2024 Goodreads Reading Challenge goal of 45 books.  I am currently 6 (!) books behind schedule to meet my goal. :(   

Current reads: 

• "Eat Pray Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert (October book for my Childless Collective Nomo Book Club) (also a Barren Bitches Book Tour selection from October 2008, the early days of this blog! -- discussed here;  related post here). Currently at about 62% read. 
• "Living the Life Unexpected" by Jody Day.  I'm once again taking part in a chapter-by-chapter group read of this CNBC classic!  The most recent meeting covered Chapter 2. This is the 5th (!) time I've read this book, or the earlier version of it ("Rocking the Life Unexpected").  (Most recent review, with links to earlier reviews, here.)  
• "The Mirror and the Light" by Hilary Mantel (book #3 in the Thomas Cromwell Trilogy) -- part of a year-long "slow readalong" hosted by Simon at Footnotes and Tangents.  We started during the week of July 21st.  I chose to focus on some of my other books over the past couple of weeks, and as a result, I'm currently about 6 weeks behind the reading schedule (! -- gulp...), at about 29% read -- hoping to catch up, eventually...! We will finish the group read at the end of December. 
• "War and Peace" by Leo Tolstoy (!). As I wrote here, I need another book club/readalong obligation like a hole in the head  ;)  but nevertheless, I'm taking part in a year-long readalong of this book, hosted by Simon at Footnotes and Tangents -- a chapter a day for a full year, which began Jan. 1, 2024. (And I'm really enjoying it!)  Currently at about 80% read.  
• "L.M. Montgomery and Gender," an essay collection edited by E. Holly Pike & Laura Robinson. Slowly working my way through, in between the other books...! 

Coming up: Most of my book groups have their next reads plotted out for a few months in advance -- and listing them here helps me keep track of what I should be reading next. ;)  

• For my Childless Collective Nomo Book Club: 
• "Persuasion" by Jane Austen (November). 
• "The Christmas Orphans Club" by Becca Freeman (reviewed here). December) 
• For my D.E. Stevenson group:  This list of upcoming books should keep us busy well into 2025 or even 2026!  (A couple of the books are ones we covered shortly after I first joined the group back in 2014 -- you know you've been around for a while when....!)  
• Miss Buncle’s Book (beginning Oct. 7th;  original 2015 review here).  
• Peter West 
• Miss Buncle Married (original 2015 review here).
• The Two Mrs. Abbotts (original 2015 review here).
• Crooked Adam 
• The Four Graces (original 2015 review here). 

• For the Notes from Three Pines (Louise Penny mysteries) Substack Readalong: The last discussion was for book #3, "The Cruellest Month," posted in June 2023 (no further posts/books since then).  I've continued dipping into the series on my own, between other book club obligations. Book #6, "Bury Your Dead," is the next one on my to-read list! 
• Other books on my priority list: 
• "The Marlow Murder Club" by Robert Thorogood.  Hoping to have this one read before the TV version begins airing on PBS on Oct. 27th.   

A few recently purchased titles (mostly in digital format, mostly discounted ($5-10 or less) or purchased with points):

• "We Solve Murders" by Richard Osman (from my sister, and high on my "want to read soon" list!). 
• "What Time the Sexton's Spade Doth Rust" by Alan Bradley (Flavia de Luce #11)(ditto above!).  
• "I'm Sorry for My Loss" by Rebecca Little & Colleen Long (which I mentioned in this post, when I first learned about it) 
• "The Grief Cure" by Cody Delistraty 
• "A Pocketful of Happiness" by Richard E. Grant 
• "The Aftermath" by Philip Bump 
• "The Briar Club" by Kate Quinn 
• "Uncle Mame" by Eric Myers
• "Girlfriend on Mars" by Deborah Willis 
• "The Queen of Poisons" by Robert Thorogood 
• "The Sisterhood" by Liza Mundy 

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Watching:  

• On YouTube, on Sept. 3rd, a conversation between two amazing Canadian authors:  Louise Penny & Alan Bradley, marking the launch of Bradley's new book.   
• "Moonflower Murders" on PBS, the adaptation of the Anthony Horowitz novel, which I just finished reading (see link to my review, above). So far, I've seen 3 of the 6 episodes, and I'm enjoying it hugely.  :)   

Listening:  To Heardle Decades: Stats as of  Sept. 30th: 

• Heardle 60s: 76.5% (550/719, 219 on first guess), down 0.1% from last month. For some reason, the stats for my current/maximum winning streak are now listed as the same as the total number of games won (i.e., 550).  Before this, my maximum streak was 15.
• Heardle 70s: 79.7% (366/459, 205 on first guess), down 0.3% from last month. Max. streak: 18. 
• Heardle 80s: 41.1% (137/333, 55 on first guess), down 0.3% from last month. Max. streak: 4. 
• Heardle 90s: 26.4% (115/436, 24 on first guess), down 0.1% from last month. Max. streak: 4. 

Also:  I haven't been listening to a lot of podcasts lately, but I did listen to Stephanie Joy Phillips, founder of World Childless Week, on New Legacy Radio with Christine Erickson, live on Sept. 3rd. (The episode is available as a podcast to listen to.)  

Following:  My stats for the New York Times Connections game!  I've been playing Connections for a few months now (and I'm even in a Facebook group with one of my mother's cousins and a couple of her friends, where we share our daily results with each other), and in early September, they started a new feature where you could check your daily stats!  They go back to June 15th.  You can even check your "mistake distribution," which shows how many mistakes/unsuccessful attempts you used (you get up to 4).  

The first set of stats they gave me showed that I'd completed 38 games, and won 76% of them, including 19 "perfect puzzles" (with zero errors) -- not bad, eh?  My maximum winning streak then was 8.  

By the end of September, I'd completed 64 games and won 77% of them, including 33 "perfect puzzles" (i.e., more than 50%!) and a maximum winning streak of 13 (and counting...!).  :)   

Eating/Drinking:  

• Not enough fruits & veggies lately, I think...  :(  
• Plenty of pork! lol  We went to a family gathering at dh's cousin's on Sept. 1st, and BIL suggested that, as our contribution to the eats, the four of us should chip in and buy a "porchetta" (which could sometimes be an entire whole roasted pig, but generally means a large, seasoned pork roast) from a local Italian butcher shop. We picked it up from the butcher on our way to the party.  BIL vastly overestimated the quantity needed (typical...!), and everyone wound up taking a package of leftover pork home, which we had for dinner a couple of days in a row before throwing out the rest!  
• At dh's cousin's cottage, the menu included lasagna (store-bought -- pesto for me, tomato sauce for everyone else), hot dogs, fettucine (alfredo sauce for me, tomato sauce for everyone else, made from cherry tomatos from our hostess's garden), sausage with potatos & peppers, breaded veal cutlets -- and homemade gnocchi!  
• Our hostess realized she hadn't brought enough frozen gnocchi with her -- but she did have lots of potatos -- so we made our own!  I even helped by etching each little dough nugget with a fork to create ridges that would help hold the sauce. There are lots of different sauces you can use for gnocchi, but we just panfried them with melted butter and fresh sage, topped with freshly grated parmesan. Yum!  
• We also indulged in alcohol more than we usually do. A couple of glasses of (white) wine on both Friday & Saturday, and I also had a cooler on Saturday afternoon. I declined wine for Sunday lunch. I was feeling pretty tired by then, and I wanted to stay awake!  lol 
• Unfortunately, I woke up on Monday with what looked to me like gout in the big toe of my left foot -- the same place where I previously had a (much worse) case of gout three years ago. It was slightly sore and a little red, particularly in the morning. I took ibuprofen, tried to keep the foot elevated, drank black cherry juice and used ice occasionally. It was mostly better by the time we saw our doctor last week, and seems to have pretty much cleared up now -- fingers crossed...! 
• Had my usual fish & chips for lunch on the patio at the Pickle Barrel with several women from the Childless Collective on Sept. 14th. 
• Takeout:  The usual soup & pizza slices from the supermarket, generally once or twice a week; takeout teriyaki rice bowls (also from the supermarket), Chinese food from Mandarin; Swiss Chalet takeout rotisserie chicken with a baked potato (I can never eat the whole thing, but the leftovers made good sandwiches the next day!); and California Sandwiches.

Buying (besides books, lol):  

• Some new sterling silver earrings from my favourite local jewelry artisan. 
• Some new clothes for Little Great-Nephew & Little Great-Niece, including Halloween-themed T-shirts. 
• A new T-shirt for me from Old Navy. 

Wearing:  Still wearing shorts, capris and sandals (and enjoying them while the good weather lasts...!) -- although I had to pull on a hoodie, long yoga pants and socks while we were at the cottage!  But I think the days of sleeveless blouses and T-shirts are done for another year... 

Enjoying/Loving:  The drop in extreme heat & humidity. :)  

Appreciating:  Dh's cousins' generosity and hospitality in inviting us to their cottage (for the 4th September/October in a row).  We always enjoy their company!   

Noticing: It's getting darker outside a lot earlier lately (and the time hasn't changed yet!).   

Also, the fall colours seem to be taking their time to pop out...! Still not too evident hereabouts... just a tinge of yellow or red here & there... 

Also:  It's early October and the air conditioning is still kicking in! (??)  It hasn't been particularly warm, but it HAS been slightly humid, on & off.  

Trying:  To read at a little bit every night before turning out the lights (if not earlier in the day too).  

Prioritizing:  Book club reading first, then my own picks. 

Wondering:  When we should head home for Christmas holidays? (Time to book our tickets soon!) 

Wanting: Another pedicure soon, before shoes & socks weather returns...!  (Maybe next week, before Thanksgiving?)  

Hoping:  For good results from our upcoming bloodwork (at least, nothing worse than last year's results??).  

Anticipating: Spending some time with Little Great-Nephew this weekend.  He'll be spending the day at his grandparents' house while his parents attend a wedding downtown.  Younger Nephew might be bringing Little Great-Niece over then too.  :)  

Also: Seeing them all the following weekend for (Canadian) Thanksgiving. We've spent the last several Thanksgivings in Manitoba with my family, since we weren't able to get there during the summers, but since we were there this summer (finally!), we'll be staying here. (Back west for Christmas!) 

Feeling:  (Mostly) Happy with life at the moment.  :)