#MicroblogMondays: Annoying things & small pleasures

Annoying things: 

• As I mentioned here back in March, I unsubscribed from the Washington Post:  my longtime subscription ran out in late May. I was sad to let it go (particularly since it was a REALLY good deal that I'll probably never get again...!), but I wanted to express my displeasure over some of the decisions made by the publisher, overruling his own editorial department on several occasions.  
• The annoying thing:  I thought I would be able to read at least a couple of articles every month for free -- but that doesn't seem to be the case. Every time I click on a link to a Post story, I get a pop up inviting me to re-subscribe (that will not go away, no matter where I click). Sigh.  
• Back around Eastertime, dh & I were at Canadian Tire (which, as any Canadian can tell you, sells a lot more than tires!) when we spotted a display of diapers, at a very reasonable price. We knew we'd be seeing Older Nephew & family over the holiday weekend, so we picked up a carton of diapers for Little Great-Nephew #2 (something I'm sure I could NEVER have imagined doing, 25 years ago!). I have a points card from the store, and used it then.  
• Annoying thing: I recently had an email from Canadian Tire land in my inbox. Header:  "Reminder: Stock up on diapers" (!!). Seriously?? (Reminder to self: Don't use your points card when buying baby-related stuff...!)   
• A lovely little Italian bakery/cafe/gelatoria in the heart of the original old village here that specialized in cannolis closed in mid-June with one day's notice. (The same family does still operate larger bakery/cafe, a bit further away from us.) It was a great/convenient place to stop and pick up some pastries en route to a family gathering -- and we went there once, pre-pandemic, just to sit and enjoy a couple of mini-cannolis and cappuccinos together. I was hoping to do it agai... (I need to learn not to put these things off...!)(The lemon cannolis were to die for...!) 
• Dental checkup later this week. :p  Fingers crossed that all is well...!  

Small pleasures: 

• Spending time with both nephews, their wives and kids (all the LGNs!) at BIL's on Saturday. We hadn't seen LGNephew #1 since Easter!  
• Not so much annoying as "ouch":  the moment when the Father's Day gifts came out.  :p  (Dh knew this would be a FDay celebration; it was his choice to be there!)  
• Longer days (until the solstice later this week, anyway...!) and nicer weather. (FINALLY!)  :) 
• Clearing most of my book club obligations for the next few weeks, and blazing through a book of my own choice (review here).  SO MUCH FUN.  

You can find more of this week's #MicroblogMondays posts here. 

Odds & ends

• So lovely to see Infertile Phoenix back writing on her blog again! :) 
• I'm SO glad I read Louise Penny's latest newsletter (which landed in my email inbox last weekend, I think) in time to catch her on Tuesday, Sept. 3rd, in a live (recorded for later viewing) YouTube conversation with Alan Bradley, author of the delightful Flavia de Luce mysteries. The 11th in the series, "What Time the Sexton's Spade Doth Rust," was released that same day. (Penny also has a new Inspector Gamache/Three Pines mystery coming out later this fall.)  I think I had a smile on my face the entire hour!  :)  
• Margaret Renkl in the New York Times is a gorgeous writer. And her latest column -- "My Bookshelf, Myself" -- well, I feel SEEN, lol. 
• Annoying thing:  AARP Medical Supplement TV ad from the U.S., in which a woman crows "Grandkids!! I can't wait!!"  (eyeroll) 
• (I also got to hear this line from someone at a recent family gathering. Sigh...) 
• In a recent link roundup in her "Life, Almost" Substack, Jennie Agg flagged this fascinating article about the lack of data related to pregnancy loss in the U.S., and what can be learned from other countries (the U.K. in particular). (Sadly, I don't think Canada is too much better than the U.S. in this regard...) 
• New Substack for childless and childfree aunties: "The Auntie Bulletin" by Lisa Sibbett.  
• Jody Day examines "The friendship apocalypse" at 60 in her Childless Elderwomen Substack. 
• Nesrine Malik in the Guardian: "The right’s obsession with childless women isn’t just about ideology: it’s essential to the capitalist machine." 
• "Sperm donors are anonymous in Canada. Adult children are finding their roots anyway." (I knew about the shortage of donor sperm in Canada, but was surprised to learn that -- outside of the province of Quebec -- my country is one of the few where donors can still remain anonymous.) 
• Michael Hughes of the Full Stop podcast spoke to a reporter about "The grief of childlessness on Father's Day" (which was celebrated in Australia recently).  
• Michael & I will be discussing  "What Can We Learn From Our Family History?" in a webinar for World Childless Week on Monday, Sept. 16th. Details and links in this post.  
• Are men (finally??!) waking up to the importance of reproductive rights in America?  Great article (gift linked)  in the Washington Post:  "A louder voice in fighting abortion bans: Men in red states." (Subhead:  "More men are speaking out in defense of reproductive rights because of harrowing experiences that wives or partners have suffered when a pregnancy went awry.")  
• "When Oprah says ‘childless cat lady,’ and the camera’s on you."  (I remenber noticing the camera on this particular woman nodding at Oprah's remarks, and thought "Yikes!"  Glad to read that she's taken her moment in the spotlight in good humour...!)
• Monica Hesse's recent column in the Washington Post is an absolute must read (so here's a gift link!):  "JD Vance's repeated digs at childless women are worse than you thought." Subhead: "It’s not about the kids they don’t have. It’s about the empathy he can’t even fathom."  
• The whole piece is great, but I especially loved this passage:  

Disparaging childless people once is a misspeak. Twice is a PR crisis. Three times and you have, as we say in the journalism business, a trend.

Odds & ends

A couple of personal notes:  

• It's been overcast, grey, occasionally rainy, and cool to chilly, more often than not lately. Where is my summer??  :(  
• Younger Nephew invited us over for lunch last Saturday, along with his parents (BIL & SIL). They live close enough to us that we could walk there & back. Little Great-Niece entertained us royally  :)  and we left with enough leftovers for lunch for the next several days.  :)  A very nice afternoon! 
• Dh recently remarked on the number of books showing up in his e-book sales emails related to fathers & kids -- and dads and daughters in particular (in advance of Father's Day this weekend).  He usually doesn't say much in this vein, so I'm guessing it was bothering him more than usual...!  :(  

And now, a few good recent reads on my radar lately:  

• A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about a thought-provoking piece I'd read by Ruby Warrington in her email newsletter, which (together with a Substack piece from another writer) got me thinking about "information overload versus creativity." 
• Ruby received such a big response to that email that she decided to post the text on her website and to point to it on her social media accounts. I had to do a bit of hunting to find it (it's kind of buried in there!), but here's the link, in case you'd like to read the whole thing:  "Creativity in the The Era of 'Peak Content'."
• Says Ruby, introducing her essay: "I realize the irony of me putting the following into a blog post that I also plan to share on social media. In fact, I hesitated before writing this piece, which I originally shared on my newsletter. Wouldn’t I just be adding to the problem? But the response was overwhelming; clearly, I am not alone in these reflections. Which makes me think a new way of doing things is ready to emerge."
• The New York Times interviewed 10 prominent artists on the subject of grief and how it's changed them. 
• Alison Motluk has a thought-provoking essay about the implications of sperm donation on her Hey Reprotech Substack:  "Anonymous Father's Day." 
• Is U.S. First Lady Jill Biden Hunter Biden's mom? Monica Hesse of the Washington Post weighs in. (I know everyone's story is different, but may step- and adoptive mothers will relate...!)
• As someone whose daughter was stillborn at least in part because of placental issues, I was glad to see this article in the Atlantic:  "A Breakthrough in Preventing Stillbirth." (Subhead: "Half of pregnancy losses have unidentified causes. The placenta could provide answers.")(Gift link, good for 14 days after this post is published.) 
• https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2024/06/placenta-stillbirths-research/678570/ 
• "You Decided to Become a Mother. What Happened Next?" The New York Times wants to know! (Gift link.)  There's a form you can fill out. (You may be contacted by a reporter for more information.)  It would be nice if they got the message that the journey to motherhood is not always smooth, does not always end happily ever after and, for some of us, motherhood ultimately never happens at all.  
• Jake Tapper mentioned on CNN today that many of the 20 children who were murdered at Sandy Hook school in Connecticut 12 (!!) years ago would be graduating high school right about now. !!!  
• Hearing that was a gut punch that brought tears to my eyes. I remember how incredibly hard it was, watching the parents of Katie's peers proudly posting photos of their child's graduation in June 2016, and then taking them to university that fall (and mourning their "empty nests" -- when mine had never been occupied to begin with...)  My heart goes out to the parents of those precious children who never got the chance to grow up and graduate. 
• At the time Sandy Hook happened, Mel wrote about focusing on remembering just one of the young lives among the many snuffed out prematurely on that terrible day. As I wrote in a blog post at the time, I chose Ana Marquez-Greene, whose family had ties to my home province of Manitoba.  I still think about her whenever Sandy Hook comes up. 

#MicroblogMondays: Odds & ends

Some odds & ends to start off the new week! 

• Once again, a tragic story unfolded this weekend, connected to a place I knew well in my childhood.  :(   Late last week, a small bus/van full of seniors from Dauphin, Manitoba, collided with a semi-truck at an intersection on the Trans-Canada Highway (the main east-west route that runs right across Canada). 10 people are dead (still to be publicly identified);  15 still in hospital.  They were just 10 minutes from their destination, a casino near the town of Carberry. It's believed to be the worst mass casualty event in my home province's history. :(  
• Between 1969 and 1974 (from the time I was 8 until I was 13), we lived in a small town about a 45-minute drive from Dauphin. Dauphin was the closest "big town" -- my mother would drive there every few weeks to buy groceries at the supermarket there (larger selection and lower prices than what we could get locally);  we would go there to see the dentist and optometrist and do other shopping;  and we would go there to the movies. Our best friends' mom & my mom would drop us off at the theatre for the Saturday matinee while they went shopping, and we'd all meet up later (and maybe pick up a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken to take home and reheat for dinner, or stop at the A&W drive-in for hamburgers, fries and their signature root beer) before heading home again. 
• Between 1974 and 1980, we lived in another town along the Trans-Canada Highway, between Winnipeg & Brandon, and then between 1980 and 1984, while I was at university in Winnipeg, my parents lived in yet another small town, about an hour south of Brandon. So I've made that trip along the Trans-Canada, past that spot, many times, often by bus, to visit friends in Brandon and to visit my parents (they'd pick me up at the bus depot there and drive me home). 
• Five years ago, in the spring of 2018, another horrific bus/truck crash near Nipawin, Saskatchewan (as well as another nearby town where we'd lived, 1966-69), claimed the lives of 15 young hockey players from the town of Humboldt. (Those involved with investigating that crash and supporting the survivors and families are now providing assistance with this one.) And last fall, 10 people died and 18 were wounded in a murderous rampage through two communities in northeastern Saskatchewan, both near yet another small town where we'd once lived (1963-66). 
• Here's an excellent article from Psychology Today: "The Cruelty of Natalism."  (Subhead:  "Personal Perspective: If you don’t know what it means, that’s part of the problem.")  Excerpt: 

We all need to make room in our lives, and in the world, for people who don’t have, can’t have, and/or don’t want children. This requires checking our own natalism and working toward a world in which there’s a place for people without kids. Yes, some people are happily child-free. Others aren’t. Either way, they’re all struggling to exist in a world that tells them they don’t belong here.

• Well, what do you know? The New York Times ran an article about men & infertility on Father's Day! (Gift link.)  
• The NYT also offered tips on how to cope when Father's Day is hard, for whatever reason (which also apply for other difficult holidays & celebrations). (Gift link.) Content warning: adoption/birth announcement (on Mother's Day, no less...!) at the end of the article. 
• Speaking of Father's Day -- we watch CBS Sunday Morning every week, and we usually enjoy Jim Gaffigan's wry commentary -- he's one of dh's favourite comedians. But his piece today about fathers vs men who don't have kids totally missed the mark. :p  (There are lots of commenters on the show's Facebook page who agree with me.)  I'm not going to link to it directly, but if you're curious, it's on the show's website and also on its Facebook page. 
• Yael Wolfe hits it out of the ballpark once again with a rant on Medium about how aunties are undervalued ("The Auntie Era Has Arrived").  Unfortunately, it's a members-only story, and there don't appear to be any gift links.  :(  A couple of sample quotes: 

From where I’m sitting, childless and childfree aunties are one of the most unsung heroes of our world. And I’m so tired of witnessing our society judge and ignore them...

When I see the way childless/childfree aunties are treated, how invisible they are, and how underappreciated they are, I worry. When I hear people proclaim that mothers are more valuable to the world simply because of their parental status, I worry. And hell, when I see how much we fetishize the selflessness of mothers, I worry.

We don’t do this with men...  

• I didn't know who Tori Bowle was, but her sad death at 32 while 8 months pregnant has people talking about ecclampsia. (Gift links.)(I'm going to run out for the month soon...!) 
• Ten years ago (!), I wrote about my own mother's brush with ecclampsia when she gave birth to me, 62 years ago, after it was in the news when Lady Sybil Crawley, a character on "Downton Abbey," died from it. 
• Anne Helen Petersen features women talking about their fibroids in her Substack newsletter, Culture Study. 
• Jessica Wildfire, who writes the "OK Doomer" Substack, is even more cautious/paranoid about covid than I am.  And now her daughter is sick (with what to be determined...). I don't always agree with everything she writes, but I was nodding when I read this passage: 

It’s easy to call someone a doomer or a fearmonger if you’ve never lived through a rare tragedy. It’s easy to tell them to keep calm and carry on. It’s easy to tell them to look on the bright side. It’s easy to say everything will be fine.

It’s not so easy when you’ve lived through doom.

That’s why we keep our guard up.

You can find more of this week's #MicroblogMondays posts here. 

#MicroblogMondays: Odds & ends

• 
  Well, that didn't last long...! Bloglovin' is showing a FEW news posts every day on my phone
  app, but the laptop version has been out for more than a week now, since LAST Saturday night (i.e., June 11th). There have been flickers of activity when it seems to be up briefly -- but then it's gone again. 
• I've poked around Google, and apparently the company changed ownership in 2018 or 2019. Since then, it's like nobody's running the show over there. (eyeroll)  
• Feedly will only give you 100 free feeds;  if you want more, you have to pay for more. Trying to figure out which ones I should transfer over (that aren't already there). (My Bloglovin' currently has more than 500 blogs on it (!) -- albeit many of them are inactive and have been for several years.) 
• Dh had a colonoscopy this morning (and is snoozing on the couch as I type). He had an easier time with the prep yesterday/this morning than I did, albeit he thought it was just as gross tasting! (Happy Father's Day!  lol)  All is well, and he doesn't have to go back for 10 years. (Unlike me, who had three polyps removed during mine in March -- benign, but I will need to return in 5 years.) 
• I subscribe to The Atlantic and follow Tom Nichols there, including his newsletter, Peacefield.  I started following him on Twitter a while back, and while I don't always agree with him politically, he's exactly the same age as me (well, about a month older, born December 1960) and I appreciate his humour and cultural references from the '70s (lol), as well as his knowledge and expertise on global matters.  His most recent newsletter, which I received the day before Father's Day, was titled "Two Fathers." 
• "We reminisce on Father’s Day about the men who raised us." he writes. "But this year, I’ve been thinking about two men who were like fathers to me. They never had children of their own, and yet helped shape me as much as my own father did. [my emphasis]  One was my uncle; the other was a teacher." Go read it;  it's lovely.  :)  

You can find more of this week's #MicroblogMondays posts here. 

#MicroblogMondays: Odds & ends

• Vaccine update: So (to recap) it’s been a full week since we (finally!) became eligible for our second shots... and we haven't heard anything from the Rexall pharmacy where we had our first shots, aside from an email  last Monday, asking us whether we'd prefer AstraZeneca again, or Pfizer. Meanwhile, I’ve been on the provincial & regional portals at least once a day to see if we could book anything there right away/earlier, but I've had absolutely no luck. (Our appointment booking system is ridiculous.)
  • Today, I called the Rexall pharmacy where we got our first shots (11 weeks ago today) and spoke to a pharmacist. She said they ARE doing AZ shots right now (!) -- but they have NO Pfizer in supply. They think they MIGHT get some next week.  
  • After that, I tried calling the Shoppers Drug Mart where we get our prescriptions filled -- and could not find a way to talk to a real live person. (eyeroll) I eventually found a website showing all the local Shoppers (it's the country's biggest drugstore chain and there are 3 or 4 within an easy drive) that are doing vaccines and indicating what they have available. Most of them say they have AZ -- but NOBODY seems to have Pfizer right now.  
  • Then I remembered there was a news story this weekend that this week's Pfizer shipment has been delayed (!) -- and so all the provincial clinics that have been offering Pfizer are using Moderna instead – and some people are turning up their noses at that. (You can’t really blame them, after being jerked around with AZ so much!) 
  • There has been a sudden influx of stories encouraging people to take the Moderna -- it's (essentially) exactly the same as Pfizer.  There ARE a few smaller pharmacies in the area that are listed as offering Moderna.  I am tempted to try for that -- but I'm afraid my mother -- who was supremely pissed off when we took AstraZeneca as our first dose, and is the main reason why we asked for Pfizer for our second shots -- would freak out over that too. (eyeroll)   Dh is inclined to wait & see if the Rexall gets any Pfizer by next week -- and if not, then look for Moderna shots elsewhere. Sigh... It will be 12 weeks since our first shots next Monday, and we just want to get these second doses DONE. 
• Sunday was Father's Day. Stores reopened last week, but we knew they'd be swamped with pent-up shoppers, and weren't anxious to join them just yet.  And so, for the second Father's Day in a row, I used a blank notecard as a makeshift card for dh (thank heaven for my obsession with pretty paper and notecards, lol -- and that I didn't get rid of all of them when we moved...!) and called my dad, and that was about it. (Dh's dad/my FIL died in August 2018.)  I told dh dinner was his pick, which turned out to be... macaroni & cheese??  (Whatever turns you on, right?)  
• Also on Sunday afternoon: another fabulous gathering of Childless Elderwomen, hosted by Jody Day of Gateway Women. Recordings of this and other past gatherings are available on the Gateway Women website. If you haven't attended/watched one yet, you are in for a treat!  :)  These sessions are timed to coincide with the seasonal solstices/equinoxes;  next one will be in September, during World Childless Week. :)  
• Jody also appeared on another podcast recently, this time in conversation with Sara Avant Stover. Excerpt, link to the full podcast and transcript available here. (I haven't listened to the podcast yet, but I did read the transcript.) 
• Interesting first-person article (by a pregnant woman) in the Toronto Star:  "Why the image of a glowing, round-bellied ‘earth mother’ is not as benign as you might think." If maternity shoot photos (including Beyonce's) are triggering for you, you might want to pass on reading this one, but there are some thoughtful observations here. Sample passage: 

Part of the problem with this sort of glorification is that it allows us, as a society, to avoid taking concrete actions to materially support what we glorify, as if the praise and the pedestal are support enough. Just as saying “being a mom is the most important job in the world” doesn’t make that job pay — and yet still makes us feel like we’ve somehow supported mothers — so revering rosy-cheeked, round-bellied, earth-mother images makes us feel like we respect what pregnant people do for society, without actually having to do anything tangible to support them...

The other problem with glorification is that it always has a flip side — for every revered virgin, there is a whore: opposed to the untouchable virgin on her pedestal, the whore is reviled and desired, but never glorified; she is intended, in fact, to be disposable. This two-sided coin of glorification and vilification — of the virgin and the whore, the earth mother and the welfare mom — leaves little room for real women living real lives, little room for humanity.

(I would suggest that perhaps the flipside of the revered earth mother is not the welfare mom, but the much-vilified childless/free woman??) 

• The New York Times had a really interesting piece on "Why American Women Everywhere Are Delaying Motherhood." Among the reasons cited:  prioritizing education and careers; the high costs of child care and housing; high levels of student debt; better access to birth control, which allows women today to control their fertility and their lives more than their mothers could;  lack of meaningful support from governments and workplaces; and today's high-stress "intensive parenting" style, which places greater demands on parents. 
• 
  Even more interesting, however, was the comments section, where (among other great points) quite a few women took the article to task for not mentioning one huge unmentioned reason:  the lack of suitable partners to have children with (and why aren't people asking MEN about why THEY are delaying fatherhood??).  I normally caution "beware the comments section!" (and there are always a few that make you roll your eyes and throw up your hands...!), but I actually found the discussion here pretty fascinating.   

You can find more of this week's #MicroblogMondays posts here.  

Odds & ends

• Season 4 finale of "The Handmaid's Tale" -- who saw it?? And what did you think?? I understand there is (at least) one more season coming... not sure what they can do to top this, although I guess there are still unresolved matters to build stories around (e.g., what happens to Serena and her baby, and to Janine, still in Gilead...).  The producers have also bought the rights to "The Testaments," Margaret Atwood's sequel (which I reviewed here), which takes place 15-20 years  later, so... 
• I caught the tail end of a documentary on CBC News Network last Saturday night called "The World's Biggest Family," about one man (filmmaker Barry Stevens)'s discovery that he was born from donor sperm -- and that he might have up to 600 (!!) half-siblings. I've seen some of Stevens's previous films on the same subject, and may go on the CBC Gem streaming service to watch the whole thing. (Spoiler alert: he is pro-disclosure and openness.)  
• It's Father's Day this weekend.  Thank you to Melissa & Erik at Live Childfree for flagging this article from the Washington Post: "Father’s Day often dredges up painful feelings for childless men like me." 
• Little Great-Nephew is (finally!) warming up to us!  He is so frickin' cute. (Not that we're prejudiced or anything, right?) On the days we visit him and his grandma (SIL), we set the alarm clock, get up early, and go over mid-morning for an hour or two before he has his lunch (he naps for a few hours after that).  
• Dh said, "Is it weird that I think about him all the time?"  I said, "Do you think anyone would ask that question if he was your grandson instead of your great-nephew?"  
• More vaccine frustration (of a different sort): a recent Toronto Star headline set my teeth on edge: "Burn in the U.S.A.: Canadians who got the AstraZeneca vaccine can’t see ‘Springsteen on Broadway.'" (Or tapings of “Saturday Night Live,” or “The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon,” apparently.) 
• Anyone attending the show, which starts on June 26th, must be fully vaccinated with an U.S. Food and Drug Administration-approved vaccine -- i.e., Pfizer, Moderna or Johnson & Johnson -- and provide proof. AstraZeneca was approved by Health Canada -- and has been widely used elsewhere, particularly in Britain -- but is not approved not by the FDA.  
• Quote: "It could also be just the beginning of bureaucratic vaccine woes, as the world starts to reopen with a patchwork of different approved shots... The no-AZ policy touches on a larger problem...: the lack of international co-ordination on a registry of acceptable vaccines, that will become more of a problem as countries start to open up again." 
• Dh & I (and more than 2 million other Canadians under the age of 65) took AZ as our first dose in good faith back in early April -- despite growing concerns about clotting issues (not to mention the disapproval of my mother, lol) -- at the urging of doctors & politicians who were worried about a rapidly rising third wave of COVID-19, and who told us "the best vaccine is the first one you can get in your arm." For us, that was AstraZeneca. Our prime minister, deputy prime minister, both federal opposition party leaders and several if not all of our provincial premiers all had AstraZeneca for their first shots too. 
• Clotting issues aside, AstraZeneca is highly effective. Maybe not *quite* as effective as the mRNA vaccines, but still pretty damned good protection. 
• It's all kind of a moot point (for now, anyway), because the U.S./Canada border has been closed since March 2020 (although there's increasing buzz on both sides about reopening soon). (And heaven knows, Springsteen tickets are hard to get at the best of times...! -- getting a second shot will probably be easier than snagging those, lol.) But it's the principle of the thing. I know there are bigger fish to fry at the moment, but our governments will have to revisit this, eventually, and work something out.
• Still no contact from the pharmacy where we got our first shots. I've popped on the provincial & regional booking sites a few times over the past several days, without success. I've heard a few people have had success simply by walking into a drugstore and asking if they have any available appointments. Perhaps we'll try that next...??  I hear there's a whole bunch of Pfizer being delivered next week, so...?? 

Father's Day/COVID-19 odds & ends

• It's Father's Day -- a very quiet, subdued one. I raided my blank card/note stash once again to make sure dh got the traditional card (at least).  Our usual Sunday afternoon activity (& especially on occasions like Mother's & Father's Day) would be to go to the movies -- but the theatres are still not open here.  It's too hot & humid (currently 30C/36C humidex) to go out for a walk, and there are too many happy families running around -- even with COVID (and without masks!) --  to venture to the bookstore or gelato shop. If we wanted to head to a store, we'd both rather do it during the week when it's quieter. 
• I suppose we could have gone to the cemetery to visit FIL (& MIL), or further down the road to visit Katie in her cemetery (haven't been there since February -- I think her Christmas decorations are still up...!) -- but it's at least a 30-45-minute drive (one way) on a very hot day, with little else we could do once we got there, with so many closures & restrictions in place. Another time. 
• I'll call my own dad later this afternoon. 
• Dh admitted last night that he sometimes gets jealous of BIL and his obvious pleasure in being a grandfather. BIL has a huge heart, and he's always been very generous about including us in things and assuring us that we are an important part of the family, that we have an important role to play in the lives of his sons & grandson (our two nephews and great-nephew). But like most parents/grandparents, he can be kind of clueless sometimes. ;)  

*** *** *** 

COVID-19/pandemic updates: 

• En route to BIL's for a visit on Friday night, we stopped at the supermarket to pick up something from the bakery to have with our coffee. I waited in the car while dh put on a mask and went in. I've barely been outside at all in the past three months, let alone anywhere where there's lots of people. So it was kind of jaring to see that the parking lot was packed -- it WAS rush hour on a Friday night. I was also shocked at how many people were NOT wearing masks -- and had (unmasked) kids in tow with them too!  Dh says most people have been masked when he's been there grocery shopping -- but of course he normally goes early in the morning, when it's far less busy.  
• In a similar vein -- local restaurants are still not allowed to open their dining rooms, but as of Friday, they *are* now allowed to offer outdoor/patio dining (with social distancing & other precautions), in addition to takeout & delivery. We ordered takeout from one of our favourite restaurants on Saturday night and, when he returned with our food, dh reported the patio was PACKED, with a long line of people waiting. No masks to be seen there either.  I know you can't wear masks and eat ;)  but you would think people might want to wear masks until their food arrives, or at least while they're waiting in line...?? 
• And finally.... the time is drawing near!!  After SEVENTEEN (17!!) weeks, we will FINALLY be getting haircuts on Friday afternoon!!  Our stylist called me (this past) Friday afternoon to let us know her new schedule, and I booked our appointments on the spot. She explained that we must call when we arrive, and someone will unlock the door to let us in -- one at a time (the other person will have to wait in the car, or elsewhere outside). No purses allowed -- just a cellphone & payment method (presumably credit or debit card).  Masks must be worn -- we can bring our own or buy a disposable one for $1. The capes are now disposable as well.  She will only wet our hair with water from a spray bottle (vs a complete shampoo -- which they will only do if you're having colour done), and she will not blow dry our hair. Fine with me -- just get out those scissors, lol. As I have said before -- I have no great desire to go to the mall or a restaurant or whatever -- but I am desperate for a haircut!  

Friday/First day of summer odds & ends

• I can't believe it's (supposedly?) summer, and that we're already through 2/3 of June. It hasn't been much of a spring/summer so far, sadly... temps cooler than average, not a lot of sunshine and a fair bit of rain. :p  (Today is pretty nice, though!)  
• We had planned to spend Father's Day afternoon at the movies last weekend, but BIL invited us over there for lunch and dh said OK.  The nephews & their wives were there, as well as SIL's elderly father & her brother. It was a lovely lunch & we enjoyed the time with the nephews (& the dog, lol) -- even though there was a LOT of baby talk...! 
• No plans for this weekend, although we may try to go see "Late Night" with Emma Thompson & Mindy Kaling. 
• Lots of posts & photos about kids' graduations/"moving up" ceremonies/last days of school in my social media feeds. Sigh. 
• My 40th (!!) high school class reunion is this weekend. (There are already some photos on our class Facebook group.)  I'm not going -- we're heading that way in a couple of weeks to visit my family & celebrate my dad's 80th birthday, and I didn't think I could stretch the visit that far (let alone make two trips in such a short time frame). I'm sure I would have had an OK time if I'd gone, but I don't think my absence will be much noticed. As I said previously:  

I wouldn't MIND going -- I'm certainly curious to see how everyone's turned out ;)  -- but I'm not dying to go either.  Having to explain my childlessness/only daughter's stillbirth (umpteen times, I'm sure...) is certainly a factor in my reluctance.... I'm not sure I would be the ONLY person there without kids -- but I'd definitely be in the minority.  And nevermind the kids -- I know many of my classmates are now (gulp) grandparents!  I only have so much tolerance for admiring other people's kid/grandkid photos & listening to their stories... particularly when they never seem to be very interested in my own.

• Also coming up soon:  our 34th wedding anniversary. Not sure how we're going to celebrate. Dinner out, at least. :)  Likely something more next year for #35. :) 

#MicroblogMondays: Father's Day weekend odds & ends

• Yesterday was Father's Day, and as usual, I told dh the day's agenda was his to determine. We decided to go see "The Incredibles 2" (we both enjoyed the original movie enormously) -- even though it was opening weekend, which we normally try to avoid. But although we arrived in plenty of time, the local multiplex was swarming with parents & kids, and when I went to purchase tickets, I learned that (even though we just wanted to see the plain vanilla version -- no 3D, no AVX, no IMAX, no D-Box, etc.) there was assigned seating -- and all that was left was the very front row. :p  We said thanks but no thanks, bought some popcorn to munch on en route home, and left. Will try again in another week or two, when the crowds have (hopefully) thinned out... 
• We went home, and dh promptly fell asleep on the couch. When he woke up, he proclaimed he'd had a great day. (?!!) Whatever makes him happy, I guess...!  ;)     
• We went to visit FIL on Saturday with BIL, SIL, the nephews & their wives (boy, it feels weird typing that...!).  He was not as good as he was when we saw him last week. Still recognizes dh & BIL, recognized SIL (asked her how her own aging father was), but I'm not sure he knew me, and he didn't seem to recognize his grandsons, let alone the girls. :(  
• SIL found out late last week that she will be losing her job as of Sept. 1st. I won't go into all the details, since her story is not really mine to share -- but she is 53 & has been with her company 28 years;  I lost my job when *I* was 53 & just one month shy of 28 years of service. Eerie, huh?  :(  
• The nephews were highly indignant on their mom's behalf. Oldest Nephew said his mom should forget about finding another job and just retire. SIL told him bluntly she couldn't afford to just yet. I suppose Oldest Nephew was thinking of dh & me, retiring after losing our jobs in our mid-50s. But of course, unlike his parents, we didn't raise two children and just finish paying for (part of) two big weddings...!  
• After a couple of months of prolific blogging (15 posts in March, 17 in April, 18 in May...), I seem to be in a bit of a slump again. But that's OK. I've been blogging long enough to know the muse comes and goes. 
• One of these days, I will write a #MM post that's not made up of bullet points, lol. (But today isn't it...!)  

You can find more of this week's #MicroblogMondays posts here.

#MicroblogMondays: Odds & ends

• It seems I am in one of those blogging lulls that rears its head every now & then, where my mind is as blank as the screen in front of me and nothing (or very little) comes to mind to write about, ALI-related or otherwise. I haven't finished any books lately to review. I couldn't even muster up an 8-line #MicroblogMondays post last week. :( Thankfully, these lulls have never lasted too long in the past. (In almost 10 years of blogging, there's never been a month when I haven't posted at least once;  I think two or three posts in one month would be my lowest point.) I trust that this lull will also end, eventually. ;)   
• Hop over to Sue Fagalde Lick's Childless by Marriage blog for the most believe-it-or-not story I think I've heard yet about pronatalism run amok (with the childless woman, as usual, getting the short end of the stick...!)...! (As you might remember, I just came through a long string of dental work myself, so this had me completely cringing...!!) 
• After plowing through season one of "The Crown" on our new Netflix, my next pick was "The Keepers." I devoured all seven episodes over two nights this past week. I love a good true crime story/mystery, and this was extremely well done. As I watched, I realized that my great-aunt had lived in Baltimore during the time the events shown unfolded, and her daughter (my mother's cousin) was the same age as the women in the program -- both she & her husband graduated from (public) high school there in the early 1970s. Beyond the compelling mystery, I absolutely loved seeing all these ordinary 60-something women driving the investigation forward (and doing a better job of it than the police!). And seeing their classmates rise from the ashes of horrible abuse to heal and help others -- one even went back to school in her late 40s and became a lawyer! Girl power, indeed!! :)  Anyone else watch it? 
• I just watched episode 9 of "The Handmaid's Tale" on Bravo Canada last night (episode 10/season finale next Sunday night). There was a scene in the kitchen between Serena Joy, the Commander's wife, and Martha/Rita, the housekeeper/maid that resonated with me: Serena complains that Naomi Putnam (the wife of another commander) has been complaining that her (Handmaid Janine/Ofwarren's) baby girl has been keeping her up at night, since Janine/Ofwarren's departure. "She shouldn't complain about such a blessing," the two women agree bitterly.  (Oh boy, does this sound familiar...)   
• Of course (MAJOR SPOILER ALERT!!), the main, climactic event of this episode was poor Janine's leap off the bridge, despite Offred/June's best efforts to talk her down. 
• From the Harper's Bazaar recap of this episode:  "Janine was never really going to jump off that bridge with her baby [not so sure about that myself...], but by taking the baby up there with her, she ensured she’d be given the chance to say her piece. A fitting visual reminder of the fact that a woman’s life in Gilead only has value when she’s carrying a baby."  (Boldfaced emphasis theirs, not mine.)  
• From the Baltimore Sun's recap:  "...in this week’s most horrifying moment, we realize that Janine is being kept alive on a thread, if only because she is still a fertile woman who can bear Gilead future children. And if you think they would have made any effort had she been infertile, you have been watching a very different television program that I also may be interested in recapping."  
• Yet another person I know & love has been diagnosed with breast cancer. :(  Her prognosis is good, but still... It's getting scary how many women I know who have fought this battle over the past couple of years. Fuck cancer. :p 
• Over Father's Day weekend, we went to visit FIL, and I called my own dad. There were no movies dh wanted to see on Sunday (our usual choice of avoidance activity on these occasions), and he didn't have any other ideas about how he wanted to spend the day, so I suggested a little road trip to visit Katie. :)  We drove to the cemetery -- which was very busy, but not in the section where she is, thankfully. Then we went for lunch to a little cafe we used to frequent when we lived in the area (they make great chicken caesar wraps), and then to our old favourite haunt, the local mega-bookstore. :)  And then home again. 
• And there... a  post! ;)  (When in doubt, try bullet points, lol.)  So much for blogger's block...! ;)
• ETA:  And, bonus!  Apparently this is post #1,200!! Yikes!! 

You can find more of this week's #MicroblogMondays posts here.

Odds & ends

• My life is consumed with transitions lately, it seems. I still feel like we're not quite settled into our condo. Partly, I think, that's because we have furniture on order that won't be delivered until at least the end of the month. And we've been waiting to bring out & arrange our photos and other knick-knacks until then. (Yes, more boxes to unpack...!)
• We did paint a couple of weekends ago (for those of you wondering, I settled on the blue paint), and that helped make the condo feel a little more our own.
• Of course, the sofa we subsequently bought, from a fabric swatch, was more khaki/greenish than the grey/taupe-ish I expected -- and now I'm thinking I should have gone with the greyer shade of paint...!  :p  I am currently rethinking my colour scheme and the decorative knick-knacks I was planning to buy.
• My body is also in transition these days.  I've been having some weird (peri)menopausal/gynecological stuff going on again lately -- cramping & spotting almost every day for well over a week after the main event of AF's visit (some days better/worse than others). (Thankfully, and knocking wood, things seem to have -- finally -- settled down again now.)  The ultrasound I had done in April raised no real alarms -- but the tech did note one area that was difficult to see clearly, where she thought there might be a slight thickening in the uterine lining. I went for my regular checkup with Dr. Ob-Gyn a few weeks ago and he thinks there's nothing to worry about, but he's agreed to send me back for another u/s in the fall for comparison, to ease my mind. 
• We have been for gelato three times over the past three weekends. If I don't gain 300 lbs. living here, it will be a miracle.
• A friend posted photos on FB of sending her son off to nursery school, 15 years ago -- and picking him up on his very last day of school Friday. It hadn't hit me before that he too is Katie's age & graduating high school this month. One more reminder I didn't need. :p  Two more weeks to go in June, and it should all be over, yes??!  :p 
• It's Father's Day. We went to see FIL last night, I Skyped with my dad this morning, and left the rest of today's agenda entirely up to dh.  Which meant an earlier trip to the bookstore (natch! ;) ), a roast simmering in the crockpot for dinner (yum!), golf on the TV, and dh napping on the couch as I type. ;)   Ahhhh, Sundays. :) 

#Asanonparent, here's what I think....

So, Peter McKay, Canada's federal Minister of Justice and (not insignificantly) new dad, has been having a rough few weeks.

First, he made some comments about why so few women are being appointed federal judges -- namely, that they simply aren't applying because of the "special bond" they have with their children.

Then, he got into a Twitter war with Liberal leader Justin Trudeau, objecting to Trudeau's mention of legalizing marijuana to a group of students with a tweeted protest that began, "As a parent..."  This prompted a flurry of sarcastic responses under the hashtag #asaparent. (As I commented to Pamela at Silent Sorority, it reminded me of how she used to take articles that used the phrase "as a mom…” and then change them to “as an infertile…” -- sometimes with hilarious results.)

Then, some of McKay's messages to his staff members to mark Mother's Day & Father's Day were compared and contrasted -- and found wanting.  As reported in the Globe & Mail: 

Mr. MacKay’s Mother’s Day message to Justice Department staff, in recognizing those who hold “two full-time jobs” as colleagues and as mothers and caregivers, said that by the time many of them reach the office, they have “already changed diapers, packed lunches, run after school buses, dropped kids off at daycare, taken care of an aging loved one and maybe even thought about dinner.”

By contrast, the Father’s Day message spoke of “dedicated fathers, shaping the minds and futures of the next generation of leaders.” In both the Mother’s and Father’s Day messages, and in his meeting with the Ontario lawyers, he cited what he’d learned from his own experience as the married father of a toddler.

The more I thought about it (#asanonparent), the more I wondered about two things that nobody else seemed to be mentioning or asking: 

(a)  Since when have bosses started issuing workplace messages to their employees related to Mother's Day & Father's Day?  (The only holiday I can ever remember where the higher-ups issued some kind of message or commentary was Christmas/New Year's/"the holidays" -- and that was abandoned quite some time ago.) 

And,

(b)  How many of the minister's staff members don't have children (quite a few, I would guess) -- and what words of praise & wisdom & recognition did he have to offer them?

McKay is still in his 40s, newly married to a highly accomplished woman and, as noted, a new dad.  Presumably, he should know better.  On the other hand, consider the party he belongs to and the company he keeps...

On the plus side, these events have inspired some great comment & opinion pieces in the press.
There's Tabitha Southey's wry commentary in the Globe & Mail: 

Compound all that with the self-righteous “As a parent...” and we have Russian nesting dolls of wrongness! As if people without children have no desire to see the country run well. Were all the minister’s opinions suspect before the birth of his son a year ago?...

But in general, and I say this as a parent, lots of us are morons, and those who sling our children about like moral cudgels are in the wrong – and what a vast land Mr. MacKay is proving the wrong to be!

...Basically, to hear Minister MacKay explain it, our Federal Courts are run by dozens of baby-eating Greek Titans – it’s all Kronoses over there with the occasional Joan Crawford thrown in.

And (needless to say) I adored this piece by Susan Delacourt in the Toronto Star, with insights such as:

...perhaps we should be asking how parenthood has become some kind of blanket assurance of noble motives in politics. Or why we assume that the mere fact of having children — not exactly a unique condition in human experience — gives a person a heightened capacity for compassion.

For parents or non-parents, isn’t the true test of empathy your ability to see yourself in someone else’s shoes — someone who doesn’t look or act or live like you? On this score, we have no reason to believe that Canadian parents are more, or less, caring than any other kind of people in the population.

...Being a parent is without a doubt something to celebrate, but it shouldn’t be a stick to whack political opponents. Nor should it be the price of admission to a conversation about what’s best for Canadian families — with kids or without them.

Amen!

Father's Day odds & ends

• It's Father's Day... not quite as much hyped as Voldemort Day, a month earlier, but still an "ouch" moment for dh & his kindred bereaved dads.
• We visited Kate at the cemetery yesterday, and then went to FIL's last night.
• Given his choice of how to spend the day, dh & I went to see "Man of Steel," the new Superman movie. I thought the violence & destruction went on (& on... & on... & on...) way, way too long. On the bright side, however, Henry Cavill fills out the suit quite nicely. ; ) (Even dh thought so, lol.)
• It is, in part, a story about adoption & a boy's search for identity & belonging -- and it was this aspect of the movie that probably touched me the most.  Sent as a baby by his doomed parents from a dying planet, Kal-El crash-lands in the field of a Kansas farm couple, who raise him. When Dad (Kevin Costner) fiercely tells young Kal-El/Clark, "You ARE my son," I got tears in my eyes.  
• Last year at about this time, I was in the throes of rediscovering one of the power pop bands I'd loved as a teenager, The Raspberries. Right now, I'm having fun rediscovering yet another band from the soundtrack of my childhood, the Rascals. At the behest of their biggest fan, Steve van Zandt (of Bruce Springsteen's band & The Sopranos TV show), the four original band members recently reunited on Broadway for a combination concert/multimedia production called "Once Upon a Dream." It's coming to Toronto in August for 10 shows, & I got tickets this week for me & dh. : )   From the reviews I've read, the music ("Groovin," "Good Loving,""How Can I Be Sure," People Got to Be Free," etc. etc.) still holds up (& these guys are pushing 70). 
• Why the Rascals? As I've mentioned before, "The Best of Herman's Hermits Vol. 2" was the first album I ever owned -- a present for my 6th birthday. Not too far behind, however, my sister & I received "Groovin" by the Young Rascals (as they were called then) as a gift, either from my grandparents (!) or (perhaps more likely) my uncle. I know the well-worn album is still somewhere in the depths of my parents' basement;  until I can dig it out again, I've been listening to the audio tracks that some kind soul uploaded to YouTube, as well as exploring other songs and video performances -- and having a blast doing so. ; )  Even though I haven't heard some of the songs in at least 30 years, I find I can still sing along. There truly is no music like the stuff you grew up with, is there?
• I will leave you with one of my favourite songs from the album (as sung on what seems to be the Ed Sullivan Show):  

Father's Day

Since I shared an old photo of my mom, sister & I on Mother's Day, I thought I'd do the same for Father's Day. This photo was taken in the early/mid-1960s,when I was about 4. I'm on the right & my sister is on the left, holding our one & only puppy, Honey. (This is one of only two photos we have of her.) She proved too much of a handful (the dog -- not my sister -- although she has proved to be a handful in her own right over the years, lol) & we took her to my grandparents' farm on our next visit there -- where she was run over by a car some months later. :(

It was my first encounter with death. I remember my mother holding me as I cried & cried. She told me that Honey was in heaven. I asked if there would be lots of bones for Honey to eat there, & dogs for her to play with, and she assured me yes. That made me feel better.

*** *** ***

My dad was typical of many dads of my generation, I think. He worked hard, long hours, to provide for our family. (He still works -- albeit part-time now -- even though he's almost 71. I don't think he'd know what to do with himself otherwise.) But he was a fun dad too -- wrestling on the living room floor with me & my sister, building tents with us out of TV trays, blankets & sofa cushions, making popcorn for us on Sunday nights to eat while we watched Ed Sullivan, taking us to the general store in our PJs to buy us Revels (chocolate-covered ice cream bars). My mother was the disciplinarian, & her rants & threats were something we were used to. My dad seldom got angry with us -- but when he did, man, was that effective.

My dad had an emotional side that I only became aware of as I grew up. I had never witnessed him crying until his own mother passed away, when I was 14. It was (& still is) the worst thing in the world for me to witness. The day after my wedding, my new husband & I were preparing to leave my parents' house to return to the city, & from there head off on our honeymoon, & then to our new life in Toronto. Saying goodbye to my parents, my dad broke down in tears. It startled me. It hadn't really hit me until that moment that I was really leaving home for good.

When our daughter -- his first and only grandchild -- was stillborn, he couldn't even speak to me on the phone. My mother flew to be with us & was there when I delivered our Katie, & helped us plan the funeral. Dad arrived a few days later, as they had originally planned for their holidays. In the interim, he played in a golf tournament that he takes part in every year. Initially, I was a little peeved -- was a golf tournament more important than his granddaughter?? On second thought, though, I realized maybe that was the best thing for him to be doing at that point.

One of the hardest things about Katie's funeral was seeing my dad standing by her niche at the cemetery, his shoulders heaving, wiping his eyes.

We're not a family that says it out loud a lot. We tend to submerge our true feelings behind layers of sarcasm & wisecracks.

But I love you, Daddy. You're the best. : )

*** *** ***

The Toronto Star profiled four fathers-to-be in today's paper, talking about what kind of fathers they want to be, their hopes & plans for the future (trips already in the works to see grandparents and go to Hawaii in December, plans to celebrate both Jewish & Christian holidays, etc.). I guess it's the dead baby mama in me (still), but I couldn't help but wonder at the supreme confidence of both the fathers and the paper in running such a story.

I wish them all well and I hope all their plans come to fruition.

*** *** ***

I left today's agenda entirely up to dh. We saw his dad last night, & visited our Katie at the cemetery (he thought it would be too sad to go there today). We thought about going to see "Toy Story 3," but kiddie movie on Father's Day (not to mention opening weekend) sounded like a recipe for disaster, so we've decided to wait a few weeks for that. We went out briefly to our favourite megabookstore but have otherwise spent the day lazing around the house. (I've even let him have the computer for awhile, lol.)

I think we both need it. We're gearing up for what may be a difficult & stressful week, (absolutely no) thanks to the G-20 meeting a few blocks away from where we work. Potential havoc may be played with our commute, particularly as the week wears on. We've been advised to carry food & water with us -- but not to drink TOO much, since most of the washrooms on board the trains may be locked for security reasons. Wonderful. :p

Wish us luck...!!

Father's Day 2008

It's Father's Day and, having paid homage to FIL last night, dh & I have been free to spend the day exactly as we (ummm, HE) pleases. I gave him a card this morning, as is our tradition. We watched Meet the Press's memorial tribute to Tim Russert this morning (as a communicator & former print reporter, I loved to watch him in action!), then went to the cemetery to visit our daughter's niche -- then to Tim Hortons for coffee & bagels, Chapters for a browse, grocery shopping & then home. He's happily settled on the couch for the afternoon, watching golf, & has requested lasagna for dinner. I am happy to oblige.

My own father actually called me last night to say he & my mom were heading out of town for a few days. My parents are still in their 60s & not long retired (my dad actually still works part-time). They married very young -- my mom was 19 & my dad was just two days past his 21st birthday & so able to sign all the paperwork legally for himself. In some ways, my dad was typical of his generation. He was a branch banker, eventually rising to the rank of branch manager, & spent long hours at the office. He wasn't as involved as dads today are with their kids. My mother was by far the more central figure in my daily life.

At the same time, he was not a remote figure. When we were toddlers, he would wrestle with me & my sister, & help us build tents on the living room floor out of sofa cushions, TV trays & blankets. He was everyone's favourite uncle, playing ball with my cousins & tossing them high in the air until they got too big to do that anymore (he would have made a fabulous doting grandfather). He'd make popcorn for us every Sunday night to eat while we watched Ed Sullivan as a family, & in later years, took on the roles of barbecuer in chief and Sunday brunch chef extraordinaire.

While my mother would often rant & rave over various things my sister & I had done, my father would remain largely silent. But whenever he did mad about something, boy, you paid attention. I never saw him cry until I was 14 & his mother, my grandmother, died suddenly at the far too young age of 68. It was, & still is, the worst thing in the world for me to witness.

There's been some good reading over the last few days on Father's Day & fatherhood and, a la Mel's Friday blog roundup, I wanted to share a few of them with you. I've read several bloggers in the last few days who mentioned their dhs & wondered why Father's Day wasn't receiving the same amount of hype as Mother's Day typically gets. Today's Toronto Star had an interesting article on this topic, the online version of which is titled "Why doesn't Father's Day matter more?"

In yesterday's Saturday Star, there was a piece on fatherhood after infertility, focusing on a local fertility doctor (not mine) who has helped make some family's dreams come true. Nice to see infertility being profiled through male eyes for once.

I enjoyed Nicholas Kristoff's piece in today's Sunday New York Times about his troubled relationship with his father, titled, The Man Who Wasn't There. I was especially struck by this paragraph, & of course immediately thought of all the bereaved dads out there who have their own brand of "paternal shadows" hanging over them:

"Most of my friends who grew up happily with their dads think of Father’s Day as a contrived holiday. It’s the people with paternal shadows for whom the third Sunday in June takes hold. So it’s not surprising, I guess, that those who are missing out on culturally signified occasions — the loveless on Valentine’s Day; the lonely on Thanksgiving — are the ones who are most affected."

I normally don't spend much time in the sports section, & have zero interest in the NFL, but I was taken with this story about DeMarcus Ware of the Dallas Cowboys & his wife, & their struggle to have a family. I'm sure you'll find yourself nodding your head throughout the story, as I did.

Whether your children are here on earth, on their way, in heaven, or just a proverbial gleam in your eye, happy Father's Day to all the fathers out there.