Odds & ends (including a World Childless Week webinar!)

I've been struggling a bit lately, with writing more regularly in this blog -- and with other parts of my life too. It feels like there are a gazillion things demanding my attention, and all I want to do is bury my nose in a book (Kobo reader?) or my phone and scroll mindlessly. I bounce from one thing to another and accomplish nothing, and fret over the dumbest little things. Frankly, I think I might be a little depressed -- and I guess it's not surprising, given the events and stresses and losses around me this past year(s/) -- both personal and in the broader world. 

Writing IS (always has been) a comfort and an outlet, though, and I have been collecting more odds & ends to share with you here (albeit there are a lot I meant to flag that have slipped through my fingers). Here are a few things I've been noticing and thinking about lately:   

• Latest annoying/anxiety-inducing thing:  Our GE Profile dishwasher (original to the condo, so likely about 12 years old) is leaking water from the bottom. :(  We've stopped using it (washing dishes by hand), and even turned off the valve to shut off the water to it, but it's still getting wet under there. 
• I've been sliding rags or sheets of paper towel underneath to catch and mop up the drips, and swapping them out for dry ones every few hours. 
• Beyond the leak, the springs on both sides of the door have snapped in recent years -- meaning we can't just open the door and let it drop (because it DROPS!) -- we have to either hold it or balance it against a hip and load/unload the dishes that way -- or lower the door very gently, and then rehook the hinges up to close it back up properly again. 
• Given these issues (and the likelihood of more to come), and given that 12 years seems to be ancient in appliance terms these days (yikes), we recently went dishwasher shopping. What to pick, from a dizzying array of choices?? (Did I mention I've been having some anxiety issues lately??)  
• We eventually selected a KitchenAid model. It's being delivered next Monday. 
• (I had to notify the property manager of the impending delivery -- and cough up a $500 (Canadian) security deposit in case of damages to the elevator or hallways during delivery/removal of the old machine. It will be returned, assuming all goes well. Sigh...) 
• Huge congratulations to Mali at No Kidding in NZ, who has been named People's Champion for World Childless Week 2026!!  She wrote about it here, and you can read her WCW profile here  So well deserved!!  
• Speaking of World Childless Week, it's next week!  I'll be writing more about it in the days ahead, but I especially wanted to give you a heads-up that I'll be appearing in a Zoom webinar/panel discussion on Thursday, Sept. 17th at 9 AM (Eastern time), along with three of my friends from the Childless Collective:  "All in the Family: Childless women, Caregiving/Caring and Family of Origin Dynamics." 
• Y'all know, I live some 1000 miles away from my family of origin -- and my (younger) sister has been the main point person as our parents have aged (and, in mom's case, passed away in January). But Sandy, the webinar organizer, thought it would be interesting to have my perspective on caregiving and contributing from a distance, so...! 
• You can watch live on Zoom, and the video will be posted on the WCW 2026 website and YouTube channel later that day for later viewing. More details and a sign-up link here.  
• We lost three childless/free icons in short order recently:  first Dolly Parton, then Tim Curry, followed by Gloria Steinem. (Did I mention I've been a bit depressed lately?? -- this didn't help...!) There's been some great writing on various childless/free blogs, etc., about these three and what they meant to us. 
• Gloria Steinem in particular was a familiar presence when I was growing up in the 1970s. Going through my old school essays when we were cleaning out my parents' house last spring, I was amused to find a declaration in one along the lines of "I'm not a big women's libber" -- ah, youth!!  Even if I was reluctant to embrace the F-label as a teenager (lol), there's absolutely no doubt what a huge impact Steinem and the women's movement had on my life, and that I have evolved considerably since then.  ;)  
• I was fortunate enough to briefly encounter Gloria Steinem twice in my life:  
• In 1994, I stood in line at a bookstore in the underground city that runs below Toronto's Financial District during my lunch hour to get her to sign a copy of her latest book, "Moving Beyond Words" (which I still have).  
• Several years after that, she was speaking at a convention of the Ontario Human Resources Professionals Association. Someone had given one of my coworkers tickets;  she was working, but my mom was visiting me and I was off that week, so she gave them to me and Mom & I went to the Toronto Convention Centre to hear Gloria speak.  We also caught a glimpse of her walking through the halls outside the meeting rooms. She was in her 60s then and wearing a miniskirt -- and she looked fabulous in it.  :)   Rest in power, Gloria. And thank you. 
• I was sad to read in the Toronto Star that Gilda's Club recently closed its doors here. 
• I was reminded of a post I wrote wayyyyyy back in 2012 (!) about Gilda Radner (who was childless not by choice) & Gilda's Club. (I also mentioned Gilda in this post from last year, about the Saturday Night Live 50th anniversary celebrations.) 
• Sidenote:  The O'Keefe Centre/Hummingbird Centre/Sony Centre I refer to in that 2012 post has been Meridian Hall since 2019.  Sigh... 
• (The SkyDome is still the Rogers Centre -- but there's now also the Rogers Stadium, which -- as many unsuspecting event ticketholders have discovered, to their dismay! -- is about 20 miles away from the Rogers Centre, in a completely different part of the city...!) 
• New York Times gift link:  "When the Choice to Be Childless Is Not Your Own" by Anna Louise Sussman, author of the upcoming book “Inconceivable:The Impossibility of Family in an Age of Uncertainty.” The article is U.S.-specific, but some of the questions it raises would apply in many other countries. 
• Sample quote:  "...what if we thought of starting a family as a fundamental human experience that should be available to all? What if we extended the ability to have a family — one that many possess as a matter of good fortune — into a basic human right?"
• (Not sure I have the "right" to have a family -- no one can guarantee that -- but I believe it should be a lot easier to TRY to have one, if that's what I want...)
• You've probably heard of "manspreading" -- entitled and oblivious men, spreading out and taking up valuable public space (particularly on public transit). How about "mumspreading"?  Emma Harris thoughtfully explains (on her own website, and on the Life Without Children Substack -- well worth a read!):   

Mumspreading, as I use it, describes something analogous: the ways in which some mums can take up physical, conversational, emotional space without much awareness of the impact on those around them.

This is, ultimately, a post about the invisible grief of childlessness, and what it means to take up space in a world not designed with you in mind.

#MicroblogMondays: Odds & ends

• 
  (Once again, odds & ends for #MM -- but hey, it's what I've got right now...!  In no particular order:) 
• It's our Thanksgiving long weekend here, and we enjoyed a nice dinner at BIL & SIL's on Saturday with the nephews & their families. 
• The Halloween goodie bags I assembled for the great-niblings were a hit!  LGNephew #1 exclaimed over the Robert Munsch book I'd chosen for him ("Boo!")  and gave me a big hug (awww...), and he and LGNiece donned their Halloween deelybobbers -- LGNephew #2 was less enchanted, lol. LGNephew #1 changed into his new glow-in-the-dark Halloween PJs to wear in the car before they left, and LGNephew #2 was sporting one of the new onesies I'd bought for him in photos posted by Older Nephew's wife the next day.  Success!!  (On to shopping for birthdays and Christmas...!  lol)  
• Still not a lot of autumn colours to be seen hereabouts! -- especially when I look at photos taken at this time of year in years past. I think it's because we had such a warm September -- no frosts to date (although we came close a couple of mornings last week!).   
• I was sad to hear the actress Diane Keaton had died at age 79 (what??!).  
• I know Woody Allen is considered completely politically incorrect/taboo these days -- but I came of age watching his movies, many of them co-starring Diane Keaton, and I still love many of them:  "Annie Hall," "Love and Death," "Play it Again Sam," :Manhattan" (yeah, it's creepy seeing him with a very young Mariel Hemingway -- but that Gershwin score! that gorgeous black-and-white cinematography!!). 
• "Annie Hall" came out just as I was heading into my last year of high school -- and the "Annie Hall" look was HUGE that year. With the money I'd earned that summer working part-time at the local drive-in movie theatre and an antique shop, I bought a new Annie-esque outfit (mostly at Fairweathers at the long-gone Unicity Mall) that I wore to my first day of school that fall:  a plaid knife-pleated skirt that fell below the knees; black thigh-high, high-heeled boots;  a white shirt, black men's tie, salmon-pink sweater vest, and grey flannel blazer. (I think I still have the tie!)
• I loved so many more of her movies too: "The Godfather" movies with Al Pacino (one of her (other) famous lovers);  "Reds," with Warren Beatty (ditto)(which I saw on my 21st birthday at a grand old movie palace in downtown Winnipeg -- en route out, I begged the theatre manager for one of the posters, which hung in my dorm room for the rest of my university career);  "Baby Boom" with the incredibly sexy Sam Shepard (although I imagine I would find the plot pretty wince-inducing these days...!);  "Something's Gotta Give" with Jack Nicholson and Keanu Reeves;  "The First Wives Club" with Goldie Hawn and Bette Midler....   
• Keaton never married, but she adopted two children, a daughter and a son, when she was in her early 50s. (!) They would be in their 20s now, I think. 
• About 20-25 years ago, she was making a movie that was partly filmed in the small Manitoba town where my parents live. My mother told me that Keaton went in to the local Co-op grocery store with curlers in her hair (!), and the young checkout girl, not knowing who she was, asked her for her Co-op number (lolol).  I hope Keaton was as tickled by that story as we were. Hollywood pretentious she was not.  :)  
• Jennifer Aniston, poster girl/heroine for those of us who tried and didn't succeed at having the children we wanted, talks about that time in her life (among other things) in Harpers Bazaar UK's November issue. 
• Aniston previously spoke out on these matters in Allure's December 2022 issue.  I wrote about it (and the reaction to it in the CNBC community), here and here. So grateful for her honesty! 
• Nicole Chung -- who was adopted -- writes in The Atlantic about "When Adoption Promises are Broken." What happens when open adoption arrangements are not honoured? 
• As someone who knows a major cleanout of her parents' home of 40+ years (after 65+ years of marriage) is coming sooner vs later, I appreciated this Substack post from Catriona Innes of "Crocuses in the snow":  "When possessions hold memories, how do we choose what to throw away?"
• Simon Haisell at Footnotes & Tangents has announced 5 new slow readalongs for 2026, plus the return of both "War and Peace" and "Wolf Crawl "(Hilary Mantel's Cromwell Trilogy). (I took part in both W&P and Wolf Crawl in 2024, and highly recommend the experience!) I'll likely be reading along with at least some if not all of these! 
• Back in late August, drowning in back-to-school/off to college/empty nest social media posts from my mom friends, I read an article from The Atlantic about "How Parents Hijacked the College Dorm" -- and, in response, wrote a lengthy post reminiscing about my own college dorm rooms (vintage 1979 photo included!).   
• This past week, Anne Helen Petersen at "Culture Study" did a deep dive into the subject with Meagan Francis (who wrote The Atlantic article):  "What's Really Going on With Those Elaborate (Parent-Decorated) College Dorm Rooms?" The conversation was fascinating (photos included!), and so are the comments!  I believe it's not (currently?) paywalled. 
• As an avid genealogist, I absolutely loved this story when I first stumbled onto it in the New York Times three years ago (already?!):  "‘Downton Shabby': A Commoner Takes on an English Castle."  (Gift linked article.  And there's a book by the same name!)   Here's the lede: 

People who search genealogy websites often find birth and marriage records, newspaper clippings, faded photographs or maybe a long-lost relative.

Hopwood DePree found a 60-room English manor.

• It's not QUITE a "castle" -- but it's a 50,000 square-foot mansion (!), with some sections dating back to the 1400s (!). Hopwood Hall had been abandoned and derelict for decades -- but when he flew from his home in California to England to see it, Hopwood DePree recognized its value and its potential -- and he's rallied the community to save and restore the property.  
• This past week, I found a series of related video shorts from Ancestry.com on YouTube, featuring Hopwood DePree and Hopwood Hall.  Here's a link to the first episode.  They're also reposted on his Facebook & Instagram accounts, which I'm now following! 
• (I haven't looked at everything yet, but apparently, the estate is currently embroiled in some sort of dispute over the land surrounding the house that's delayed further progress on the restoration. Hopefully it will be resolved soon!) 

You can find more of this week's #MicroblogMondays posts here. 

Odds & ends for the weekend

• I had kind of forgotten that Liza Minnelli is "one of us."  Then I got watching a documentary about her this week, from "American Masters" on PBS -- "Liza:  A Truly Terrific Absolutely True Story" -- and they included a whole segment about how much she had wanted to have children, her multiple miscarriages, and how much she doted on her friends' children (and, later, grandchildren).There was a lot about her life that I'd forgotten (or never knew). She's a legend for a reason. Worth a watch, if you can find it! 
• Princess Beatrice of England recently wrote for Vogue UK about the premature birth of her daughter Athena in January. 
• In The Atlantic, Ashley Parker ponders "Miscarriage and Motherhood: What having a baby taught me about the illusion of control."  (Gift link.) 
• Like I needed one more book to add to my "to-read" list....!  Nevertheless, I was intrigued by this (mostly glowing) New York Times review of "Firstborn," a pregnancy loss memoir by Lauren Christensen. (NYT gift link.)  
• Lisa Kissane grapples with the eternal question of labels: "Am I Childless, Childfree or a Proxy-Parent? And why does it even matter?" 
• In her Substack "Mad Woman," Amanda Montei ponders the "is motherhood good or bad" debate -- and a recent iteration, featuring the singer Chappell Roan. 
• The whole piece is worth a read -- but I especially appreciate that it includes a reference to women without children -- and the acknowledgement that ours is a perspective that often goes unheard:

The latest Chappell Roan pile-on highlights one aspect of this conversation that is frequently unheard: discussions about maternal representation tend to dismiss, moralize, erase, even pathologize the experiences of women without kids, and even more the experiences of queer women without kids.

...women without children are also frequently blamed for other women’s attitudes toward and experiences of motherhood, and for everything from a failing economy, progressive politics, toxic internet culture, and sociopathy (which, to be clear, occurs at a rate of 3:1 men to women). Such claims are echoed, too, in neoliberal writings, usually by white women with certain economic privileges, who claim motherhood is inherently transformative and transcendent, and that images of liberated women without kids are somehow damaging the motherhood scene.

Care, to be clear, is transformative. And in our lonely, isolated cultural moment, we need more of it. But one need not be a mother to care for other people, or even for children.

• Also on the subject of the Chappell Roan kerfuffle:  Lane Anderson from "Matriarchy Report" asks her readers, "Can we talk about how to create solidarity among women, beyond the hot takes?" 
• What I love about this post is that Anderson actually realizes the motherhood debate is not a binary (i.e., it's the best thing/worst thing). (AND she invites readers without kids to share their perspective in the comments! -- which I did!):  

...But there’s also a third story at play here that’s worth considering:

Another story of American Motherhood/Non Motherhood is the single/child-free woman who is a Childless Cat Lady, is selfish, self-centered, doesn’t get it, and is wasting her life and potential. This is embodied in this case by Chappell Roan herself.

This might be an unpopular opinion, but I actually do think it’s worth listening to what young women who don’t have children have to say about their perceptions of American Motherhood and the discourse thereof. 

• The matter of "what should I do with/will happen to my stuff when I'm gone?" weights heavily on many childless people. For me, as a genealogist, the question of what to do with all the stuff I've accumulated over years related to my family history is a particular concern. Even if none of my cousins or their kids find this stuff interesting (right now, anyway...!), it's quite possible one of THEIR kids or grandkids might. And why reinvent the wheel, right?  So much of what I've been able to build today began with a few documents carefully preserved by my grandparents & their siblings, and the stories they told me.  
• So I was pleased to read in a recent update email from the Ontario Genealogical Society (I'm a longtime member) that they are planning a new "legacy service" which would allow members to donate or bequeath their genealogical research to be digitized (for a fee) in order to preserve it and to share it with others. 
• I was thinking that if no one in my family was interested, I would donate my collection to the museum in the Minnesota county where my mother grew up (if they're interested -- and assuming the border is still open by then... (!) ). They already do a lot of family history stuff, and already have some items related to my family. 
• But it's nice to have another option to consider too.  
• Lisa Sibbett at "The Auntie Bulletin" asks a common question in the childless/free community:  "Who Will Care for You in Your Old Age, If Not Your Kids?" Jody Day's "alterkin" project is highlighted!  
• Jill Filipovic highlights a new study from the Johns Hopkins School of Medicine that shows the number of women dying after being denied life-saving and health-preserving abortions, post-Roe v Wade being overturned, is likely far higher than thought. Excerpt: 

Before the Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade and allowed Republican legislators to ban abortion in most of the states they control, the public narrative around abortion bans was simple: Make abortion illegal, and you get dangerous illegal abortions. And that remains true. But what much of the public didn’t seem to understand is that if you make abortion illegal, you get more dangerous pregnancies. 

• From the Washington Post: "Is listening to a book cheating?" (Let the arguments begin!  lol)  
• My personal viewpoint:  I wouldn't call it "cheating" -- but I find it hard to think of it as actually reading. Nothing against people who enjoy audiobooks (anything that gets people reading/enjoying books is a good thing!). Personally, I feel like I need to actually read a book to really absorb it.  
• (It's the same with podcasts: I enjoy podcasts, but I find I really have to focus my attention on what's being said -- no or minimal multi-tasking -- or else my mind will wander and then half an hour's gone by and I have no idea what I just heard!) 
• On a related note -- my L.M. Montgomery Readathon Facebook group reads & discusses LMM's books, chapter by chapter -- and each chapter is read on video by a volunteer group member. (I've done several chapter readings myself.)  I do enjoy listening to these -- and reading along with them at the same time. 
• Also in The Atlantic:  Daniel Engber writes about "The Evermaskers" -- people who remain covid-cautious, five years after the pandemic began. (Gift link.) 
• (I would describe myself as covid cautious -- I am certainly far more cognizant of the risks and (still) take more precautions than almost everyone I know, although I am not QUITE as vigilant as some of the people in the article, and have been venturing into more places recently without a mask -- so long as there aren't too many other people around.)  

"The Cruellest Month" by Louise Penny

"April is the cruellest month" is the opening line of "The Waste Land" by T.S. Eliot. The phrase also figures in the title and storyline of Louise Penny's third Inspector Gamache/Three Pines novel, "The Cruellest Month," which will be the next book under discussion in the Notes From Three Pines Readalong (date not specified, but generally mid/late month). 

In a timely coincidence, I started reading this book in mid-April (right after I finished Bono's memoir), just after the Easter long weekend -- right in step with the events of this book. We're back in the quaint old Loyalist village of Three Pines, Quebec, back among old friends -- and back in the old Hadley house, which played a key role in the first book and is almost a character in its own right. A seance at the spooky abandoned house ends in tragedy when one of the attendees is seemingly (quite literally) scared to death -- but a closer investigation suggests murder.  Once more, it's up to Chief Inspector Armand Gamache of the Surete du Quebec to unravel what actually happened. 

As with many mystery series, the murder and whodunnit generally plays second fiddle to the characters and to the continuing storylines that play out in the background (and for this reason, I would highly recommend starting with the first book, "Still Life," and reading the books in order).  In this case, the primary ongoing storyline is Gamache's involvement in -- and the continuing fallout from -- what's known as "the Arnot affair." Each successive book in the series so far has fed us a few more pieces of the puzzle, and we learn more -- a lot more -- in this one about what happened. 

In her Goodreads review of this book, Mel said, "This is the book where Penny hits her stride. Where you know your way around the village and people. It feels like Penny breathes a big sigh of relief and settles into the series. Plus it's a great mystery." 

I agree. All the books have been good so far, but this one feels more satisfying somehow. Dark and dramatic, but very well done. 

I'm rating this one 5 stars on Goodreads. Maybe more like a 4.5, but I'm feeling generous, lol.  On to Book #4!  

This was Book #15 read to date in 2023 (and Book #2 finished in April), bringing me to 33% of my 2023 Goodreads Reading Challenge goal of 45 books. I am (for the moment, anyway...!) 2 books ahead of schedule. :)  You can find reviews of all my books read to date in 2023 tagged as "2023 books."  

*** *** *** 

There were a couple of things in this book that I wanted to elaborate on, from a personal perspective. Relevant from an ALI perspective, there was a passage from Chapter 31 that stopped me in my tracks:  a discussion between Gamache and Myrna, the used bookstore owner [edited, with boldface emphasis added by me]:  

'The near enemy. It's a psychological concept. Two emotions that look the same but are actually opposites. The one parades as the other, is mistaken for the other, but one is healthy and the other's sick, twisted.'...

He leaned forward and spoke, his voice low. 'Can you give me an example?' 

'There are three couplings,' said Myrna, herself leaning forward now, and whispering though she didn't know why. 'Attachment masquerades as Love, Pity as Compassion, and Indifference as Equanimity.'...

'I don't understand,' Gamache said finally, bringing his eyes back to Myrna. 'Can you explain?'

Myrna nodded. 'Pity and compassion are the easiest to understand. Compassion involves empathy. You see the stricken person as an equal. Pity doesn't. If you pity someone you feel superior.'

'But it's hard to tell one from the other,' Gamache nodded. 

'Exactly. Even for the person feeling it. Almost everyone would claim to be full of compassion. It's one of the noble emotions. But really, it's pity they feel.'

'So pity is the near enemy of compassion,' said Gamache slowly, mulling it over.

'That's right. It looks like compassion, acts like compassion, but is actually the opposite of it. And as long as pity's in place there's not room for compassion. It destroys, squeezes out, the nobler emotion.'

'Because we fool ourselves into believing we're feeling one, when we're actually feeling the other.'

'Fool ourselves, and fool others,' said Myrna.

*** *** *** 

A possible clue in the mystery comes in the form of the novel "Sarah Binks" by Paul Hiebert (the murder victim had a copy in her night table drawer). 

I've never read "Sarah Binks" but seeing the name gave me a start of recognition. "Sarah Binks" is a 1947 satirical novel, set in Saskatchewan, that won the Stephen Leacock Medal for Humour. 

(If you've never heard of Stephen Leacock, he's another Canadian writer, best known for "Sunshine Sketches of a Little Town," which we read in school.  The book was loosely based on his hometown of Orillia, north of Toronto, and he's buried in the churchyard at Sibbald's Point on the shores of Lake Simcoe, near the final resting place of another famous Canadian writer, Mazo de la Roche, author of the Jalna series of books. Dh & I have stayed a couple of times at a nearby inn -- where de la Roche was a frequent guest, and which some believe was the model for Jalna -- and taken a stroll through the cemetery. But, I digress...!) 

The author, Paul Hiebert, was a chemistry professor (!) at the University of Manitoba -- and the reason I know his name and "Sarah Binks" is that he lived in the same small Manitoba town where my parents live, and where I worked for a year on the weekly newspaper, before I got married in 1985 and moved to Toronto. His little house by the river was apparently his family's cottage, and he moved there permanently after he retired. I never met him, but everyone in town knew him and was very proud that he lived there. (When I looked at his biography and a list of his books, I realized he'd published one in 1984 called "Not as the Scribes" -- the same year my parents moved there, in April. I finished journalism school a few weeks after they arrived, and started working for the newspaper that fall.)  He died a few years later, in 1987. (The cottage has since been torn down and a new house has been built on the site, although I think there's a plaque nearby.)   

By the way -- he & his wife didn't have any children. 

*** *** *** 

One more note:  I knew Louise Penny was a widow -- she mentions her late husband Michael in the preface -- but (surprise!) she's also childless. An interview she gave to Publishers Weekly in 2021 reveals: 

Penny and her husband didn’t have kids (“Michael loved me enough to try, and I loved him enough to stop trying,” she says), but she sees her books as her unique little progeny. “I don’t know that they’ll survive me, but I hope they do. I put everything I have into them. They’re all my beliefs. My DNA. All my time, my efforts. I put my love and focus into them as one would a child.”

"No Filter" by Paulina Porizkova

I entered my 20s in the early 1980s -- the dawning age of the supermodel -- when Paulina Porizkova, four years younger than me, was one of the most beautiful and most famous faces of the era. Her face was everywhere. 

Then, like so many models and actresses of a certain age, she faded from view. I don't think I'd heard much about her or thought about her in years -- until her husband of more than 30 years, Ric Ocasek of The Cars (one of my favourite bands of the late 1970s/early 1980s) suddenly died in 2019, when he was 75 and Paulina was in her mid-50s. 

Paulina and Ric were separated at the time of his death.  She says he had lost interest in her and hadn't touched her in years. In her loneliness, she'd begun a relationship with someone else.  But the separation was amicable -- they still lived in the same house, and were best friends for life -- or so Paulina thought. While reeling from the shock of her husband's sudden death -- she was the one who found him when she brought him coffee in bed one morning, shortly after he'd had minor surgery -- she learned he'd recently changed his will and cut her out of it completely, saying she had abandoned him. Shortly after that, the new love of her life left her too.  

With little income and no savings of her own, Paulina was forced to sue Ric's estate (which included her own two sons). She'd happily let her career take a backseat to his while she raised their children. She merged her finances with his and let his business manager handle her affairs too, while her earnings and savings played a substantial role in supporting their family and the mortgages and upkeep of two houses (one in New York City and one in the country).  

As she began to rebuild her shattered life, Paulina started pouring her grief into her Instagram account, which is where I rediscovered her. I love Paulina's IG, and recommend it highly to other women of a "certain age." So I was eager to read the book she published this fall:  "No Filter: The Good, the Bad, and the Beautiful." It's not a conventional memoir, but more of a collection of short essays in which Paulina reflects on her life and the lessons she's learned along the way -- about things like beauty, aging, Botox, money, grief and heartbreak, anxiety and depression, nudity and nakedness. We learn about her childhood and how it shaped the adult she became: she was raised by her grandmother in Czechoslovakia after her parents fled to Sweden when the Russians invaded in 1968. They battled to be reunited with her, only to divorce shortly after it finally happened. We learn about her early modelling days in Paris, and about the jealous, obsessive man she married.

It's not a long book. It's a little scattered -- it goes back and forth in time, it's not in chronological order --  but I appreciated Paulina's raw honesty and willingness to bare all (in more ways than one!).  "After a lifetime of being looked at, she is ready to be heard," says the book's blurb on Goodreads. I think she's an inspiration, and a pretty smart cookie, as well as a beautiful woman. 

4 stars on Goodreads. 

This was Book #9 read to date in 2023 (and Book #3 finished in February), bringing me to 20% of my 2023 Goodreads Reading Challenge goal of 45 books. I am (for the moment, anyway...!) 3 books ahead of schedule. :)  You can find reviews of all my books read to date in 2023 tagged as "2023 books."  

Odds & ends (& whines, lol)

• "This Valentine's Day, show some love to the one who’s always there." Katie at My Sweet Dumb Brain makes the excellent point that "The only constant in your life is you." 
• Here we go again? Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band just announced some Canadian dates this fall, including two nights here in Toronto in November. (He's also going to be in Winnipeg, for the first time ever! -- 40+ years after dh first romanced me with his music in his dorm room, lol)(on a cassette played on a boombox, lol).  I signed up for verified fan status with Ticketmaster -- which entitles me to the CHANCE to buy tickets when they go on sale (I'll find out next week if I'm going to be allowed to try...!).  
• I'm of two minds:  
• On the one hand:  Bruce isn't getting any younger (and neither are we...!). He's 73.  Who knows how many more chances we'll get to see him again?  He & his music played a key role in our early relationship :)  (as I've written on this blog several times before), and we've seen him together twice in the past in Toronto, in 1985 and 1992 (without the E Street Band) -- dh saw him a couple of times before he met me, and we tried but failed to get tickets for other times he's played in Toronto. (I also tried -- and failed -- to get tickets to see his "Springsteen on Broadway" show in New York City a few years back. A great excuse for a trip to NYC, right? Oh well...!)  He always puts on a GREAT show. 
• On the other hand: I'm mindful of the Elton John tickets saga, and how well THAT turned out...! (and how will SIL feel if we buy tickets to Bruce, after she & I decided to cash in our Elton tickets after repeated postponements and cancellations amid pandemic uncertainty?). I'm also very mindful that (contrary to what some might think), covid is still very much alive and well -- and the prospect of sitting in a crowded arena with 20,000+ other, mostly maskless, singing & cheering people, is not as appealing as it might have been three years ago, to me or to dh...!  (In fact, I recently read that several members of the E Street Band are currently out with covid themselves!) There's also been a sharp increase in crimes on the transit system, which is how we'd normally head downtown. Parking there is both hard to find and astronomically expensive, especially when there's a big event on. 
• (This is assuming we're able to get tickets in the first place... and even if we're able, are we willing to pay the exorbitant prices that will likely be charged?)(Pricing hasn't been announced yet, but as the Toronto Star pointed out, it's likely a far cry from the $10 dh paid to see him in 1978...!)  
• (Why does life have to be so complicated?) 
• A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about how developers are proposing to build a 12-storey condo building right next door to ours (and directly across the street from another, larger 10-storey condo building) -- replacing three houses on/adjacent to the corner of a main road and a residential street, and facing and exiting onto the residential street.  
• Last week, I tuned in online to a recent meeting of our city council where members of the public had their say about the proposed application. There were 45 written submissions (available to read on the city's website) and about 10 local residents speaking at the meeting or via Zoom.  It was fascinating and quite an eye-opener in some respects to watch the process unfold and listen to what they all had to say. It's quite obvious to anyone who sees the site that it's a completely inappropriate place to put up a 12-storey building, but it was informative and validating to hear all the arguments presented in such an articulate way. (I won't list them all here but let's just say the proposed design violates existing zoning laws in more ways than one, not to mention urban planning principles and simple common sense.)  
• Whether that was enough to stop the project -- or at least scale it back to a more reasonable size -- remains to be seen. To their credit, the councillors were unanimous in their opposition -- but they also pointed out that the appeals process is stacked solidly in favour of the developers, enabled by a pro-development provincial government and premier. Sigh. 
• The BBC had what I thought was a surprisingly thoughtful article about the growing number of people choosing not to have children. They point out the difference between childFREE and childLESS, discuss the many reasons why people might not have children, the fact that people tend to lump childless and childfree people together -- AND they talk about how the choice to live without children is still not well understood and accepted  -- a point that I don't think gets enough attention outside the childless/free community. Worth a read!  
• The article uses the term "backlash," which I don't think I've ever heard in a discussion related to childless/free living before.  I read Susan Faludi's classic book on the subject when it first came out in the early 1990s -- and I see there's a new edition available (from 2006).  Time for a re-read, perhaps...!  
• "Freeze now, sell later":  Alison Motluk , who writes the Substack newsletter Hey ReproTech, speculates that some women who freeze their eggs but never use them might eventually try to sell them as a way to recoup their significant financial outlay.  
• Yael Wolfe in Medium:  "This Gen Xer Doesn’t Understand TikTok."  
• This late Boomer/early GenXer doesn't either, lol, and Yael perfectly voices my gripes with trying to keep up with technology (and some of the reasons why I've never sought to expand the "reach" of this blog onto social media and become an "influencer"). (Trust me, some day it will happen to you -- if not with TikTok then some other newfangled app that you don't "get" and have no interest in learning how to use...!) 
• In a similar vein, Anne Helen Petersen recently announced that she is winding down the Discord community she created as an extension of her Culture Study Substack newsletter. Like many online community leaders, she found it was taking up a lot more time and energy than she bargained for.  
• I've been on message boards since 1998, and on the CS Discord for the better part of a year, although I rarely visited there. There were a lot of similarities to old-style message boards -- and yet, I just couldn't figure out how it was organized or how to follow threads, etc.  I guess I really am getting old...??  :p  
• I debated over whether to watch "Not Dead Yet," the TV version of Alexandra Potter's delightful novel "Confessions of a Forty-Something F**k-Up," which I read, loved and reviewed here. Then I forgot all about it. Oh well. 
• I may still watch (I found I can catch up online) -- but from what I've read, I didn't miss out on much. "Struggles to Show Signs of Life," says the Hollywood Reporter. Ominously, the Reporter also says the show is "adapted by David Windsor and Casey Johnson in almost no recognizable way from Alexandra Potter’s novel." ("A loose adaptation," says Slant.)  
• The only real similarities between the book and the TV show seem to be a lead character named Nell who returns home from abroad after her relationship implodes and lands a job writing obituaries.  But in the Hollywood version, the setting has changed from England to California (not surprising, but very disappointing), and... the dead people Nell writes about... talk to her.  A cutesy twist that's definitely not in the book. Sigh. 
• Have you watched it? (If you have, have you read the book first?)  What did you think? 
• I have virtually zero interest in American college or NFL football or the Super Bowl -- but I did watch the halftime show on Sunday... and noticed that Rihanna seemed to be sporting a bit of a tummy. I knew she'd had a baby recently and figured maybe it was leftover pregnancy weight? 
• But then dh told me "Rihanna pregnant" was trending on Twitter, so I Googled and found out she'd had her son back in May 2022.. so...!. (You can see how closely I follow celebrity gossip these days, lol.)  Her management confirmed the pregnancy before the show was over. 
• The childless forums and accounts I follow were full of eyerolls and angst the next morning. CNBCers in the UK reported that Rihanna's pregnancy was the headline news, with who won the Super Bowl coming a distant second/afterthought. 
• Personally, while I did some eye-rolling myself, I found this far less triggering/enraging than Beyonce's ultra-smug reveal of her first pregnancy at the VMAs some years back (ripping off camouflaging clothing and then caressing her belly with a self-satisfied smile, to make sure we got the message)... followed by her photo shoot and then "fertility goddess" routine at the Grammys while heavily pregnant with twins a few years later (which I wrote about here). Oy. 
• (Does anyone actually sing LIVE at these events anymore? It was obvious several times that Rihanna wasn't even trying to lip sync...)  

#MicroblogMondays: Odds & ends

(Not a "micro" post this week, but it's what I've got...!)  :) 

• Friday morning, we drove with BIL & SIL to a nearby mall to meet up with Older Nephew, his wife and her mother, and watch Little Great-Nephew have his photo taken with Santa! I will admit I got a bit teary as I watched (while snapping photos madly with my own cellphone camera!) -- but I would not have missed it for the world!! Santa was just wonderful with him -- it was the same Santa LGN had his photo taken with when he was just a few weeks old, that last pre-pandemic Christmas (2019) -- and as we left, I heard him chuckling and saying "Isn't he cute?" to one of the elf assistants/photographers. ;) (Hey, he's Santa!  He should know, right??  lol)  
• No, we didn't get our photo taken too, lol. LGN had an appointment, and there were other families waiting, so I didn't ask if they could squeeze us in too. It was LGN's day! Maybe another time!  :)  
• We thought we arrived in plenty of time -- it was just before 10:30 a.m., and LGN's appointment was for 10:45. BIL told us that Santa was at the one end of the mall, so that's where we parked.  This was at the other end of the mall from where I knew Santa had always been, pre-pandemic -- but hey, a lot of things have changed since then, right?  
• But then, as we were walking in, Older Nephew texted SIL that they -- and Santa -- were near Entrance #X... on the opposite end of the mall. (In other words, right where he's always been!  lol)  This is a HUGE mall -- the full circuit around it is 1.7 km, or 0.85 km from one end to the other. That's approximately half a mile -- and we had less than 15 minutes to get there!  We probably would have been better off going back to the car & driving around to the right entrance, but we wound up speed walking all the way there, arriving just in time!  (Dh, SIL & I were all wearing masks, too -- and none of us are spring chickens...!)  
• Afterward, we walked back down to the other end of the mall again (near where we had parked) -- at a more leisurely pace this time, lol -- stopping in the Lego store along the way. "HOLY COW!"  exclaimed LGN, dazzled by all the Lego -- especially the models of the Star Wars Deathstar and Roman Coliseum on display!    
• We all wound up going for lunch together at a restaurant within the mall before we headed back home.  
• This was the first time dh & I ate in a restaurant since just before the pandemic was declared in March 2020! ( = 2 years, 8 months!)  
• Not only that -- it was the EXACT SAME RESTAURANT where we'd had that last pre-pandemic dinner out -- with BIL, SIL, Older Nephew, his wife and LGN, who was then about 3-4 months old. How's that for symmetry??  
• Thankfully, the restaurant was not too crowded (about half full, maybe less) and we were in a section with only two or three other tables nearby, near the door ( = at least some fresh air coming in now & then). I kept my mask on until our drinks arrived, and put it back on again after our plates were cleared. 
• As mask-wearers, we were definitely in a small minority of people at the mall that morning -- although I was happy to see that it was (surprisingly, for a Friday, in December, 3 weeks from Christmas) not yet that crowded overall. 
• I splurged (hmmm, seems like I've been doing a lot of that lately...!) and bought an Aranet4 CO2 air quality monitor which Turia recommended in her blog a few months ago.  (It was delivered while we were out at the mall on Friday -- too bad we didn't get it before, because it would have been interesting to have it on hand!)  I'm planning to take it with us on the airplane when we travel in a few weeks' time. Till then, it's sitting on the kitchen counter beside our little hygrometer (which reads the humidity levels -- although the Aranet tracks that too!).  :)  
• Between the Aranet4 and the Dyson purifier/humidifier we got a few weeks ago, it's been fun monitoring all the data and watching the humidity and air quality numbers go up and down during the day, and how they change if, say, we run the bathroom fan or the essential oils diffuser, or make toast...!  (What can I say, I am my father's daughter -- my dad always did love a cool gadget...!  lol) 
• Speaking of the Dyson, I am very happy we got one. I love using the app, I like how you can adjust the settings for the purifying fan speed and target humidity, I love getting notifications when the water tank runs out, and I love how easy it is to refill! (Cleaning also sounds pretty easy to do, although I haven't yet had to do that.)   
• After almost a month of smooth sailing, Bloglovin' is out again this morning (eyeroll & SIGH...).  
• I recently mentioned that Margaret Atwood is now writing on Substack! A couple of her recent posts have been absolutely priceless -- albeit perhaps best appreciated by citizens of Toronto and/or Ontario...!  ;)  She will also be writing about... writing! 
• Jake Gyllenhaal, the actor, has written a children's book! Click on over -- you'll want to see the subject and why he wrote it. :)  Thank you, Jake!  Putting this on my to-buy list (for Little Great-Nephew -- and our new great-nephew or great-niece!) when it comes out next September (2023)! 
• I was gutted when I heard about the death of Christine McVie of Fleetwood Mac this past week.  :(  I couldn't believe she was 79!!  (In her 70s, yes -- but 79??)  Everyone raves about Stevie Nicks, and yes, she's great, but I always thought Christine McVie was amazing and never quite got her full dues by comparison (although the obituaries have been effusive).  
• I bought "Rumours" when I was in high school (I think I paid something like $4.99 for it, at the Bay in Winnipeg)(and several other FMac albums after that) -- I played it constantly for years, and I still play it now & then (the CD version, now that Older Nephew has all my vinyl, lol). "Songbird," Christine's signature song, from that album, is one of my all-time favourite songs. (Mick Fleetwood has said he wants it played at his funeral.) I never got to see FMac in concert, but apparently it was the standard closing encore number -- just her and her piano, and that beautiful, crystalline voice. Sheer perfection. (Her maiden name was Christine Perfect, by the way...!)
• And of course, she was "one of us" (Stevie Nicks too) -- i.e., childless, not entirely by choice. There's a quote that was circulating widely in the CNBC community this past week, in which she said, "There were never any children [for me]. There was always a career in the way. It was a case of one or the other, and Stevie would say the same. The lads went off and had children but for Stevie and I it was a bit difficult to do that. So that was never able to happen. And I never found the right man. Not through want of trying." 
• About a week earlier, I was also sad to hear that Irene Cara died at the too-young age of 63 -- also apparently childless. I loved the movie "Fame" (which she starred in), and while I know most people remember her for the title song (as well as "What a Feeling" from "Flashdance"),  my personal favourite from that movie is "Out Here on My Own," which was written by the late, great (also childless) pop singer from the 1960s, Lesley Gore.  :)  
• The New York Times had an article recently about the growing numbers of aging Americans (baby boomers & Gen-Xers = ME!  lol) who are living alone, and the mismatch between their needs and available housing. Some of the people in the article are parents, but some are not, and the issue of aging without children is specifically mentioned (albeit not elaborated on in any significant way). It's the first time I can remember reading about this issue in a mainstream North American publication! and it's nice to see it's getting some attention!  
• And... a SECOND NYT article on the same subject!! (specifically focused on "kinless" seniors). (Someone please pinch me, lol.)  I think this one is even better than the one above, to be honest. As I said, SO nice to see this issue finally getting some attention!!  
• Speaking of aging:  I listened in to a New Legacy Radio podcast recently, live, where Christine Erickson talked with Patricia (Trish) Faulks (of the blog "Just Me & Lilley") about "Embracing Solo Aging While Confronting Pronatalism and Ageism." You can listen in on the website and on most podcast platforms. (Christine has a new or repeat episode on a childless/free-related topic every Tuesday at 1 p.m. Eastern time.) 
• Jody Day of Gateway Women appeared on a popular lunchtime program on BBC Radio 2 on Friday, Dec. 2nd to discuss Jennifer Aniston. unsuccessful fertility treatments and involuntary childlessness, followed by a call-in segment with some great callers. :)  She's the first guest, starting at about 1:06 into the program. You can listen via the link until the end of December. 
• More Jennifer Aniston, including the voices of other IVF survivors who didn't get their "miracle babies": this time from the Huffington Post. Some great quotes here... and I particularly liked this observation in the narrative: 

If the perfect girl beamed into our televisions via nonstop syndication couldn’t have a baby, then, truly, it could happen to anyone. And if she picked up the pieces of that heartbreak and went on to have a successful career and a fulfilling life — what might that mean for the rest of us?

You can find more of this week's #MicroblogMondays posts here. 

Updates, odds & ends

• Update on my last post: We're (still!) fine: we tested before we went to LGN's birthday party yesterday afternoon (at the request of Younger Nephew & his pregnant wife -- we all did).  Negative. And feeling fine.  :) 
• Yes!  It was LGN's THIRD birthday this past week!! Older Nephew & his wife invited us all there for dinner & cake last night. LGN was bouncing off the walls with excitement -- it was so cute to see.  :)  (The dog was excited to see us all too!)  He kept demanding his cake all through dinner... and once the candles were blown out and pieces cut, etc., he didn't eat a bite, lol. Too distracted by his new toys. Toddlers!  ;)    
• (How much longer can I refer to him as "Little" Great-Nephew??)  And if Younger Nephew's child -- due in February -- is a boy, I guess I'll have to start referring to them as LGN1 & LGN2, or something like that? And if it's a girl, I guess I'll have to spell out Great-Nephew and Great-Niece to make myself clear?? LGNe & LGNi??)(Which brings to mind "Monty Python and the Holy Grail" and "the Knights Who Say Ni!" -- but now I'm really getting off track...!  lol)  
• Speaking of covid -- one of my uncles (my dad's next-oldest sibling, who is about 85) is currently in the hospital with covid. :(  He is hearing impaired and cannot speak (at least, not clearly enough for most people who don't know him to understand him) -- married later in life, but his wife died about two years ago. No kids. The homecare workers couldn't reach him to get into his apartment, so they contacted one of my cousins (married, childless, a nurse in her mid-50s) who lives nearby and keeps an eye on him. She left work and drove over to where he lives (about a half-hour away), found him barely responsive, and took him to the hospital (I think the same one where she works?), where he is now in acute care. Thank goodness for her. And *&^% covid.  :(  
• More Jennifer Aniston fallout:  
• Infertile Phoenix is "Still Thinking About Jennifer." 
• An article from CNN online interviewed four women whose IVF stories (like Aniston's) did not end with a baby -- including Katy Seppi of Chasing Creation and Lighthouse Women. 
• Jess at "A Different Path" had a great piece published on Insider.com about labels (the difference between childLESS and childFREE):  "After years of trying to have a baby, I consider myself 'childless not by choice' ." 
• I struggled with the childless/childfree labels very early on in this blog -- in fact, it was the subject of my THIRD blog post here! 
• Recent reading: Jill Filipovic spells things out very clearly in a recent edition of her Substack newsletter:  "They're coming for contraception. They're coming for IVF." Read and share! Sample passage: 

...make no mistake: Leaders of anti-abortion organizations are either opposed to IVF, or silent about it — perhaps biding their time.

...there is a longer-term strategy here. The pro-life movement knows that banning IVF and many popular and highly-effective forms contraception would be wildly unpopular, enough to create huge political backlash even on the right. So they’re using the same strategy they used for abortion rights: Take the question out of the hands of individuals, and even out of the hands of voters; chip away at rights at a steady clip to acclimate the public to the very idea that these rights are up for debate; install members of a reactionary minority into positions of power and have them rule over all of us.

There is not a single major pro-life organization in the United States that openly supports contraception use and access. There is not a single major pro-life organization in the United States that openly supports IVF as it is routinely practiced.

#MicroblogMondays: More Jennifer Aniston, plus various odds & ends

• The shockwaves from Jennifer Aniston's groundbreaking (and very brave) interview with Allure continue to ripple through the infertility and childless-not-by-choice communities.  Here's a roundup of some of the blog posts, opinion pieces and media clips I've run across in the aftermath to date:  
• I was lucky enough to catch a post by Jody Day on Thursday morning (Nov. 10th, on the private Gateway/Lighthouse Women community) that she would be talking about this on BBC World at 4:45 p.m. London time -- which was 11:45 a.m. in Toronto, and just 10 minutes later!  So I managed to watch Jody's brief segment, live :)  -- if there is a video clip available, I will post the link later! The interviewer actually asked some intelligent questions, and Jody managed to cram in a lot of good information and bust a few myths within the very few minutes allotted... well done!!  
• It was also discussed on a BBC radio program -- the segment starts around 1:05 into the broadcast, and goes for a full half hour! It will be available online for about a month. 
• "Jennifer Aniston is Officially One of Us!"  (Pamela, Silent Sorority) 
• "One of Us: Phoenix Rising" (Infertile Phoenix) 
• "So Grateful for Representation" (Jess, Finding a Different Path) 
• "The Jennifer Aniston Interview" (Melissa, Stirrup Queens) 
• "The one about Jennifer Aniston (and the John Lewis advert)" (Berenice Howard-Smith, Medium) 
•  "How Jennifer Aniston’s Devastating Revelation Is a Lesson to Us All:  Can we please stop asking this damn question!" (Ali Hall, Medium)
• Katie Couric shared it on Twitter!!
• "How Jennifer Aniston’s fertility became everyone’s obsession" (Zoe Williams, The Guardian) 
• "Thank you, Jennifer Aniston, for telling the truth about IVF" (Jessica Hepburn, The Telegraph -- registration required) 
• "I’m glad Jennifer Aniston has spoken out about unsuccessful IVF. I’ve been through it too" (Kat Brown, The Times). Sample passage: 

It isn’t fashionable or sexy to talk about the slog of infertility without a happy ending — too miserable, too depressing. I can think of many stars of Aniston’s age who have instead had a child by a surrogate or showed off a “miracle baby” in their later years, such as Naomi Campbell at 50. Yet for people who, like me, go through IVF without success, the grief can feel utterly terrifying and unmooring. As can the feeling that you’re the only one who has failed.

• Jess at Finding a Different Path had an article published on Insider.com!  Go read it: "After years of trying to have a baby, I consider myself 'childless not by choice.' "
• A thoughtful article about pronatalism and "population alarmism," flagged by Jody Day:  "Dismissal of “Population Alarmism” is Rooted in Pronatalist Ideology" by Nandita Bajaj, Executive Director of Population Balance. Sample passage [emphasis mine]: 

...social and institutional pressures that would force more childbearing are far stronger today than any impetus for family planning or concerns about population growth. Pronatalism is at the heart of unchecked population growth, which is occurring on the backs of those with the least personal or reproductive autonomy, who are most vulnerable to coercion.

In the past, reprehensible abuses such as forced sterilizations and other human rights violations were committed in the name of population control. But today, coercive pronatalism is the analogous threat. It’s a more prevalent, pervasive, and equally egregious form of population and reproductive control. It’s just being used toward the opposite end.

• There is a growing clamour from the medical community in Ontario -- currently swamped by the triple storm of covid, flu and RSV (three times the usual number of cases for this time of year) -- to reinstate mask mandates. The Chief Medical Officer of Health is supposed to be making an announcement today (Monday). The word is that he will NOT be reintroducing mandates -- but he is expected to "recommend" that people mask up voluntarily. Like, that's worked SO well to date??  Un-frickin'-believable... :p  
• On that note... ummm.... confession time!  Last night -- as I mentioned here, under "Worrying" -- we went to a party celebrating dh's cousin (and godson)'s wedding (which took place in August 2021, but was restricted to immediate family only because of ongoing covid concerns), and the couple's baby, due in February. Dh's aunts' recent funerals aside, it was the first indoor gathering of this size we've attended since before covid.  
• UNlike the funerals, nobody was wearing a mask... including... ummm... me. (Gulp.) I had some in my purse -- but I did not put one on. For one thing -- I'll admit -- there's that reluctance to stand out in the crowd and be "that person" -- even when you know it's the right/wise thing to do. :p  For another, I knew all of these people, and I did trust that most (not all, but most) of them were vaccinated, and would stay home if they weren't feeling well (and some actually did just that). (After all, the "bride" is six months pregnant...!) Also -- we spent a lot of our time eating and drinking ;)  (and the food was great, btw...!). 
• One person who probably should have stayed home but didn't: SIL (!), who was hoarse, losing her voice and showing other symptoms of an oncoming cold.  She came in our car with us, and BIL went with Older Nephew and helped him navigate. She did take a covid test before we left, which was negative (although I know she could still get a positive result later).  
• The party was held in the (fairly large) party room of the groom's mother's condo building, with about 40-50 people (maximum capacity 60) -- all from the groom's family, and the vast majority from the side of his family he shares with dh (his dad & dh's mom were siblings). It was good to see everyone after so long (and for a much happier reason than a funeral...!). 
• Younger Nephew & his pregnant wife, both very covid-cautious, did not attend. But Older Nephew & his wife did, and they brought Little Great-Nephew, who had a blast and stole the show (sorry, bride & groom...!).  Only a few of the family had actually seen LGN yet, and most of the few who had hadn't seen him since he was an infant, just before covid hit.
• I guess we'll find out within a few days whether we dodged a bullet or...?  :(   (I can't help but feel that, OF COURSE, it would be just my luck to get covid the first/one time in more than 2 & 1/2 years that I venture out into a big social gathering with a lot of people without putting on a mask...!)(while others go their merry way for months on end, maskless, without incurring any penalties)(yet??).   
• I have virtually NO interest in football... EXCEPT at this time of year. No NFL or American college football for me (or Canadian college football, for that matter, which attracts virtually zero interest here) -- I'm talking the Canadian Football League (CFL) and the Grey Cup, the national championship game, which will take place next weekend in Regina. The East and West division finals were this past weekend, here in Toronto and in Winnipeg. Dh & I watched both games (well, dh watched, anyway -- I glanced up from my computer now & then, lol) -- and the two winning teams who will face off for the cup are... the Toronto Argonauts and Winnipeg Blue Bombers. NOW who do I cheer for??  (The Bombers, actually, the team I grew up cheering for -- albeit I won't be heartbroken if the Argos win either...!) 
• It's bad enough that I get several friend requests from strange men every week on Instagram... but lately, I've been getting some on Goodreads too (of all places!!). Anyone else??  

 You can find more of this week's #MicroblogMondays posts here.  

She IS "one of us"!!

Well, what do you know??  

Jennifer Aniston IS "one of us"!  

In an interview/cover story with Allure magazine released today, Aniston spoke honestly about how she tried -- and failed -- to have a baby (via IVF), even as speculation swirled about her lack of children ("when? with who?? why not???").  As is the case for so, so many other women and couples (albeit you never hear about it), it didn't work for her. 

She says she might write a book. I'd buy it!  :)  

I've always admired her, but this just takes it to a whole new level. To have someone of her public stature speaking our truth is like gold. 

I don't often refer to my childlessness or infertility journey "in real life," but I was so excited, I posted the article on Facebook, with this note: 

Jennifer Aniston, much love, thanks and respect to you for speaking up so honestly on such a hugely personal subject. To have someone like you going public with a story that is so familiar to so many of us (and yet so misunderstood by so many others) means so much!

On Instagram, Tanya Hubbard (@rest.your.heart.here)  wrote what many of us are feeling right now: 

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by rest.your.heart.here|Tanya Hubbard (@rest.your.heart.here)

 

Jennifer Aniston bares it all (well, most of it, lol), 
including her personal story of infertility and childlessness. 
(On a different note, this is (sadly) the cover of the final print edition of Allure, 
which was always among my favourite magazines.)