"The Wedding People" by Alison Espach (re-read)

I hugely enjoyed "The Wedding People" by Alison Espach the first time I read it, back in February 2025, and I immediately pegged it as a book my Childless Collective Nomo Book Club would likely enjoy, as it features that rare creature: a childless-not-by-choice heroine!  Happily, my co-host read the book and agreed!  and our group will be reading and chatting about "The Wedding People" throughout the month of October.  :)  I just finished re-reading it in preparation for our discussions, and (spoiler alert! lol)  I enjoyed it just as much the second time around.  

At first glance at the cover and description, you might dismiss this one as a "beach read" -- after all, it takes place during a lavish week-long "destination wedding" at a swanky oceanside resort hotel in Newport, Rhode Island. But there's more to the story here.  

Phoebe Stone arrives at the Cornwall Inn without luggage, dressed up in a green silk frock and gold high heels. We soon learn why she's there. **CONTENT WARNING & SPOILER ALERT** She's always wanted to stay at the Cornwall, and she's flown there from St. Louis on the spur of the moment to treat herself to one last big splurge -- before she commits suicide. Her husband has left her, for someone she thought was a friend (a colleague AND a mother to boot!), following repeated (unsuccessful) rounds of IVF and a miscarriage. She just turned 40.  She's also struggling with job burnout and -- the final straw -- the death of her beloved cat.    

But while checking in, Phoebe learns the entire hotel (apart from her suite) has been booked for a lavish, week-long wedding party.  Almost immediately, she's drawn into the lives of "the wedding people," and, in particular, the self-centred, chatty young bridezilla, Lila.

So -- much more than a standard "beach read."  The book touches on a lot of sensitive themes/realities that the many readers will relate to (especially childless women), including some sharp observations about marriage and weddings, grief and loss, friendships and how they change over time. But it's also a fast and often very funny read that kept me turning the pages.  

Overall, I (still) loved it. :)  My original rating for this book was 4.5 stars on StoryGraph, rounded down to 4 on Goodreads. "5 stars was very tempting," I said then. 

This time around, I'm giving into temptation:  5 stars.  :)   

This was Book #26 read to date in 2026 (and Book #1 finished in September), bringing me to 65% of  my 2026 Goodreads Reading Challenge goal of 40 books. I am currently 1 book behind pace to meet my goal. You can find reviews of all my books read to date in 2026 tagged as "2026 books."  

Odds & ends (including a World Childless Week webinar!)

I've been struggling a bit lately, with writing more regularly in this blog -- and with other parts of my life too. It feels like there are a gazillion things demanding my attention, and all I want to do is bury my nose in a book (Kobo reader?) or my phone and scroll mindlessly. I bounce from one thing to another and accomplish nothing, and fret over the dumbest little things. Frankly, I think I might be a little depressed -- and I guess it's not surprising, given the events and stresses and losses around me this past year(s/) -- both personal and in the broader world. 

Writing IS (always has been) a comfort and an outlet, though, and I have been collecting more odds & ends to share with you here (albeit there are a lot I meant to flag that have slipped through my fingers). Here are a few things I've been noticing and thinking about lately:   

• Latest annoying/anxiety-inducing thing:  Our GE Profile dishwasher (original to the condo, so likely about 12 years old) is leaking water from the bottom. :(  We've stopped using it (washing dishes by hand), and even turned off the valve to shut off the water to it, but it's still getting wet under there. 
• I've been sliding rags or sheets of paper towel underneath to catch and mop up the drips, and swapping them out for dry ones every few hours. 
• Beyond the leak, the springs on both sides of the door have snapped in recent years -- meaning we can't just open the door and let it drop (because it DROPS!) -- we have to either hold it or balance it against a hip and load/unload the dishes that way -- or lower the door very gently, and then rehook the hinges up to close it back up properly again. 
• Given these issues (and the likelihood of more to come), and given that 12 years seems to be ancient in appliance terms these days (yikes), we recently went dishwasher shopping. What to pick, from a dizzying array of choices?? (Did I mention I've been having some anxiety issues lately??)  
• We eventually selected a KitchenAid model. It's being delivered next Monday. 
• (I had to notify the property manager of the impending delivery -- and cough up a $500 (Canadian) security deposit in case of damages to the elevator or hallways during delivery/removal of the old machine. It will be returned, assuming all goes well. Sigh...) 
• Huge congratulations to Mali at No Kidding in NZ, who has been named People's Champion for World Childless Week 2026!!  She wrote about it here, and you can read her WCW profile here  So well deserved!!  
• Speaking of World Childless Week, it's next week!  I'll be writing more about it in the days ahead, but I especially wanted to give you a heads-up that I'll be appearing in a Zoom webinar/panel discussion on Thursday, Sept. 17th at 9 AM (Eastern time), along with three of my friends from the Childless Collective:  "All in the Family: Childless women, Caregiving/Caring and Family of Origin Dynamics." 
• Y'all know, I live some 1000 miles away from my family of origin -- and my (younger) sister has been the main point person as our parents have aged (and, in mom's case, passed away in January). But Sandy, the webinar organizer, thought it would be interesting to have my perspective on caregiving and contributing from a distance, so...! 
• You can watch live on Zoom, and the video will be posted on the WCW 2026 website and YouTube channel later that day for later viewing. More details and a sign-up link here.  
• We lost three childless/free icons in short order recently:  first Dolly Parton, then Tim Curry, followed by Gloria Steinem. (Did I mention I've been a bit depressed lately?? -- this didn't help...!) There's been some great writing on various childless/free blogs, etc., about these three and what they meant to us. 
• Gloria Steinem in particular was a familiar presence when I was growing up in the 1970s. Going through my old school essays when we were cleaning out my parents' house last spring, I was amused to find a declaration in one along the lines of "I'm not a big women's libber" -- ah, youth!!  Even if I was reluctant to embrace the F-label as a teenager (lol), there's absolutely no doubt what a huge impact Steinem and the women's movement had on my life, and that I have evolved considerably since then.  ;)  
• I was fortunate enough to briefly encounter Gloria Steinem twice in my life:  
• In 1994, I stood in line at a bookstore in the underground city that runs below Toronto's Financial District during my lunch hour to get her to sign a copy of her latest book, "Moving Beyond Words" (which I still have).  
• Several years after that, she was speaking at a convention of the Ontario Human Resources Professionals Association. Someone had given one of my coworkers tickets;  she was working, but my mom was visiting me and I was off that week, so she gave them to me and Mom & I went to the Toronto Convention Centre to hear Gloria speak.  We also caught a glimpse of her walking through the halls outside the meeting rooms. She was in her 60s then and wearing a miniskirt -- and she looked fabulous in it.  :)   Rest in power, Gloria. And thank you. 
• I was sad to read in the Toronto Star that Gilda's Club recently closed its doors here. 
• I was reminded of a post I wrote wayyyyyy back in 2012 (!) about Gilda Radner (who was childless not by choice) & Gilda's Club. (I also mentioned Gilda in this post from last year, about the Saturday Night Live 50th anniversary celebrations.) 
• Sidenote:  The O'Keefe Centre/Hummingbird Centre/Sony Centre I refer to in that 2012 post has been Meridian Hall since 2019.  Sigh... 
• (The SkyDome is still the Rogers Centre -- but there's now also the Rogers Stadium, which -- as many unsuspecting event ticketholders have discovered, to their dismay! -- is about 20 miles away from the Rogers Centre, in a completely different part of the city...!) 
• New York Times gift link:  "When the Choice to Be Childless Is Not Your Own" by Anna Louise Sussman, author of the upcoming book “Inconceivable:The Impossibility of Family in an Age of Uncertainty.” The article is U.S.-specific, but some of the questions it raises would apply in many other countries. 
• Sample quote:  "...what if we thought of starting a family as a fundamental human experience that should be available to all? What if we extended the ability to have a family — one that many possess as a matter of good fortune — into a basic human right?"
• (Not sure I have the "right" to have a family -- no one can guarantee that -- but I believe it should be a lot easier to TRY to have one, if that's what I want...)
• You've probably heard of "manspreading" -- entitled and oblivious men, spreading out and taking up valuable public space (particularly on public transit). How about "mumspreading"?  Emma Harris thoughtfully explains (on her own website, and on the Life Without Children Substack -- well worth a read!):   

Mumspreading, as I use it, describes something analogous: the ways in which some mums can take up physical, conversational, emotional space without much awareness of the impact on those around them.

This is, ultimately, a post about the invisible grief of childlessness, and what it means to take up space in a world not designed with you in mind.

"Flying Solo" by Linda Holmes

"Flying Solo" by Linda Holmes is a followup to her debut novel "Evvie Drake Starts Over," which I read earlier this summer. 

Laurie Sassalyn is turning 40, single (again, after recently calling off her wedding), and back in her hometown to clear out the home of her beloved, recently deceased (also single and childless) Great-Aunt Dot. (The book is set in Calcasset, Maine, the same setting as "Evvie Drake," and includes a shoutout to Evvie and Dean from that book). 

Tucked away in a cedar chest, Laurie finds a mysterious wooden duck that piques her interest. A local antique dealer tells her the duck is worthless and gives her $50 for it. Laurie soon realizes she was conned, and enlists some of her old friends -- including her old boyfriend Nick, now the town librarian and divorced -- to help her get the precious duck back. (There's more to the story, but that's the barebones of the plot.)  

I picked up this book expecting another light romance like "Evvie Drake." It is -- but it isn't (it's a little more complicated that most romcoms, and it doesn't end quite like you might expect). I certainly did not expect it to turn into both a mystery and a caper/heist story, lol.  And needless to say, as someone who, like Laurie (and her Aunt Dot), didn't have kids (albeit for different reasons), is coming to terms with aging and recently spent time clearing decades and generations of accumulated stuff from her parents' house, there was much here I could relate to. ;)  

I rated "Evvie Drake" 3 stars all round. In some ways, I liked it better than this one;  in some ways I liked this one better. They're both good reads in their own ways. I finished it in two days flat. 

3.5 stars on StoryGraph, rounded up to 4 on Goodreads.  

Additional ALI/CNBC notes: One of Laurie's brothers and his wife are infertile and going through  IVF.  There's a long conversation in which he, Laurie, Nick, and Laurie's best friend June talk about having children (or not).  

This was Book #22 read to date in 2026 (and Book #4 finished in August), bringing me to 55% of  my 2026 Goodreads Reading Challenge goal of 40 books. I am (for the moment, anyway...!) 2 books behind pace to meet my goal.  :(  You can find reviews of all my books read to date in 2026 tagged as "2026 books."  

Odds & ends

I've been collecting "odds & ends" of links for at least a month now... I know I've missed out on recording a LOT of great stuff I've read lately, but I think it's time to share what I do have! 

• Big (((hugs))) to Mali at No Kidding in NZ, who recently lost her husband.  :(  
• Ali Hall at Life Without Children ponders something many childless & childfree women have realized:  too many people wanting (expecting?) a village, too few people stepping up as villagers. ("How Expecting One-Way Support From Women Without Kids to Mothers Is Anti-Village.") 
• Also from Ali Hall: "Why It’s Important for Childfree and Childless People to Have Friends Without Kids" (as well as parent friends).  
• Jody Day shares more details about her Alterkin project, one year after it began, on her Gateway Elderwomen Substack. 
• Not necessarily ALI/CNBC related, but worth a read (made me smile!):  Mary Elizabeth Williams, an American living in Glasgow and writing on Substack, ponders "What Scotland's Tartan Army can show us about joy."  :)   (One memorable line:  "be the chaos goblin you wish to see in the world."  lol) 
• This one might not be an an easy read for some of us in our community -- I certainly found myself cringing as I read it.  And for a "Critic's Notebook," I wish the article contained less of fashion commentary and more actual criticism, and had more to say about pronatalism and the agenda at work here, etc.  But it certainly reflects where American society & politics are right now...! Gift link:  "The Politics and Power of the Pregnancy Image." 
• A member of my Childless Collective Nomo Book Club -- where we recently read "You Are Here" by David Nicholls, one of my favourite novels of recent years -- alerted us recently that the BBC is adapting the novel, and has cast Claire Foy and Matthew Macfadyen in the roles of Marnie and Michael.  Nicholls is doing the screenplay, and the director, Lenny Abrahamson,  was in charge of the exquisite screen version of "Normal People,"  so this bodes well!  
• Sara Petersen at "In Pursuit of Clean Countertops" on Patreon talked to Kathryn Jezer-Morton about her new book ("The Story of Your Life"), "the flat story," "snark communities" and redemption narratives. Fascinating stuff!  
• Kirstie Kimball at "beyondbeurreblanc" is an independent food critic from Minnesota, who wrote a moving essay about her infertility:  "The Ghost in My Third Bedroom."  (T/W:  Cancer.)  
• Jill Holly at "Spinster-esque" on Substack has some great content related to being childless/free, including several recent posts with reading recommendations. Example:  "Books to become a feisty childfree elder:  All the inspo you need to age disgracefully."  ;)  
• Lana Manikowski has had several thoughtful posts lately on her Substack "Infertile and Childless. So Now What?"  including "The Hardest Part of Infertility" and "I’m Not the Same Woman I Was When Fertility Treatment Ended." Sample passage:  

For years, I thought surviving fertility treatment was the hardest part. Looking back, I couldn’t have been more wrong.

Turns out, the hardest part wasn’t going through IVF. It was figuring out who I was when there wasn’t another protocol to try or another cycle to start.

25 (!!) years of childless living

25 years ago today (!), while licking the wounds (physical, mental, emotional) inflicted by five-ish years of trying and failing to conceive a baby -- including three years of unsuccessful fertility treatments plus a stillbirth at 26 weeks -- I took my first concrete step toward acceptance of the new reality I found myself facing: I posted my story on the Childless Living message board on a now-defunct site called iVillage.  (I've been sharing my story here on this blog since fall 2007 -- coming up to 19 years now!)  

I started writing a "25 years later/things I've learned about life without children" post -- and then I realized I was repeating myself:  I already wrote many of the same things five years ago, in a post titled "20 years of childless living."  Have a read there!  

There is life (and joy) without children.  Not better, not worse than being a parent. Just different.  

Thank you all for being part of my journey so far on this road less travelled!  

What lessons/advice from your own childless living experiences would  you add?  

#MicroblogMondays: Ahhhhhh.... summer....

I've noticed that the flood of emails and other online distractions demanding my (increasingly limited -- erk...) attention slow to a trickle on weekends (and holidays).  And so I was able to carve out some time over this past weekend (and a couple of afternoons during the week as well) to just put down the phone/laptop, grab a book and a drink, and head out to the balcony for an hour or so to read.  The weather was pleasant (not too hot and/or humid -- although that's supposed to change over the next few days...!), the balcony remained shady until about 4:45 PM, and there wasn't a lot of ambient noise coming from the usually busy main road in front of the building or from the neighbourhood.  Ahhhhh....  what a nice kickoff to summer!  (Long may it continue...!).

You can find more of this week's #MicroblogMondays posts here. 

Odds & ends

• Anyone else feeling overwhelmed by the sudden onslaught of prom, graduation and last day of school photos on social media this week??  (In Canada/North America, anyway -- I know different countries have different school year calendars!) It's been going on in dribs & drabs over the past month or so, as the school year wound down, and I've been doing OK so far -- but today/tomorrow is the last day of school hereabouts, plus lots of grads & proms this week, and it's like I've reached the saturation point…! 

• Mel is marking a big milestone over at Stirrup Queens! Go over and congratulate (and thank) her!  

• Sue Fagalde Lick at "Can I Do it Alone?" recently landed in the hospital :(  Go wish her well and read some of her posts from the past month about what happened and what childless seniors living alone can do to better cope with these crises. 

• On a related note:  Jody Day was interviewed about her Alterkin project, aging as a childless person, and aging generally, as part of an article on aging in The Atlantic! Here's a gift link for "Americans Are in Denial About Elder Care." (Not just Americans...) 

• Jody Day also flagged this thought-provoking article from "The Shift by Sam Baker" -- a guest post from Kim Willis:  "Stop calling me 'child-free'." 
• I wrote a similarly themed post in the early days of this blog, almost 19 (!) years ago (and have returned to the subject several times since then):  "Am I childLESS or childFREE?"

• Nora McInerny reminds all of us who take photos to "Get in the picture." (That includes those of us without kids -- a subject I have written about in the past -- here, for example.)  

I’m only asking you to consider that with the exception of the worst people in the world, life is tragically short. Someday, you will look upon this version of yourself and see yourself through new eyes. Eyes that might need bifocals or cataract surgery, but eyes that still work well enough to see that you, with that rogue chin hair or the jeans that Gen Z TikTokkers are trying to bully you out of wearing are more beautiful than you know.

Someday you will long for the version of you that exists today, however flawed you believe her to be. Give future you something to marvel over, grab your Cybershot, and get in the picture.

• “Everything happens for a reason.” Or does it?  Lexi Weber Johnson at "Not Expecting" explains why this is not a helpful thing to say to someone who is grieving. 

Underneath the “everything happens for a reason” line is something more universal: a discomfort with uncertainty. We want life to make sense. We want outcomes to add up. We want suffering to belong to a larger story. Because the reality that some things simply happen, full stop, is harder to bear.

• Jennie Agg at Life, Almost says "I can't keep up." (She is singing my song...!)
• Jennie also has thoughts on "Trimester Zero" (!). ("Let's not do this.") 
  

• I haven't quite lost all my elders yet -- I still have my dad, and most of my dad's siblings, and my maternal uncle's wife, and several of my mother's cousins (and am thankful for every day I still have them all in my life). But I found myself nodding vigorously as I read Cyndie Spiegel's post from "Life, Created" ("v. 70 One Day You Realize That There's No One Left to Ask"). 
• I have been feeling this keenly since my mom's death in January, and the task of sorting through several generations' worth of possessions. More and more, I feel my past slipping through my fingers and receding into the distance. And I'm mourning that loss alongside the loss of my mom.  

"The Mitford Affair" by Marie Benedict

My latest read is "The Mitford Affair" by Marie Benedict, a book recommended by my book club co-host (and a potential future read with the group). I already knew a bit about the six Mitford sisters -- offspring of a well-connected British family, who came to prominence as young women in pre-World War II -- and I've long wanted to read more about them. 

"The Mitford Affair" focuses on the family's three eldest daughters in alternating, short chapters:  Nancy, the oldest, who narrates her sections in the first person; Diana, the family's golden girl, who leaves her Guinness heir husband for the (married!) British fascist leader, Oswald Mosley; and Unity, a misfit whose zealous devotion to fascism and the Nazi Party takes her to Germany, where she develops a relationship with the Fuhrer himself, Adolf Hitler. (Next-youngest sister Jessica, known as Decca, plays a lesser role in the story -- she's a dedicated Communist, in contrast to Diana & Unity's fascism -- while younger sisters Pamela and Deborah and brother Tom are barely seen or heard from.)  

The book follows the family, and the three oldest sisters in particular, from 1932 to 1941, and explores the growing tensions between Diana and Unity's increasing devotion to the Nazi cause and Nancy's increasing unease with it -- which comes to a climax when the war begins.  

This was the first book I've read by Marie Benedict, who has written other historical novels focused on interesting women, including actress/scientist Hedy Lamarr, physicist Mitza Maric Einstein, scientist Rosalind Franklin, author Agatha Christie, and Lady Clementine Churchill (a cousin of the Mitfords who also pops up in "The Mitford Affair," along with her husband Winston -- also a cousin to the family). It was a little on the long side, and could probably have been a bit shorter. The constant back and forth between the different characters' stories and viewpoints felt a bit choppy at times, and I was slightly annoyed at first by all the nicknames the sisters have for each other and the people around them, until I finally got them all straight....! 

That said, despite its length and the shifting viewpoints, this was, overall, a fast, easy and interesting read that kept me turning the pages, especially near the end, and especially once the war began in 1939. I finished it in just three days.  (Dare I say, Nancy's struggles to understand her sisters' obsession with a charismatic but volatile leader and his distasteful political philosophy resonated with this modern-day reader...!)  And now, having read this fictional account of the Mitfords' lives, I'm curious to read something on the non-fiction side about them to learn more :) -- and perhaps also read a novel or two by Nancy Mitford, some of which are mentioned in the book.   

I was initially thinking 3.5 stars on StoryGraph and debating whether to round up or down on Goodreads -- but the last 20% or so of the book prompted me to assign 4 stars even.   

ALI/CNBC note: There's a subplot related to Nancy's efforts -- ultimately unsuccessful -- to have children. CNBC readers will relate to Nancy's encounters with her more fertile, pregnant sisters.     

This was Book #12 read to date in 2026 (and Book #2 finished in June), bringing me to 30% of  my 2026 Goodreads Reading Challenge goal of 40 books. I am (for the moment, anyway...!) 5 books behind pace to meet my goal.  :(  You can find reviews of all my books read to date in 2026 tagged as "2026 books." 

Recent odds & ends

• World Childless Week (WCW) has announced the daily topics for WCW 2026 (Sept. 14th to 20th).  Learn more about WCW 2026 and how you can get involved here.   
• In a blog post for the World Childless Week website, Gayle Letherby offers "Some Reflections on Being ‘Other'." 
• Lana Manikowski at "Infertile and Childless: So Now What?" poses an important question: "When IVF Fails Again and Again: How Do You Know When Enough Is Enough?" 
• Lexi Weber at "Not Expecting" shares five observations about infertility (including that "Infertility makes you weird at brunch").  
• PJ is "In Transition" -- and yes, PJ, this all definitely sounds familiar!!  (Read her post and a few of my latest, and you'll understand why...!)  
• Every now & then, a long-dormant blog on my blogroll will pop to the top of the list with a new post. "Tips on Triplets" re-emerged recently with a post ("Trauma Chameleon") looking at the lingering effects of loss and trauma, 15 years later. 
• Y'all know I love the Flavia de Luce novels by Canadian author Alan Bradley. Sadly, I learned through one of my book clubs (where we read the first Flavia book together which was happily very well received!) that Bradley died on May 19th at age 87. How he managed to channel an 11-year-old girl (from 1950s UK -- when he'd never set foot there before he wrote the first book!) so incredibly well will remain a mystery...!  
• Very happily, he left one final Flavia novel for us:  "Numb Were the Beadsman's Fingers," available on Nov. 3rd.  :)  Also, "Flavia" the movie (based on the first Flavia book, "The Sweetness at the Bottom of the Pie") will be released in North America on Dec. 4th! (It's been out in the UK since early April.)  

(SOME of the) Things I found while helping to empty out my parents' house

My parents were married for more than 65 years, and lived in the house that just sold (and is closing at the end of this month) for 42 years. During that time, they also helped clear a couple of other people's houses (and accumulated some stuff from those places) -- most notably the house my mom grew up in, which was built by her grandparents/my great-grandparents after their marriage in 1904, and bulldozed in early 1998. (My grandparents had moved in the early 1980s, to an apartment and later to the care home in town, but there was still a lot of stuff left in the house until just a few years before it was torn down.). 

Neither my mom, nor my grandmother, were very good about throwing things away (to put it mildly...). In a nutshell, there was (and still is) a LOT of STUFF to go through!  My sister & I started going through closets while I was still there in December/January, and she has continued the work over the past few months (mostly on weekends, because she's still working and lives about an hour away). By the time I got there a few weeks ago, the pile of boxes in the closet assigned to me to go through had grown quite a bit since my sister sent me the photo I used in this post) -- and of course there were still other closets and cupboards to empty too. 

Some of the stuff was mine. (I'm a bit of a packrat too -- although moving to and living in a condo has forced me to do better...! And suffice to say, I would not want to leave a similar amount of stuff behind for the nephews to go through, after I've gone...!)  My sister & I have done two or three weed-outs of our stuff at Mom & Dad's in the past, but there was still a LOT there that needed to be sorted through and disposed of. Somewhat miraculously, I managed to pare down what was there enough to fit into one box (after filling a suitcase to take home with me -- also miraculously, it did NOT exceed the airline's weight limit!!).  My sister and her partner have agreed to keep the box for me for one year. I figure I'll be heading back in July and likely again at Christmastime, and should be able to bring what's left home with me over the next two or three visits.    

It was physically tiring work, but emotionally exhausting too. (Kleenex was required.)  All these things, saved and treasured by my mom & grandmother (and great-grandmother) for all these years... and now it was up to my sister & me (both childless -- the buck stopped with us) to decide what the heck to do with it all.  

We sorted things into several different piles:  

• keep (for Dad's apartment, my sister or me, or possibly PND), 
• ask our cousins if they want it (not likely, as they just finished emptying out THEIR parents' & other grandparents' houses!), 
• recycle, 
• take to the local thrift store,
• take to the local library (books),
• possibly sell? (PND's dad sells vintage stuff through his eBay store -- he got some jaw-dropping prices for our old Barbie dolls and their clothes!). 
• I also set aside a few things I thought should be offered to the museum in the Minnesotan county where my mom's family is from.  (Not sure how or when we can get things to them, since neither my sister nor I are anxious to cross the border anytime soon...)
• Sadly, many of the things we found had to be tossed -- but I did take a lot of photos of some of the more interesting or memorable items. 

Among the things we found:  

• Tchotchkes upon tchotchkes... decorations for all seasons! (My sister is keeping some of the Christmas decorations for now, since Dad has expressed an interest in having a small tree in his apartment.)  
• At least four or five (mostly) complete sets of dishes, some of which my dad & sister took. The rest went to the thrift store.  
• Drinking glasses (some of them chipped and cracked -- we gleefully tossed those -- we'd been trying to get our mom to throw them out for years!!).  And lots of coffee mugs.  We took the ones that get used the most over to Dad's apartment.  
• We found an entire set of vintage early 1960s highball glasses that I dimly remember from my childhood, wrapped in newspaper and packed away in a box in the garage. I don't think it had been opened since Mom & Dad moved in, 42 years ago. When we realized what was in the box, we closed it up again and set it aside to go straight to the local thrift store.  
• An entire box (plus an entire drawer) filled with vintage recipe books that belonged to both our Mom and Grandma, as well as their boxes of recipe cards and piles of recipes written on random pieces of paper. My sister set most of these aside to go through later. 
• (There was also a stack of recipes in our great-grandmother's handwriting -- most of them in pencil and barely readable. Sadly, most of these got tossed.)  
• More empty plastic margarine tubs and casserole dishes than anyone will ever have use for.   
• Piles of towels and sheets, worn threadbare -- as well as some that were like new and barely or never used?? 
• What seemed to be every single greeting card my grandmother ever received, dating back to at least the 1940s. (Grandma, I love you, but seriously??)  
• Umpteen vintage postcards, some of them signed (some by family members), but many of them blank. (These may ultimately get tossed, but my sister is going to look into whether they're worth anything.) 
• Boxes & boxes and piles & piles of old photos (both our family's and Grandma's), dating back to the late 1800s. Some identified or identifiable, but many sadly not. (My sister is going to arrange to have them scanned, or as many as possible, but says she can't keep all the originals, which makes me cringe.)  
• Tax receipts and receipts from local businesses in my mom's/grandmother's hometown, dating back to the early 1900s, including some for my great-great grandmother's house.  (Those got tossed.) 
• My grandmother's report cards from school. (She wasn't a particularly good student!) 
• All of MY report cards from school! (I took these home with me.)  
• Letters and paperwork related to my medical history as a child, including a couple of vaccination records. (Ditto above.)  
• A box containing my childhood/teenaged/young adult diaries & journals and assorted other writing. This was a huge relief, as I'd been looking for these on previous visits home and they were not where I thought they should be. There were a lot more notebooks than I'd remembered, and they made a HEAVY pile!  I took some of the earliest (and likely funniest) ones home with me and will bring the rest on future visits. 
• I didn't have time to go through them, but I did glance into a couple (and shook my head -- "He's not worth all the angst, teenage Loribeth!"). 
• I may toss some or all of them eventually, but I would like the chance to look through them more closely first, and I didn't have time to do that then. 
• I did immediately toss one notebook filled with really bad, cringeworthy teenage poetry. Yikes!!  lol  
• I'd tossed most of my school notebooks, etc., during previous clearouts -- but I'd still kept several scrapbooks, projects, etc., plus programs from high school band concerts, drama productions, etc. and many of the essays I'd written.  I think I kept every university essay too.  I tossed almost all of them, but took photos of some of the grades and teacher/prof comments. 
• I had to chuckle/shake my head when I looked at the titles/topics of some of the papers (which sounded strangely familiar/current...!):  Quebec separatism, western Canadian alienation, the rise of the Moral Majority and evangelical churches' influence in U.S. politics, Trudeau's record as prime minister (Pierre, obviously -- Justin was a child at the time!)...  Plus ca change...! 
• On a Grade 12 essay on Shakespeare's Hamlet, my teacher dryly observed, "So much story here to get to the point you wish to make."  I took a photo of that comment -- touchez, Mr. P!  (Dh will tell you things haven't improved over the past 45+ years...!  lol and ouch!) 
• A stack of vintage 1970s Osmonds bubble gum cards. 
• A stack of all the 1970s-era 45s my sister & I owned (separately & jointly, pooling our allowances). 
• LPs: I already had most of mine (and gave them to Older Nephew when we moved into our condo), but there were still plenty owned by my sister, ones we owned jointly (lots of Archies, Partridge Family, Osmonds, Bay City Rollers, K-Tel compilations), Christmas albums (many of them gifts from our grandparents), and ones that were my mom's. 
• Beautiful church certificates from my great-grandparents' 1904 marriage, as well as similar baptism certificates for several of their children, including my grandmother. 
• Guest books for both my grandparents' funerals, my great-uncle's funeral and my parents' 40th wedding anniversary party.  
• Stacks of letters/notes that my grandparents wrote to each other in the years between when they started going out together (late 1920s) until their marriage in 1937. This floored me, because they lived in the SAME SMALL TOWN during almost all of that time!!  Many of them didn't even seem to have been mailed (no envelopes, just names written on the back of carefully folder pages.  I'm guessing they passed notes to each other in the hallways at school, or had them delivered by friends?  
• Another (smaller) pile of letters.... from other girls to my grandfather (!!).  Flirtatious ones too, from what I gathered at a glance. (No time to sit and read all this stuff, even if I wanted to!)  
• This also floored me for two reasons:  (1) My understanding was my grandparents only ever had eyes for each other... apparently not!  (2)  My grandmother actually KEPT these letters from her rivals in her house??!  
• A vintage 1899 single-page "love letter" in beautiful handwriting, from my great-grandfather to my great-grandmother (!), apparently in the early days of their courtship. She was leaving on a trip west:  he laments that their acquaintance to date has been too brief, and ends by asking her to "Please do not forget your [name]."  Awww..... 
• A pile of letters and V-mails from my great-uncle (my grandmother's younger brother) from when he served in Italy during World War II, as well as his induction notice, discharge papers and other related paperwork. He never married or had children... lived a quiet, unassuming life with my grandparents after he returned from the war, and worked on a local honey farm as a beekeeper, until his untimely death at age 58.
• Also:  my grandfather's induction notice, and his medical board rejection notice (!). 
• Also:  a stack of my great-grandmother's wartime ration books (!) -- WITH coupons still inside them!!  
• I insisted to my sister that these need to be donated to the county museum. I think I've convinced her.  (I hope.)  I took photos of one of the letters, but I wish I'd had time to read more of them.  
• An entire box filled with letters my mom wrote to my dad (!) and her pre-dad boyfriend/fiance from nursing school (she was there one year before getting married), as well as a diary. Yes, I was curious!  But -- my sister & I decided there are some things you probably shouldn't know about your parents (especially when one of them is still around), and agreed these needed to go, unread. 
• My mother's 1960 wedding dress (short, pale blue) and several vintage 1950s prom/bridesmaid dresses.  The wedding dress sadly had long-established mildew stains on it and had to go, but my sister is going to see if any vintage stores or charities that outfit girls for prom would be interested in the others.  
• MY 1979 graduation dress. (I took a photo of it and put in the pile for the thrift store.) 
• Several adorable children's dresses that my sister and I wore back in the 1960s.
• An adorable little red sweater with white trim and little buttons that look like owl faces, hand-knit for me when I was a toddler/pre-schooler by one of my mom's high school friends. We showed it to PND and she took it home to wash and see if it would fit Little Princess #3.    
• A large box filled with smaller boxes, ALL containing Mom's jewelry (and some of Grandma's too, I think). The vast majority of it was cheap costume stuff.  We didn't have time to go through it, but my sister said she will and she'll set aside anything she thinks I'd be interested in. 
• And... a little wooden chest, that I'm going to post about separately.  

It's not often that I manage to make my sister completely crack up
with laughter, but this photo did the trick!!  🤣
It's from a Grade 1 (1966-67) scrapbook project, titled "Ways Plants Help Us."
The page on the right is captioned "Beauty and shade" 
and apparently is illustrated with a vintage ad for bras and girdles!  
🤣🤣🤣

Right now

Right now...* 

*(A (mostly) monthly series/meme.  Explanation of how this started & my inspirations in my first "Right now" post, here. Also my first (similar) "The Current" post, here.)

May was yet another (very!) busy month. (How is it possible that we're almost halfway through the year already?) 

Some of the things I/we did this month include: 

• Went to the bank for some cash, and the drugstore to pick up a prescription for dh. (May 1st) 
• Shopped for groceries at the supermarket and picked up some takeout soup or pizza slices there for lunch. (May 4th & 25th.) 
• Walked and shopped at the local mall with dh. (May 5th)  
• Dropped off some dead batteries in the recycle bin at Canadian Tire, and had a browse at the bookstore. (May 8th) 
• Visited my dad in Manitoba (May 9th-24th). I'm hoping to write more about this trip in a separate post(s) soon, but in summary:  While there, we worked with my sister & her partner to continue to clear out the house (which has been sold -- closing date July 2nd) and move Dad over to his new apartment and get him settled in there (same town). Sorted through decades and decades of STUFF, not only mine and my parents' but my grandparents', great-grandparents and even a few things from my great-great grandmother, dating back to the late 1800s/early 1900s!  Yikes!  
• We also took my dad to a hospital in a (larger) nearby town for a CT scan (mostly positive results), and also drove with him (through a dust storm!!) about an hour away to do some banking in the town where we'd lived, 1976-80, and where my sister and I graduated from high school. I hadn't been back there in DECADES, and it was quite a blast from the past to drive past our old house, the schools I attended and other familiar landmarks...!  Lots of changes, but also a lot that was recognizable!  
• Picked up prescriptions at the drugstore (May 26th). 
• Indulged in a manicure/pedicure, and then went to the supermarket to pick up some supplies for the weekend (May 28th).
• Headed up to dh's cousin's cottage for the weekend (May 29th-31st), where we've spent a weekend each September/October for the past several years with the cousin, his wife, BIL & SIL.  
• This time, however, the party included ALL of the cousins from that side of the family (those living in Canada, anyway) and their partners (!! -- total:  16 people!). (Dh & I were the oldest people there -- he's 69, the youngest cousin there was 45! We were also the only couple there without children.)  
• I was hoping that since all of these cousins' offspring are now teenagers or young adults, the kid conversation would be minimal. Unfortunately, no such luck. :p  Would you believe one night all the women started recounting (parts of) their kids' birth stories??  (Even though their kids were born something like 15 to 42 years ago??).  And debating whether or not you'd want your mother-in-law to attend the birth (another strikeout topic for me -- even if I'd succeeded in having a child, my MIL died before I ever met her).  I quietly left the table, went to my room and busied myself with straightening up our clothes, etc., until I could hear the conversation take a different turn.  
• These cousins tend to be a rather, ummm, boisterous lot. I was already pretty exhausted from the emotional and physical demands of being at my dad's for two weeks... needless to say, this weekend wasn't entirely restful either...!  
• These caveats aside, the hosts were gracious (as always -- we got there early with BIL & SIL and had a nice few hours with them before the others descended...!), the property is gorgeous, the food was great, and overall, we did enjoy ourselves some..!   

*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** 

Also right now:  

Reading: I finished 2 books in May (all reviewed on this blog, as well as Goodreads & StoryGraph, & tagged "2026 books").  Year to date, I've read 10 books,  reached 25% of my Goodreads Challenge goal, and am currently 6 books behind schedule to achieve it by year end.  

• "Regeneration" by Pat Barker. Slow readalong with Footnotes & Tangents (April 3rd – May 14th). (4 stars, my review.)  
• "The Ministry of Time" by Kaliane Bradley (the June book for my Childless Collective Nomo Book Club;  previously read and reviewed, here;  most recent review here;  rated 4.5-5 stars both times.) 

Current reads: 

• "The Hacienda" by Isabel Canas (the July book for my Childless Collective Nomo Book Club).  6% read to date. 
• "The Forsyte Saga" by John Galsworthy. After mulling it over (see this post!), I accepted a commenter's suggestion to do a readalong together!  Currently 40% completed. 
• "Childless: A Woman and a Girl in a Man's World" by Fabiana Formica.  This one is beautifully written, but slow going, and I was reading it (or trying to...!) at Mom & Dad's last summer, where there were a lot of distractions. I've put it aside for the moment to focus on other reading priorities, but I've completed 33% to date.
• "L.M. Montgomery and Gender," an essay collection edited by E. Holly Pike & Laura Robinson. Slowly working my way through, in between the other books...! 

Coming up: Most of my book groups have their next reads plotted out for a few months in advance -- and listing them here helps me keep track of what I should be reading next. ;)  

• For my Childless Collective Nomo Book Club:  
• "In Memoriam" by Alice Winn (August).  (I previously read and reviewed this one, here;  4-5-5 stars.)  
• "Young Woman and the Sea" by Glenn Stout (September)
• "The Wedding People" by Alison Espach (October). (I previously read and reviewed this one, here;  rated 4-4.5 stars.)
• "The Women" by Kristin Hannah (November)
• For my D.E. Stevenson group: Next books to be determined;  taking a bit of a break in the meantime... 

• Footnotes & Tangents slow readalongs for 2026 include:
• "The Inheritors" by William Golding (June)
• "Treacle Walker" by Alan Garner (July)
• "The Children’s Book" by A.S. Byatt (September–December)

(Not sure I will take part in "The Inheritors" or "Treacle Walker,"  but "The Children's Book" sounds interesting!)  

A few recently purchased titles (all in digital format, mostly discounted ($5-10 or less) or purchased with points): 

• "Buckeye" by Patrick Ryan
• "Motherland" by Julia Ioffe
• "The Book of Sheen" by Charlie Sheen 
• "Strangers" by Belle Burden 
• "My Name is Barbra" by Barbra Streisand 
• "Liberty Street" by Heather Marshall 
• "One of Us" by Elizabeth Day 
• "UFO" by Garrett M. Graff 
• "The Patriarch" by David Nasaw 
• "Family of Spies" by Christine Kuehn 

*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** 

Watching: 

• "Finding Your Roots" (season 12, plus plenty of reruns) on PBS, Tuesday nights.
• "The Count of Monte Cristo" (on PBS, 8 episodes with the finale on May 10th).  Lost treasure, lost love and ridiculously complex revenge plots! with a huge cast of characters and subplots to keep straight (not sure I succeeded??).  But also jaw-dropping sets/locations and gorgeous costumes. I enjoyed it!  With Sam Claflin as Edmond/The Count, and Jeremy Irons as the old Abbe who tells him about the treasure.    
• My dad normally watches PVR-d episodes of his (& Mom's) soap opera ("The Young and the Restless") late at night, but we did see most of the penultimate episode of  "The Late Show with Stephen Colbert," including Bruce Springsteen's appearance at the end. while we were in Manitoba. (Missed Paul McCartney the following night, but did manage to see the highlights the next day.)  

Playing:  

• Heardle Decades: (as of May 31st): I mostly abandoned Heardle while I was at my dad's, but here are the latest stats, for what it's worth....!  
• Heardle 60s: 74.1% (927/1251, 376 on first guess), unchanged since April 30th. Max streak: 21. 
• Heardle 70s: 74.7% (746/998, 417 on first guess), down 0.2% from April 30th. Max streak: 18. 
• Heardle 80s:  41.4% (352/850, 134 on first guess), down 0.1% from April 30th. Max. streak: 5.
• Heardle 90s: 33.1% (315/952, 81 on first guess), down 0.2% from March 31st. Max. streak: 9. 
• NYT Connections: 
• As of April 30th, I'd played 624 games and won 89% of them (unchanged from Dec. 31st), including 337 "perfect puzzles" with zero errors, and 18 where I got the most difficult/purple category first (unchanged from Dec. 31st). Maximum winning streak: 45 (unchanged since June 30th, 2025). Current streak: 11. 
• By May 31st, I had completed 654 games, won 89% of them (unchanged since Dec. 31st), including 352 "perfect puzzles" with zero errors, and 20 where I got the most difficult/purple category first (an increase of 2 since Dec. 31st). Maximum winning streak:  45 (unchanged since June 30th, 2025).  Current streak:4.  

Listening (not watching!):  To "Judge Judy" and the Game Show Network TV shows -- both favourites of my dad (and they were inescapable!  Arrrrggghhhhh....!).  

Following:  . 

Eating/Drinking:  

• Over the past 18 months, we've been trying to eat healthier and lower our cholesterol -- and avoid having to take (more) medication -- since some less-than-stellar bloodwork results for both of us in fall 2024 and then again (for me) last November (2025, as mentioned in November's Right Now post). 
• I ended May 1.2 pounds less than when the month started.  Overall, I'm down 16 pounds since late October 2024 -- close to my lowest weight in more than a decade -- and 28 pounds from my heaviest-ever weight  (in August 2021). 
• (Dh is down almost 18 pounds overall since fall 2024.)
• This was not the greatest month diet-wise, to put it mildly. While at my dad's, we at a lot of takeout (hamburgers, chicken, pizza). Meals at the cottage included lasagnas, chicken skewers, grilled steaks with potato salad & corn on the cob, and homemade pizza ("white" pizza for me).  While home, we indulged in takeout pizza slices or soup from the supermarket, once or twice a week, for lunch and/or dinner. 

Wearing: The weather continued to have its ups & downs -- so there were days in May when I was wearing long yoga pants/jeans, socks and sweatshirts, and others when I (finally!) put on my capris and sandals.  (The overnight low reached just 2C while we were in Manitoba, and at the cottage it was 8C, although it got up to 22C during the day.)  

Buying (besides books, lol):  Not much this month. 

Hoping: That Dad likes his new apartment and settles in well. 

Prioritizing:  Helping out Dad & my sister, when & how I can, here and there. . 

Planning:  Our next trip to Manitoba, around Dad's 87th birthday in July. (Up for debate:  whether we'll stay one week or two?) 

Trying:  To clear a few things off the to-do list here before heading west again, including having a closer look at the things I brought back with me and finding homes for them all.  

Appreciating: My sister (and her partner). Thankful that they've been there every weekend (but one) since January to support our dad and help him navigate through this tough transition -- and my sister just started a new job too!! (at age 63!!) (If I think I'm tired, I know that goes double or more for her...!) 

Noticing: All the leaves have popped out during the two weeks we were away. My eyes have also been stickier in the mornings these past few weeks (presumably a reaction to the increased pollen in the air). I've been taking daily Claritin as a precaution...! 

Anticipating:  Spending some time with Little Great-Nephew #2 soon:  his mom's maternity leave has ended and she returns to work on June 1st.  SIL will be looking after him, as she did with LGN #1 (who will be joining is brother this summer, after school lets out later in June).  

Wondering:  What we should do for our wedding anniversary in July? 

Wanting:  Some quiet downtime...!  (before we have to head back to Manitoba again...!).  

Loving:  Being able to have the balcony door open again during the day. (At least until the heat & humidity kick in...!)  

                        

Feeling: Extremely tired.  :p